You know you live in the country if......

[MicroRoy]

When the water company and police department share the same parking lot!

The police car angle parks on main street. The old police car is out back up on blocks.

 

[exploziv]

Where I am, main street is just a dirtroad lined with crushed rock. We don't even have a police station in our town. They just have a small room at the town hall. And the police car can't even reach my place, which is about 2 km away from town, on a muddy dirt road that floods sometimes. They have to come on foot or get a ride on the horse wagon of a farmer going to the surrounding fields.

 

[RB56]

When you can only see your partner's face during sex when there's a full moon.

 

[PrimalHaze]

My vicegrips are being used for faucet handles.

hahaha been there

 

[exploziv]

When you can only see your partner's face during sex when there's a full moon.

When there's a full moon during sex I'm usually looking at other part of her body..

 

[Bud Green]

You know you live in the country if......

You're going down your driveway,
and you gotta stop and ask your friends to please get out of the way...

 

[noyd666]

when a side of beef is hanging on the veranda.

 

[MicroRoy]

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Found them in a clearance bin.

Wouldn't use them on a wing nut. But they will hold a fatty.

 

[rykus]

When Your wife punched a bear to save your dog, lol.

 

[redlaser]

sacramento.cbslocal.com/2015/04/28/placer-county-man-punches-bear-in-face-to-save-his-dog

 

[St. Phatty]

You give a young couple a non-kink hose as a wedding gift

and people compliment you on your thoughtfulness.

 

[Capt.Ahab]

You start extra tomato plants to trade with the neighbors.

 

[redlaser]

One of the neighbors got a Lama along with a few pot bellied pigs and about ten miniature goats that are still young and maybe 35 lbs. tops apiece. They were in a pen with four foot fence to separate them from an untrained German shepard male about a year old. Owners left for a couple hours and at some point the dog gets in the pen and when they get back the lama has the dog at bay although it was run pretty ragged, bruised and shaking with drool two feet long hanging from its mouth. Lama is about twenty years old, no goats were injured or the pigs. The last goats they had were taken mostly on one night by a cat that hangs around. The dead goats were found beheaded with the entire spine still attached to the skull.

 

[PrimalHaze]

sacramento.cbslocal.com/2015/04/28/placer-county-man-punches-bear-in-face-to-save-his-dog

i love it


“The man or beast that I run from ain’t been born, and his momma’s already dead,”

“He come up like this, and turned, boom, I hit him hard. Tyler said I damn corkscrewed his head,”

 

[Capt.Ahab]

When the neighbor stops by and asks if you are willing to do some woodchuck "control" in his cow pastures.

 

[Happy Rooster]

When the only pie you smell in your neighborhood is cow pies.

 

[Betterhaff]

When the neighbor stops by and asks if you are willing to do some woodchuck "control" in his cow pastures.

Or he gives you a box or 2 of 22/250's after he plants his corn and beans.

 

[MicroRoy]

When the neighbor stops by and asks if you are willing to do some woodchuck "control" in his cow pastures.

As a kid I spent many hours popping ground squirrels sparrows and pigeons.

 

[noyd666]

when the kids on farm eat the silage. true.

 

[stoned-trout]

yeehaw...