the dumbest shit you ever said.

[Guest]

I am an artist and I always paint figures, so I observe a lot. See what happens to people's bodies in different positions etc.

So, way back in college , I was looking at my then girlfriend laying face down naked on our bed. I noticed that her ribcaged flattened out when she was laying down. Without thinking , I said:

"You know , you're even wider laying down than when your sitting up."

Duh... not the thing to say to a woman!

 

[cannigrow]

dbl post

 

[cannigrow]

LOL ok ok. I got a good one. Not me, but a friend of mine. He's puerto rican, and not native to the US so his English is less than perfect.

So he's going at it with his girlfriend one night, and she's feeling pretty hot so she goes, "talk dirty to me...". Our friend responds, "you're so fucking stupid" in a totally serious way. He thought "talk dirty" meant talk shit, insult. lol lol. Needless to say that romantic session probably came to a screeching halt. classic.

 

[alexnalaskaOG]

that electric fence aint on....zzzap

that bull wont gorde me

that gun aint loaded

that knife aint sharp

will that dog bite

that limb will to hold my weight

that mayo aint spoiled

spulsh...is that dog shit

 

[East Valley]

"no i dont mind if you search my car"

 

[Guest]

lmfao alex!! i love smartass comments like that

 

[NOKUY]

getting lotion out....talking to self...dayumit alex. your 41 and masterbating AGAIN....well someone has to clean out the old nut meat....oh man im bored.

"yummybud" has this section of the market cornered.

...maybe you should try another "angle"

where is your grow thread bro?

 

[The Anchorman]

"Sure, saran wrap works just as good as rubbers"

"Wow officer!, I didn't think you'd ever catch up"

"Your sister likes it when I do that"

"Try typing F disk, that should fix it"

 

[Guest]

cannigrow: your modified double post confused the hell outa me for a second....
its not ssafe to read these while high...my doctor said its bad for my ribs...

 

[cannigrow]

LOL my bad. I had one of those reload browser spurts where I kept trying to backtrack, and ended up posting it like 3 times. Oops.

 

[cannigrow]

I got another...my friend has one of those "idiot savant" type girlfriends. Not really, but sometimes I think she is because she says some real stupid shit.

Anyways, we're sitting around high, talking about tinfoil for whatever reason and she goes "what is tinfoil even made of?"

My buddy and I looked at each other in amazement.

 

[Trees McGee]

"Thats why I never have died yet"


TMcG

 

[DimeBag65]

well im not sure if this rings true for anyone else...

sometimes in conversations when there is a pause the usual hang word would be but...


iv heard several people slip up on it and i know i have a few times... so for an example here goes...


me and jane were going to go to the store and get some papers but... f#ckin the place didnt have any...

or something along those lines where but and f@$king are conjoined words... ill call people on it sometimes, usual quite entertaining when someone realizes they just said butt f#$kin.... anyways not sure anyone else finds that amusing... just something that i remembered coming across in conversations...

 

[Guest]

he said but fucking

 

[Guest]

Yer not fat honey, yer just chunky. I seriously said that to my wife when we first got married.

Mo

 

[East Valley]

wow guys, come on...bub started a good thread, and you could call each other names in PM

 

[East Valley]

i hope you work it out in the end, best wishes to both, hope things are healed...somehow

 

[Tarkus]

I told Daisy jane that she is pretty when she wears makeup. Still funny to this day.

When a friend's mom saw me for the first time in many years, she said "Wow, you have gotten much bigger!" Absentmindedly I said "You too!" It was a comment that was made while I wasn't thinking clearly. She was able to laugh it off.
Gotta love backhanded compliments....Wow, you are not as fat as you used to be!

 

[alexnalaskaOG]

i wanna reg at this site. the people seem cool

 

[Revegged_Clone]

Dude, grab my piece... (hey, my pipe was about to fall!)

When my girlfriend called my phone and a female cohort answered:
sorry, mamita, it's just i was in the shower...

When a cop searched my backpack and pockets and found a couple hundred in dollar bills and and half a phillies box:
cop, holding the money: wow...your friends sure smoke a lot of cigars(he was saying it sarcastically... obviously)
me: nah, that's just the change for the weed...

got slapped a couple times for that one, but funny nonetheless, haha

got the money back right away though, thank god for video cellphones...

(BTW, it was a legal search... he had suspicion of trafficking as he saw an exchange of money in a known drug spot, otherwise i wouldn't have allowed it)

LOL ok ok. I got a good one. Not me, but a friend of mine. He's puerto rican, and not native to the US so his English is less than perfect.

So he's going at it with his girlfriend one night, and she's feeling pretty hot so she goes, "talk dirty to me...". Our friend responds, "you're so fucking stupid" in a totally serious way. He thought "talk dirty" meant talk shit, insult. lol lol. Needless to say that romantic session probably came to a screeching halt. classic.

just a minor correction. puerto ricans ARE native to the us... they are natural born citizens... Otherwise the US would be in violation of UN resolutions.