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Spit a Freestyle, it's worth your while

Blackstone

Member
Jam Master Jaco said:
*edit* Will I ever run out of stuff to say?
(ponders Jacob to himself on this glorious day)
Nah, that'll probably never ever happen
(typed the Jam Master on his keys tap tappin')
What if I tried to be unique and narrated a rap?
(To which I answered to myself "fuck that crap")
Why should I feel it necessary for self narration?
(because your bored dude, now stop the hesistation)
what hesistation? How can I type and hesistate?
(dude shh! you're fucking up the flow, it used to be great)
I'm sick of you always telling me things, this shit I hate!
(oh great, here we go again. go vent your feelings to Nate...)
No! Not this time! I'm gonna stand up for myself!
(like that time you bought a self help book to get millions in wealth?)
Well no, not necessarily. I bought that shit on a limb, and only barely.
(on a limb? that's rarely. stop shouting and try to debate fairly)
how's about I just stop pretending to be shizophrenic?
(ok that works. but first let me upgrade your status to lieutenant)
Get these pins off me! I'm done playing this stupid game!
(well it was your choice to dress in camoflouge and look really lame)
That's it! Fuck off! I'm done. I'm gonna rap normal for the rest of my runny
(pfft you don't even rap you just rhyme crazy shit and pretend to be funny)
Well that's a little harsh even for you won't you admit?
(no you're just looking for reassurance that your crap isn't shit)
crap isn't shit? that doesn't even make sense you twit
(well it does on a spiritual level, at least a little bit)
Nah, I feel stupid now. Time to bask in my sorrow
(alright...oh yeah, before I go can I get that movie I wanted to borrow?)
Oh yeah, I almost forgot. That's an illegal copy so don't get caught.
(don't sweat it man. I've dodged bullets and not gotten shot)
Ohhh jam master's concience that's kinda hot
(whoa, weirdo alert. I'm leaving before it's too late)
No don't go yet our friendship is fate!
Dude? Ya there? dammit! oh well...bedtime cuz it's late.

:yes:
 
J

Jam Master Jaco

Yo I'm the resurrected Bob Marley
choppin' barley on a Fatboy Harley
American flag bandanna, I'm really gnarley
and intimidating, my mouth foams when I get snarly
Until I get home and pussy whipped by my darling :whip:
her name is Bertha, with a name like that you guessed it
She's 300 pounds, 6 foot 6 and makes me depressive
cuz I don't want or get sex I'm opressed
To all my friends those facts I've confessed
But it's ok cuz my biker friends understand me
except on initiation night when like cattle they brand me
but now I'm in the super cool fraternity of bikes
once I die tho I'll end up in an eternity of spikes
cuz I'm going to hell cuz I'll end up killing Bertha
then finally have sex with her corpse and all it's girtha

*edit* Umm...yeah...I'm just gonna stick with normal rhymes
I promise I won't put necrophagia or corny shit in my lines
Unless I'm really drunk which in turn makes my mind sunk
down to a level of rhyming known as "gunk"
it sucks cuz it an obvious attempt to sound like a hunk
but in the end actaully makes me look like a chump
unless you're in the mood to hear it, who am I to judge?
Oh yeah I'm the rude king to sneer it and I won't budge
self proclaimed master of all that is humor
quicker wits then a school girl passing a rumor
bigger tits then a chick with a breast cancer tumor
hot damn I'm on a roll I wish this would've happened sooner
cuz the beginning of this shit was like a teenage mooner :moon:
annoying and cliche but with just a hint of hilarity
words flow through my fingers quick in this moment of clarity
so now that I feel intelligent what should I spit?
Ah I could tell the tale of that one chick with a third tit
It was small but noticeable and made my nuts roastable
cuz it was on her back and squeeked when she slid down the pole
that's right! she was pole dancin'. I spit game so I wasn't chancen'
the possiblity that she might think I'm gay like the dudes in Hanson
But anyways, her normal bra size was C, and third one more like a B
I was suprised at first but soon dropped my animosity
cuz a third tit was hot to me, until I stopped to pee
and comprehended the fact that I went off topic
about a some third tittie hot shit
that I am spewing publicly about this rant
...uh oh...that chick was my Aunt

oh ho ho....bet you didn't see that one coming! zing!
 
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Blackstone

Member
I wanted to spit a little rhyme for the hell of it
What's up with JMJ's 3-titty relatives
If my girlfriend had 3 tits I would be celibate
That's all I got, this rhyme is irrelevant

edit:you can tell my good herb just from the smell of it
my growing skill is genius like Belichick
I'm master of the earth with control of the elements
I'm hardcore like steel, you weak bitches are delicate
 
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G

Guest

:laughing: LOL,thats so fricken cool,i wanna freestyle to but i got's no rymin skill's,but i get a kick outta readin em. :wave:

wait.....i just remembered one..hmm,hmmm

The night was dark
the sky was blue
and down the road
a shit truck flew
a bump was hit
a shot was heard
and(name)was hit
with a flyin turd!

i gots mad skills huh. :moon:
 
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J

Jam Master Jaco

it's pretty simple really, just know the basics
spit whatever pops into your head an face it
Rhyme it with a phone call but you're not tracin' it
about how much weed you smoke without lacin' it
or about how you're cooler then the rest
above all superior and nothing less, just don't stress
after you get going the rhymes are like a pest
every sentence wants to rhyme and you can't give it a rest
again with the cliche shit like "I'm pounding my chest"
Then post like every fuckin' day up in this nest
to be the self proclaimed coolest, the best
Yes that's me on dissing on I just jest
Hitfaced until I got "S" 'd, jokes with zest!
And uh...rhyming's easier if you face west
 

Blackstone

Member
It's time for Blackstone to get down and drop it
I never saw a cherry and not attempted to pop it
I'm gettin silly like Billy with a Phillie blunt
No it's not for smoking this one goes in your ****
Hittin an intern from the back would be preferential
Leaving stains in your blue dress, I'm presidential
If you can't get it out then bring it to the cleaners
This rhyme flow ain't smartass, it's pure genius
 

Artie Lange

Member
blunts in cunts?thats retarded and dirty
i aint stuck nuthin in a cunt since around 7:30
last night,afta a fast fight
i ripped a fat bitches ass in half ,aight
i dont shit my pants , dont wear depends
just smoked a ball of hash made from stems
i made some friends,by passin the doobie
3 hits of my shit you can see right thru me
 
(just saw this thread, i had to give it a go)

yo was up yall big vicious in the house
spittin rhymes like cee-lo and mouse
im reppin texas the big dirty dirty
where we drankin it up till six thirty
- in the morning the next day
then we be goin down to the bay
cause im reppin bayou city homie
all you fake ass bitches blow me
this is the north side, we all blue
allergic to the red, they dont got a clue
dont be half steppin in my hood
thats atasca south with the good
you just might hear my glock pop
bam nigga run run run dont stop
thats how we do it on the dirtythirdcoast
cause we the dirtiest city with the most
and we got candy paint on our drops
sooped up engines to outrun the cops
cause we be cruisin on the big five-nine
and no i aint gonna wanna do the time
if we get popped for smokin trees
while we ridin I-10 in our SUVs
man nigga then its gonna be crucial
imma miss sheezy's ice cream social
maybe i should just pop this popos head
naw i would rather sleep in my damn own bed
then a concrete tank with all them reds
while my homies over at jamies breakin bread
so imma pass the flow on to the next
cause i done showed how we do in Screwston, Tex

peace niggas

(editted for spelling - did not add anything) :joint:
 
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solrebl

Member
Fools wanna know how high
Can a man get
Without facing himself
Understand the words of a prophet
Without going into detail I mek' em face it!
Fools wanna diss a n***a with no assets.
Only need the blessings of His Highness!
Singing forever praises without fear or hatred!
On my way to the promised land,
Singing Jah Praises!

Praises. Yes I.
 

Blackstone

Member
what's up to the newest rhymer by the name of Saint Vicious
just like some dank nugs his rhymes are delicious
I'm settin off on another rhyme expedition
Just so I can talk some shit and act malicious
I'm the opposite of a saint, I'm unreligious
Speaking backwards in tongues like the devil was spittin this
I'm possessed, I need an exorcist, my evil is limitless
The dark side will take over and infect you like syphillis
 
What it do blackstone your flows are sick
i gave em a ten, cause all that shit is thick
but now its back down, to big terrible tex
come on homie bring your evil, bring that hex
cause my name is saint but its just a name
like doc dre aint a doctor, i aint that tame
come on man, lets break out the original haze
you know ill be tokin that shit for the rest of my days
so pop your trunk man, come on lets jam some screw
slow it down a bit and then them boys be through
talkin that mad malicious shit out their ass
cause i got a sexy white girl from boston mass
so you know i dont be fuckin with them dirty hoes
but dun worry, ill direct em over there to the bros
we all gonna get draped up and dripped out tonight
and lets hope the homies dont be startin a fight
cause tonight is the night for some serious lovin
my beds about to be as hot as a motherfuckin oven
come on my homies lets switch the flow a little bit
whoevers up next keep it hot while i take a hit
ill be back as soon as your shit is spit
be sure to keep that fuckin haze blunt lit

uuuhh yeaaa
 
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Blackstone

Member
No problem Vicious I'll keep the Haze burnin
and maybe some skunk, thai, northern lights and some durban
I'm just a white country boy tryin to spit some rhymes urban
I'm addicted to doing bong hits and drinkin fifths of bourbon
 
yo blackstone we wrecked this thread for sure
i guess we be the only niggas fuckin with the pure
none of these fakeys wanna step up their flow
come on spit a rhyme, if youre high it wont blow
we own this thread like scarface owns the south
we be spittin the fire with swishers in our mouth
whos gonna be the next biggity bitch to spit
come on down niggas and we'll get ya lit
 

Blackstone

Member
Vicious was a sinister saint who broke his halo
big mouth is to Blackstone like big booty is to J-Lo
Spittin rhymes that are putting all others to shame
As soon as I'm done I'm puttin the bud to this flame
 
J

Jam Master Jaco

Well tarnation! Lookee what we got here
Some black folk mesmerized like headlights to a deer
I was jus' sittin' pluckin' the banjo drinkin' beer
when wouldn't ya know it? my rhymes caught their ear
had to start gettin' me flustered with sneers
hear that? it's the sound of 1,000 cheers
"more white boyz" they says, rhymin' it high rez
as in resolution, I've got a solution
"white boys can't rap" is pollution, more insanity then a mental institution
cuz unless you came rappin' right out of the womb
you're shittalking yourself straight into your tomb
I drop bombs with capital "B"s sirs, Boom!

I tried to make it seem like I was a redenecks reflection
but I couldn't keep it up like an old man's erection
adrenaline flows through my veins like a hyper infection
my lines ease troubled pains cuz I flow with direction
I'm the self proclaimed coolest but don't give closer inspection
cuz I put myself up on this throne like a dictator's election

*edit* hmm, didn't flow too well, so I'll just ring this bell
dude you're getting a dell, that's pretty damn swell
Passion of the Christ is bloody due to Mel
Catholics think Jews should all burn in hell
actually I just pulled that out of my ass
came out right before my intestinal gas
I gotta think of something with correct syllables
to make my rhymes profit, not to mention billable
cuz it only gets choppy when the flows get sloppy
Hip hoppy don't stoppy inappropriate cherry poppy
brighter then the sun (i'm talking about intelligence)
dreams of fucking a nun (well now that's just irrelevance)
what does nun fucking have to with rap rhymes?
it's nothing like gun bucking and those stereotypical lines
rap is too much about the same old shit
fuckin' a bitch and sniffin' lines off her tit
if being rude is a hit then let's examine a clit
a journey that will delve straight into that pit
that's a tale for another time I too often rhyme
but this games a mountain that I will always climb
 
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its your boy Vicious, im back again
ive been makin noise in my bed since ten again
but she has school tomorrow so we had to stop
you know how it is, her grades cant drop
now its time to load up a bowl of this shit
imma smoke all ive got and get myself lit
i had to visit my boy jamie for that green
he has the best in town and that purple lean
ive been sippin on it since i got it at nine
now its twelve thirty and i couldnt walk a line
this is just how we live our life down here
smokin ganja, makin skrilla and drinkin a lot of beer
people might say we're all actin bad and gangster
but when it comes to it, our cars really go faster
we smoke all day, and we have drank in our cup
tryin to make extra cash to get more fucked up
cause i gotta pay them bills and keep my girl pleased
you know if she aint, i aint even gettin teased
so i spend my days on the streets in the hood
down in Houston Texas where we all got the good
 
what it do yall its vicious and i just woke up
gotta load my bowl and put somethin in my cup
imma rip these lines real slow like this
i gotta stay on beat now - dont miss
nothin like a good sativa - wake and bake
gettin me toasted before i go - to the lake
so ill take my leave now and smoke a quick bud
dont worry ill be back to grind your face in the mud

:wave: :joint:
 

Blackstone

Member
(not really a freestyle, just something I wrote down)

I think that those weed plants growing in my basement
might attract the Federal Bureau of Investigation
they think a harmless herb will destroy our nation
but nobody considers the tax dollars they’re wastin’
I don’t know what to call it but it ain’t civilization
when they legalize the herb I’ll give a standing ovation
this rhyme is just to vent my aggravation and frustration
the creation known as cannabis should be grown on plantations
from the Canadians up north to the islands of the Haitians
I’m running out of rhymes cuz my mind is spacin’
but the herb will give you a good sensation
as well as salvation and good vibrations
I’m dazed and confused or is it confused and dazin’?
 
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