YukonKronic
Active member
Are you ready? I think your gonna have some nice tops there...
Zamaldelica (fairy tale or horror story?)
- Thread starter smilley
- Start date
Johnnyseed
Active member
Good toilet read
The Story Continues
The Story Continues
Later in the week, smilley heard a rapping on the front door of the hovel. When he opened the door he saw his friend Jojo and his nephew, Bubs smiling back at him. “Hi ya, smilley” said Jojo. Happy to see his friend Jojo and his nephew, smilley invited them in and called to his wife. When Mrs smilley came into the room, Jojo introduced his nephew to the beautiful lady and told them that Bubs had come up with a plan to fill the freezer with pork and put an end to the Fudd brothers plant ripping. Happy to hear some good news for a change, she said to smilley “break out the Blueberry hash smilley, we must show our guests some real hospitality”. Smilley loved his hash and loved to share it with friends. “First I’ll mix up a round of rums for them and then roll up some spliffs, oh, and a whiskey for you darlin.”
The four of them drank and smoked hash reefers and caught up on all the developments regarding the break in and the Fudd brothers. Jojo told smilley about his exploits and all the houses he didn’t blow in. Smilley showed Bubs the zammies and Bubs nodded approvingly and smiled lovingly at the ladies. “Good job” he said “you’re gonna love smokin’ them once they’re bagged and cured, smilley”.
Bubs told Mrs smilley that he disliked the Fudd brothers immensely. They were cutting into his bean business by selling their inferior clones and he had a plan to put them out of business and help her fill the freezer with pork. He asked smilley if he could show him the Fudd brother's house. Smilley replied "sure, we'll get gorilla ganja to guide us there the stealthy way and we won't be seen. I'll bring my travelling bong and we can get good and ripped along the way. We can go tomorrow..."
The 4 friends drank and toked and laughed late into the evening, telling each other taller and taller tales till it was time to retire. They wanted a good night's sleep so Bubs could do a proper reconnoiter of the Fudd brothers place.
The Story Continues
Later in the week, smilley heard a rapping on the front door of the hovel. When he opened the door he saw his friend Jojo and his nephew, Bubs smiling back at him. “Hi ya, smilley” said Jojo. Happy to see his friend Jojo and his nephew, smilley invited them in and called to his wife. When Mrs smilley came into the room, Jojo introduced his nephew to the beautiful lady and told them that Bubs had come up with a plan to fill the freezer with pork and put an end to the Fudd brothers plant ripping. Happy to hear some good news for a change, she said to smilley “break out the Blueberry hash smilley, we must show our guests some real hospitality”. Smilley loved his hash and loved to share it with friends. “First I’ll mix up a round of rums for them and then roll up some spliffs, oh, and a whiskey for you darlin.”
The four of them drank and smoked hash reefers and caught up on all the developments regarding the break in and the Fudd brothers. Jojo told smilley about his exploits and all the houses he didn’t blow in. Smilley showed Bubs the zammies and Bubs nodded approvingly and smiled lovingly at the ladies. “Good job” he said “you’re gonna love smokin’ them once they’re bagged and cured, smilley”.
Bubs told Mrs smilley that he disliked the Fudd brothers immensely. They were cutting into his bean business by selling their inferior clones and he had a plan to put them out of business and help her fill the freezer with pork. He asked smilley if he could show him the Fudd brother's house. Smilley replied "sure, we'll get gorilla ganja to guide us there the stealthy way and we won't be seen. I'll bring my travelling bong and we can get good and ripped along the way. We can go tomorrow..."
The 4 friends drank and toked and laughed late into the evening, telling each other taller and taller tales till it was time to retire. They wanted a good night's sleep so Bubs could do a proper reconnoiter of the Fudd brothers place.
That weed looks like a handful, heh,heh....
Kushy Clones Day F46
They're fattening up, despite my rough abuse. They should finish about 75 days, maybe a little quicker with the 11/13 light cycle.
The Story Continues
The Story Continues
Next morning, smilley, Bubs and Jojo were over at gorilla ganja's place having coffee and smoking gg's auto buds. Bubs and gg had an in-depth discussion about growing autos in the great white north. Jojo and smilley listened intently but left the topic to the adults in the room. When the coffee was done and the reefers were smoked, smilley loaded his travelling bong with some of his patented Hawaiian Snow Diesel and gorilla ganja led them on the stealthy journey to the Fudd brother's house.
Up on the same ridge where gg and smilley had sat weeks ago they had an excellent view of The Fudd brothers place and the surrounding area. Bubs started making notes in a little book he had brought with him. He then asked gorilla ganja to guide him all the way around the property without being seen. Jojo and smilley sat up on the ridge smoking weed and watching for activity from the brick house and the road passing in front of it. It was all quiet at the Fudd brothers place. Bubs and gg returned to the ridge where smilley and Jojo sat. Bubs said “I have a plan, we’ll need a little help but when we’re done the Fudd brothers will be out of business and never bother anyone ever again.” They headed back to gg’s place to plot strategy, smoke weed and have some cocktails.
Back at gorilla ganja’s place smilley asked Bubs what the plan was. “Jojo is going to blow in the Fudd brothers house with them inside.” declared Bubs. “But I can’t really blow in houses” protested Jojo. “You can if we place a thousand pounds of explosive under the house” said Bubs with a big smile on his face. “We’ll need an explosive expert” added Bubs. “I know just the guy” said smilley. “My buddy Koondense used to blow stumps out of the ground on his father’s farm when we were kids”. Bubs went on “We can tunnel from the storm sewer running by the house, it looks to be about 20 feet away. Anybody know a good tunneller?” asked Bubs. Gorilla ganja suggested Swamp Thang. “He can dig through anything and besides, he’s gotta be tired of pulling Elly Mae’s critters around wearing a pink tutu.” “He has to wear the tutu for this operation” said Bubs. “How come?” asked Jojo. “He doesn’t really have to” said Bubs “It’ll keep everyone entertained and I just like to fuck with people’s heads” laughed Bubs. “We’ll need a few more volunteers but with a little hard work and plenty of reefers we can get the tunnel dug, the explosives in place and the detonator switch connected a safe distance from the blast zone without those pigs knowing anything about it.”
The Story Continues
Next morning, smilley, Bubs and Jojo were over at gorilla ganja's place having coffee and smoking gg's auto buds. Bubs and gg had an in-depth discussion about growing autos in the great white north. Jojo and smilley listened intently but left the topic to the adults in the room. When the coffee was done and the reefers were smoked, smilley loaded his travelling bong with some of his patented Hawaiian Snow Diesel and gorilla ganja led them on the stealthy journey to the Fudd brother's house.
Up on the same ridge where gg and smilley had sat weeks ago they had an excellent view of The Fudd brothers place and the surrounding area. Bubs started making notes in a little book he had brought with him. He then asked gorilla ganja to guide him all the way around the property without being seen. Jojo and smilley sat up on the ridge smoking weed and watching for activity from the brick house and the road passing in front of it. It was all quiet at the Fudd brothers place. Bubs and gg returned to the ridge where smilley and Jojo sat. Bubs said “I have a plan, we’ll need a little help but when we’re done the Fudd brothers will be out of business and never bother anyone ever again.” They headed back to gg’s place to plot strategy, smoke weed and have some cocktails.
Back at gorilla ganja’s place smilley asked Bubs what the plan was. “Jojo is going to blow in the Fudd brothers house with them inside.” declared Bubs. “But I can’t really blow in houses” protested Jojo. “You can if we place a thousand pounds of explosive under the house” said Bubs with a big smile on his face. “We’ll need an explosive expert” added Bubs. “I know just the guy” said smilley. “My buddy Koondense used to blow stumps out of the ground on his father’s farm when we were kids”. Bubs went on “We can tunnel from the storm sewer running by the house, it looks to be about 20 feet away. Anybody know a good tunneller?” asked Bubs. Gorilla ganja suggested Swamp Thang. “He can dig through anything and besides, he’s gotta be tired of pulling Elly Mae’s critters around wearing a pink tutu.” “He has to wear the tutu for this operation” said Bubs. “How come?” asked Jojo. “He doesn’t really have to” said Bubs “It’ll keep everyone entertained and I just like to fuck with people’s heads” laughed Bubs. “We’ll need a few more volunteers but with a little hard work and plenty of reefers we can get the tunnel dug, the explosives in place and the detonator switch connected a safe distance from the blast zone without those pigs knowing anything about it.”
bacon is a mighty powerful motivator
Heh, heh... Looks like we have our first volunteer for the tunnelling crew. Maybe swamp thang has an extra tutu for you, vcasqui. I hope your not a "ripper lovin' vegetarian?
I went thru all the history this morning. The first pages are very funny! I laughed quite a bit for sure. It was a good reading, very original 
I have a couple of doubts tho: a) How did the beautifull Mrs. Smiley adquire the ability to hear the zammies without the need of translation from the kushy clones? b) I thought that Swamp Thang and Elly were imaginary creatures from the Big BOOBS. Is Big BOOBS a magical book that can give life to the characters inside of it? Is it a collection of real histories from the residents of "this world"? I'm interested in Big BOOBS.
I'm for sure not a "ripper lovin' vegetarian. It's true that the Fudd brothers did bad when they broke into your temple, but c'mon; first Bubs sold them shitty clones(probably for a high amount of cash), then they were threathen by JoJo and Mrs.Smiley… it seems like they don't have an easy life
I think Bubs is an asshole and a bad influence for you. His acts are motivated only by his own interests. He looks like a business wolf. I wouldn't be surprissed if he blows the tunnel with all of you guys inside and then steal your zammies. Hell, he probably thinks that the plants are his anyways, since he gave you the seeds. Never trust an above average IQ wolf.
I would gladly accept the tutu and I wouldn't say no to a nice slice of bacon, but I don't trust Bubs…
--------------------------------------
Btw, regarding nutrients: Do you have nice airflow in your rooms? I think I didn't see any fans in the pictures? it is said for some that the plants need enough "wind" to be able to move nutrients in the leaves. I really don't know if it's true or not… but just in case
I have a couple of doubts tho: a) How did the beautifull Mrs. Smiley adquire the ability to hear the zammies without the need of translation from the kushy clones? b) I thought that Swamp Thang and Elly were imaginary creatures from the Big BOOBS. Is Big BOOBS a magical book that can give life to the characters inside of it? Is it a collection of real histories from the residents of "this world"? I'm interested in Big BOOBS.
I'm for sure not a "ripper lovin' vegetarian. It's true that the Fudd brothers did bad when they broke into your temple, but c'mon; first Bubs sold them shitty clones(probably for a high amount of cash), then they were threathen by JoJo and Mrs.Smiley… it seems like they don't have an easy life
I think Bubs is an asshole and a bad influence for you. His acts are motivated only by his own interests. He looks like a business wolf. I wouldn't be surprissed if he blows the tunnel with all of you guys inside and then steal your zammies. Hell, he probably thinks that the plants are his anyways, since he gave you the seeds. Never trust an above average IQ wolf.
I would gladly accept the tutu and I wouldn't say no to a nice slice of bacon, but I don't trust Bubs…
--------------------------------------
Btw, regarding nutrients: Do you have nice airflow in your rooms? I think I didn't see any fans in the pictures? it is said for some that the plants need enough "wind" to be able to move nutrients in the leaves. I really don't know if it's true or not… but just in case
I went thru all the history this morning. The first pages are very funny! I laughed quite a bit for sure. It was a good reading, very original
I have a couple of doubts tho: a) How did the beautifull Mrs. Smiley adquire the ability to hear the zammies without the need of translation from the kushy clones? b) I thought that Swamp Thang and Elly were imaginary creatures from the Big BOOBS. Is Big BOOBS a magical book that can give life to the characters inside of it? Is it a collection of real histories from the residents of "this world"? I'm interested in Big BOOBS.
I'm for sure not a "ripper lovin' vegetarian. It's true that the Fudd brothers did bad when they broke into your temple, but c'mon; first Bubs sold them shitty clones(probably for a high amount of cash), then they were threathen by JoJo and Mrs.Smiley… it seems like they don't have an easy life
I think Bubs is an asshole and a bad influence for you. His acts are motivated only by his own interests. He looks like a business wolf. I wouldn't be surprissed if he blows the tunnel with all of you guys inside and then steal your zammies. Hell, he probably thinks that the plants are his anyways, since he gave you the seeds. Never trust an above average IQ wolf.
I would gladly accept the tutu and I wouldn't say no to a nice slice of bacon, but I don't trust Bubs…
--------------------------------------
When I read your post to Mrs smilley, we laughed harder than we have in weeks. Good one and thanks for that.
Finally, someone is asking the tough questions. Don’t you other people get any ideas. You don’t want my head to explode, do you?
Ok, I”ll address your issues in order...
a) The zammies and the kushy clones communicate telepathically with the characters as neither has lips to speak with. I’ve conducted numerous studies into this matter and I can definitively say that one’s ability to communicate with a cannabis plant is directly proportional to one’s cannabis consumption. That being said, the zammies come from magic beans and I can have a deep intellectual discussion with them even without a toke. Just the other day, I told them I saw a lady talking to her cat. We laughed and laughed.
b) Big BOOBS is meant to be an allegory or should I say a book of stories that can be interpreted to reveal a hidden meaning, typically a moral or political one. One could also interpret it as a spiritual or quantum alternative reality where things, characters or history can interact with the current reality. Me, I just like saying Big BOOBS, seeing Big BOOBS, touching Big BOOBS and even typing Big BOOBS.
The Fudd brothers were intended to be a symbolic persona for which the characters could rally against. Sort of the typical battle between good and evil. Except, the characters in this story are no democratic do-gooders. They’re all pork lovers and they’re actions are driven by hunger, indignation and self gratification. And they do it all in an intoxicated state of cannabis inebriation and at times an alcoholic induced haze. All this taken into consideration – Fudd brothers, BAD, everybody else, GOOD.
Bubs. What can I tell you about Bubs? Bubs is Jojo’s nephew. About 30 years ago he moved out West here to live with his uncle Jojo and I picked him up at the airport and smoked with him the first joint he’d ever had. When he told me that about 10 years ago I’ve felt guilty ever since. I can’t help thinking that I’m responsible for fucking up his life. I wanted to introduce him as a character, I guess to ease my guilt. I’ve done a shitty job of it if people think he’s an asshole. He really is a good guy in real life and I’ll do my best to rehabilitate his character. Point taken. Ok everybody – Bubs Good.
It’s a deal vcasqui, you’re the chief peon on the tunnelling crew. I have a beautiful tutu picked out for you. You won’t have to talk to Bubs, you’ll take your orders from Swamp Thang and if things go good, you’ll be invited to the Great Pork BBQ at the end of the story unless the tunnel collapses while you’re digging it.
The Story Continues
The Story Continues
Smilley put the word out to his friends and after a few days they started to arrive at his community. Swamp thang told Elly Mae that he had a tunnelling job to go to. Elly said “shucks Swamp Thang, your the best wagon puller I ever had”. “I’ll be back in a few weeks, Elly. My friends are running out of pork and I want to help them fill their freezer” replied swamp thang. “In that case, take my gophers with you, they can tunnel better than most critters.” And with that, 6 furry little gophers climbed up swamp thang’s body and jumped into his backpack. “See you soon Elly...” and swamp thang was off to smilley’s community.
Koondense was excited, he hadn’t blown up anything in a while and he really wanted to make a big explosion. He had some primacord, some C4, a few sticks of dynamite, a bunch of blasting caps and an explosive switch with reams of detonating wire for remote activation. He also had a big bag of OAX/PAN, a silly grin on his face and a little roach hanging from the corner of his mouth. Koondense was ready...
As the creatures were arriving, there was a big “WHUMP” of a noise, a puff of smoke and an odd little fella named vcasqui appeared amidst them. “Where am I? What happened?” exclaimed vcasqui, totally disoriented and befuddled. "You’ve been drafted into smilley’s army of misfits” declared Jojo. “Smilley told us you were coming and insisted I give you this..” Jojo handed vcasqui a small bag containing a stunning blue tutu. Swamp Thang came up to him and said “it’s your tunnelling tutu, it matches the color of smilley’s wife's eyes. Vcasqui was looking a little off balance so YukonKronic came up to him shoved a reefer into his yap and said “here, try some of this jungle trip shit, heh, heh, it’ll put you in a better frame of mind”. Vcasqui shoved a reefer of Bangi Haze into Yukon’s face and a smoke-off ensued. Soon vcasqui was as fucked up as the other critters and Swamp Thang nodded to himself and thought the odd little fella was gonna work out ok after all.
The Story Continues
Smilley put the word out to his friends and after a few days they started to arrive at his community. Swamp thang told Elly Mae that he had a tunnelling job to go to. Elly said “shucks Swamp Thang, your the best wagon puller I ever had”. “I’ll be back in a few weeks, Elly. My friends are running out of pork and I want to help them fill their freezer” replied swamp thang. “In that case, take my gophers with you, they can tunnel better than most critters.” And with that, 6 furry little gophers climbed up swamp thang’s body and jumped into his backpack. “See you soon Elly...” and swamp thang was off to smilley’s community.
Koondense was excited, he hadn’t blown up anything in a while and he really wanted to make a big explosion. He had some primacord, some C4, a few sticks of dynamite, a bunch of blasting caps and an explosive switch with reams of detonating wire for remote activation. He also had a big bag of OAX/PAN, a silly grin on his face and a little roach hanging from the corner of his mouth. Koondense was ready...
As the creatures were arriving, there was a big “WHUMP” of a noise, a puff of smoke and an odd little fella named vcasqui appeared amidst them. “Where am I? What happened?” exclaimed vcasqui, totally disoriented and befuddled. "You’ve been drafted into smilley’s army of misfits” declared Jojo. “Smilley told us you were coming and insisted I give you this..” Jojo handed vcasqui a small bag containing a stunning blue tutu. Swamp Thang came up to him and said “it’s your tunnelling tutu, it matches the color of smilley’s wife's eyes. Vcasqui was looking a little off balance so YukonKronic came up to him shoved a reefer into his yap and said “here, try some of this jungle trip shit, heh, heh, it’ll put you in a better frame of mind”. Vcasqui shoved a reefer of Bangi Haze into Yukon’s face and a smoke-off ensued. Soon vcasqui was as fucked up as the other critters and Swamp Thang nodded to himself and thought the odd little fella was gonna work out ok after all.
The Story Continues
The Story Continues
Meanwhile, Bubs and gorilla ganja had found an access point to the storm sewer which was well concealed and far from the view of the Fudd brother’s place. When they climbed down the ladder into the concrete sewer, Bubs noted it was tall enough to stand up in and bone-dry. “This’ll be perfect” he thought to himself and commenced to do a series of complex calculations in his head and after a few minutes declared that the Fudd brothers house was 623 feet along the sewer line and to the left. As they walked along the sewer line. Bubs carefully measured their progress while gg payed out a string of led lights which he hung from the ceiling with self adhesive hooks. When they had gone the appropriate distance, Bubs said “this is it” and put a big X on the side of the sewer line with a bright orange spray bomb. “How are we gonna get through the concrete wall of the sewer line?” asked gorilla ganja. “It’s gotta be 4 inches thick" he said. “I’m not sure” replied Bubs “I’ll discuss it with Koodense and see if he has any ideas”. With that, the two creatures retraced their route and worked their way back to the gathering by smilley’s hovel.
Back at the gathering, tents, motorhomes and travel trailers had been set up and still more of smilley’s friends were showing up. Deepwaterdude had arrived, along with Dropped Cat, White Beard, SolarLogos, mycillium and Cvh. Primobud showed up with his God Bud and plenty of infused fudge. Brickweeder, Common Sense, Consolidated and DNM1 were wandering around, dreaming of pork and smoking vast quantities of sativa. All of the usual suspects were gathered together (if I missed anybody, just add a post, I’m still looking for tunnellers). Some had come for the impromptu smoke-in, some had come for a taste of Mrs smilley’s pork cooking, some had come because they had an axe to grind with the Fudd brothers and some had just come because it appeared to be a fun place to hang out with a bunch of good people.
It should be noted that there was no shortage of food, just pork. Bbq’s were sizzling all around the gathering. One could smell beef cooking, bison, moose and elk. There was chicken, goose and partridge. Plenty of fish and sea food. Just no pork. There wasn’t a pulled pork sandwich for miles. Bacon was but a distant memory and ham hadn’t been available for weeks. Smilley was at his wits end. He lived for pork and with each passing day, a little of him was slipping away slowly. He’d even stopped laughing at the zammie’s indica jokes. He was happy that his friends were rallying around him to aid in his quest for pork. And, he knows, as Emeril Lagasse knows, Pork Fat Rules........
Bonus Link https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8dxpMxULHnA
The Story Continues
Meanwhile, Bubs and gorilla ganja had found an access point to the storm sewer which was well concealed and far from the view of the Fudd brother’s place. When they climbed down the ladder into the concrete sewer, Bubs noted it was tall enough to stand up in and bone-dry. “This’ll be perfect” he thought to himself and commenced to do a series of complex calculations in his head and after a few minutes declared that the Fudd brothers house was 623 feet along the sewer line and to the left. As they walked along the sewer line. Bubs carefully measured their progress while gg payed out a string of led lights which he hung from the ceiling with self adhesive hooks. When they had gone the appropriate distance, Bubs said “this is it” and put a big X on the side of the sewer line with a bright orange spray bomb. “How are we gonna get through the concrete wall of the sewer line?” asked gorilla ganja. “It’s gotta be 4 inches thick" he said. “I’m not sure” replied Bubs “I’ll discuss it with Koodense and see if he has any ideas”. With that, the two creatures retraced their route and worked their way back to the gathering by smilley’s hovel.
Back at the gathering, tents, motorhomes and travel trailers had been set up and still more of smilley’s friends were showing up. Deepwaterdude had arrived, along with Dropped Cat, White Beard, SolarLogos, mycillium and Cvh. Primobud showed up with his God Bud and plenty of infused fudge. Brickweeder, Common Sense, Consolidated and DNM1 were wandering around, dreaming of pork and smoking vast quantities of sativa. All of the usual suspects were gathered together (if I missed anybody, just add a post, I’m still looking for tunnellers). Some had come for the impromptu smoke-in, some had come for a taste of Mrs smilley’s pork cooking, some had come because they had an axe to grind with the Fudd brothers and some had just come because it appeared to be a fun place to hang out with a bunch of good people.
It should be noted that there was no shortage of food, just pork. Bbq’s were sizzling all around the gathering. One could smell beef cooking, bison, moose and elk. There was chicken, goose and partridge. Plenty of fish and sea food. Just no pork. There wasn’t a pulled pork sandwich for miles. Bacon was but a distant memory and ham hadn’t been available for weeks. Smilley was at his wits end. He lived for pork and with each passing day, a little of him was slipping away slowly. He’d even stopped laughing at the zammie’s indica jokes. He was happy that his friends were rallying around him to aid in his quest for pork. And, he knows, as Emeril Lagasse knows, Pork Fat Rules........
Bonus Link https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8dxpMxULHnA
D
DNM1
"Brickweeder, Common Sense, Consolidated and DNM1 were wandering around, dreaming of pork and smoking vast quantities of sativa"
We have an idea floating around
If tunnellers are going to be wearing tutus,when digging,we are setting up a Dry Cleaning Tutu Service,so you can all turn up at work looking "smart"
CS suggested we call it BIG BOOBS
YukonKronic
Active member
YukonKronic brought some gold fever! One look at the gravels in that tunnel will tell me if we ought to pan some... maybe this little crew can make a buck or two while we dig!
I mean hell... you don’t even have to thaw permafrost to scrape gravel for spring sluicing season! This here is EASY mining!
Besides... the black sand in pay gravel is a good soil amendment...
And in the spirit of the Klondike I’m going to start getting the tutu crew to practice a little can can girls routine for the pork bbq celebrations at the end of this adventure! Gertie will spit her diamond tooth if a Klondike boy doesn’t show you cheechakos how to can can after digging in a tunnel all day! It really is the best way to stretch out cramped backs and legs....
I mean hell... you don’t even have to thaw permafrost to scrape gravel for spring sluicing season! This here is EASY mining!
Besides... the black sand in pay gravel is a good soil amendment...
And in the spirit of the Klondike I’m going to start getting the tutu crew to practice a little can can girls routine for the pork bbq celebrations at the end of this adventure! Gertie will spit her diamond tooth if a Klondike boy doesn’t show you cheechakos how to can can after digging in a tunnel all day! It really is the best way to stretch out cramped backs and legs....
The Story Continues
The Story Continues
Later on, Koondense and Bubs were down in the storm sewer examining the wall where they needed to punch through. Bubs started telling Koondense how much primacord he would need and what kind of shaped charge he would require till Koondense stopped him. “I’m an artiste, Bubs. You wouldn’t tell a painter what colors to use or a sculptor what kind of marble to select. Now, get the fuck outta here and let me create a masterpiece.” Bubs shrugged, and laid out the detonating wires as he headed back to the sewer entrance. Koondense went right to work and planted his explosives much like a skilled surgeon doing a complex operation. After several hours of intense concentration and considerable sweating he stood back and admired his work. “Perfect!!!” he exclaimed to himself. He finished off the the wiring connections, smiled to himself and proceeded to the sewer entrance, carefully rearranging the detonator wires as he retreated.
When Koondense exited the sewer, Bubs asked him what took so long. “No one asked Michelangelo why the Chapel ceiling was taking so long...” answered Koondense. “You’ve gotta lighten up, Bubs”. Then they sat and smoked a big spliff and discussed the upcoming blast. “We’ll have to wait till the pigs are out of the house” said Bubs. “Yup, it’s gonna make a bit of noise and shake the ground pretty good” answered Koondense. “We sure don’t want to tip them off to our plan”. They decided to run more detonator wire up to the ridge where they could observe the house and the comings and goings of Elmer and Porky.
A few reefers later, they saw the two pigs exiting the house. They each had a box of clones under their arms. “Must be making a delivery...” Bubs said to Koondense. As Bubs watched the two pigs scamper down the road, Koondense hurriedly connected the wires to the detonator switch. When Elmer and Porky had disappeared off in the distance, Koon and Bubs both looked at each other, nodded and smiled. Koondense pushed the plunger down and nothing happened. Bubs thought to himself that his friend had screwed up somehow and then he heard it... It started as a low rumble, like thunder off in the distance and culminated in a loud BOOM. They saw the ground in front of the Fudd brother’s house shake and a layer of dust rise from the road surface and hover there for a few moments.
Koondense had a grin on his face from ear to ear, he looked at Bubs and said “this is almost as good as sex”. It was at that exact moment that Bubs realized that Koondense was totally bat-shit crazy. They let the dust settle in the storm sewer and activated a blower fan to exhaust the smoke from the passageway. When they got down to the blast site, Bubs gazed upon it with awe and amazement. Not only had Koondense made an opening in the concrete wall, he had done it in such a way as the opening resembled a giant cannabis fan leaf. “You truly are an artist” said Bubs. “You’re still a crazy muthafuker, but good job man!!.” Koondense said nothing, he just kept grinning and admiring his work.
Seeing that the site was ready for tunnelling to begin, the two characters headed back to the gathering to let Swamp Thang know.
The Story Continues
Later on, Koondense and Bubs were down in the storm sewer examining the wall where they needed to punch through. Bubs started telling Koondense how much primacord he would need and what kind of shaped charge he would require till Koondense stopped him. “I’m an artiste, Bubs. You wouldn’t tell a painter what colors to use or a sculptor what kind of marble to select. Now, get the fuck outta here and let me create a masterpiece.” Bubs shrugged, and laid out the detonating wires as he headed back to the sewer entrance. Koondense went right to work and planted his explosives much like a skilled surgeon doing a complex operation. After several hours of intense concentration and considerable sweating he stood back and admired his work. “Perfect!!!” he exclaimed to himself. He finished off the the wiring connections, smiled to himself and proceeded to the sewer entrance, carefully rearranging the detonator wires as he retreated.
When Koondense exited the sewer, Bubs asked him what took so long. “No one asked Michelangelo why the Chapel ceiling was taking so long...” answered Koondense. “You’ve gotta lighten up, Bubs”. Then they sat and smoked a big spliff and discussed the upcoming blast. “We’ll have to wait till the pigs are out of the house” said Bubs. “Yup, it’s gonna make a bit of noise and shake the ground pretty good” answered Koondense. “We sure don’t want to tip them off to our plan”. They decided to run more detonator wire up to the ridge where they could observe the house and the comings and goings of Elmer and Porky.
A few reefers later, they saw the two pigs exiting the house. They each had a box of clones under their arms. “Must be making a delivery...” Bubs said to Koondense. As Bubs watched the two pigs scamper down the road, Koondense hurriedly connected the wires to the detonator switch. When Elmer and Porky had disappeared off in the distance, Koon and Bubs both looked at each other, nodded and smiled. Koondense pushed the plunger down and nothing happened. Bubs thought to himself that his friend had screwed up somehow and then he heard it... It started as a low rumble, like thunder off in the distance and culminated in a loud BOOM. They saw the ground in front of the Fudd brother’s house shake and a layer of dust rise from the road surface and hover there for a few moments.
Koondense had a grin on his face from ear to ear, he looked at Bubs and said “this is almost as good as sex”. It was at that exact moment that Bubs realized that Koondense was totally bat-shit crazy. They let the dust settle in the storm sewer and activated a blower fan to exhaust the smoke from the passageway. When they got down to the blast site, Bubs gazed upon it with awe and amazement. Not only had Koondense made an opening in the concrete wall, he had done it in such a way as the opening resembled a giant cannabis fan leaf. “You truly are an artist” said Bubs. “You’re still a crazy muthafuker, but good job man!!.” Koondense said nothing, he just kept grinning and admiring his work.
Seeing that the site was ready for tunnelling to begin, the two characters headed back to the gathering to let Swamp Thang know.
