He was a middle aged virgin...
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The Original O'l Farts Club.
- Thread starter Putembk
- Start date
Watermelon is good at any time IMO.I bought a 12 pound watermelon.It’s already half gone in a day …probably not a good idea at 10 at night though… all that
Except for this late, you'll probably be up peeing all night!
LOL at 'this late' being 10 o'clock.
I remember when the party didn't even start til now
105F today at 4:00 and we were eating on the patio at Fresh Agave. LOL We were the only ones eating outside. Every time someone would walk out of the restaurant, they would look at us and say, "Wow, aren't you hot out here?"
After about the fifth one saying that, I started beating them to the point by saying, "Wow, weren't you cold in there?" LOL
The misters bring it way down to probably 102F or less. LOL
Gotta luv the desert.
After about the fifth one saying that, I started beating them to the point by saying, "Wow, weren't you cold in there?" LOL
The misters bring it way down to probably 102F or less. LOL
Gotta luv the desert.
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Damm dats seriousStill over 80 here...........least its a dry heat like the fires of hell.
Should cool off again tomorrow and get back into the 60's for fucks sakes.........double plural entendres bitches.
Skipped fourth and dropped out in fifth..........BAM!
Yes Mam !
with a bad hand
I believe the word fuck is an acronym meaning -
Fornicating
Under
Command of the
King.
Years ago my sister rented her house to our cousin. He paid rent the first 2 months and then just stopped. I guess he decided it was as much his as it was hers because they were related. 6 months later my dad handed him an eviction notice. The poor dumb bastard looked like he had been drop kicked into the outhouse.
Once I was out drinking with some friends at 2 am on the back roads when one guy had to poop. It was summer and the roadside was covered with thistles and poison ivy so he crapped in the middle of a crossroads. The only thing he had to wipe his butt with was a $ 20 dollar bill. It was the smallest thing he had.While living in FL, out drinking one night, we decided to go get a bag of weed.
Along some road, we pulled over so I could pee.
Being a bit tipsy, I fell backwards into on of those basitd cactus's.
Yeah, my night out was over. They were in my back and ass.
I couldn't even sit down in the car, I road facing backwards on my
knees. It hurt so bad just to pull my pants up. Even drunk, I wanted
to cry.
Took my roomie over an hour just to pull all those fucking spikes out.
Then I sat in a cool bathtub and passed out after the ordeal.
Moral of the story:
Don't get drunk and piss on the roadside in FL
Anyway, he left it sticking out of the top of this pile of crap in the middle of a 4 way.
Over the years I have often wondered how long that $ 20 dollar bill sat there before someone picked it up and stuck it in their pocket.
This will be the best day of my life! Why you ask ? Because I have decided to make it so ! Plan like you will live forever but live today like it is your last. 
Hello - Good Morn'in - and welcome 
- Hmmmm I wonder where the conversation will go today - a bright sunshiny day - by the looks of it 
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Let's have no Summertime Blues - or maybe we should?
Ahh - here is the original version of Summertime Blues - by Eddie Cochran - (1959)
- Hmmmm I wonder where the conversation will go today - a bright sunshiny day - by the looks of it -Let's have no Summertime Blues - or maybe we should?
Ahh - here is the original version of Summertime Blues - by Eddie Cochran - (1959)
Good morning brothers and sisters!
Yet another double gorgeous day starting at 55F and predicted to reach 83F.
The housekeepers postponed cleaning day from last Wednesday to today, to avoid Rose Festival Parade traffic, so me and Miss Layla will start this morning on an upbeat note by spending quality time at Fernhill dog park sniffing butts and chasing balls.
Yet another double gorgeous day starting at 55F and predicted to reach 83F.
The housekeepers postponed cleaning day from last Wednesday to today, to avoid Rose Festival Parade traffic, so me and Miss Layla will start this morning on an upbeat note by spending quality time at Fernhill dog park sniffing butts and chasing balls.
I picked the Jeep up on the third day of a one-day turnaround to address two factory recalls, and in addition to taking longer than estimated, they tried to upsell me by telling me that based on my 140K mileage, my fluids need replacing, my serpentine belt is showing excessive wear, and I need new sparkplugs. I asked if they checked the condition or if they were just going by milage and was told they checked.
As they quoted $298 just to replace the serpentine belt and the rest of the prices were about equally absurd, I declined and checked out the serpentine belt when I got home. We just recently bought the car used, but as I remembered correctly, the belt was virtually new and I the transmission fluid is still bright and clear with good smells, as it was when I checked it out before buying it. I haven't checked the differentials but I'm pretty sure they didn't even bother to check either, just automatically went for my throat and wallet.
As they quoted $298 just to replace the serpentine belt and the rest of the prices were about equally absurd, I declined and checked out the serpentine belt when I got home. We just recently bought the car used, but as I remembered correctly, the belt was virtually new and I the transmission fluid is still bright and clear with good smells, as it was when I checked it out before buying it. I haven't checked the differentials but I'm pretty sure they didn't even bother to check either, just automatically went for my throat and wallet.
Kevlar is so old school! The quoted me the new diamond dust coating, which is oh so much better, though more costly, and for just a little more, they throw in a new limited car warranty.
oldfogey8
Well-known member
I went with the moscovium undercoating. I figure aliens from around the galaxy can’t be wrong and being able to fold the space-time fabric to cut down on the time it takes to get to the liquor store is pretty sweet.
oldfogey8
Well-known member
Zig is great with other dogs though I can’t take any credit. I think the family that had him before we adopted him did a good job with that. Even dogs acting hostile towards him get his puppy dance. He got bit a few weeks ago, shrugged it off and ran off to play with a couple of other friendly dogs. I got lucky with Zig.
' Darn puppy dance ain't doing its magic like it used to - got bit on the nose dammit!' -
