Zamaldelica (fairy tale or horror story?)
- Thread starter smilley
- Start date
The Story Continues
The Story Continues
While smilley waited for his gorgeous wife to return home, he sat in his grow room thinking to himself “These little zammies are looking better and better. For only 14 days of veg they look pretty darn good. They’re vigorous, healthy and working on their 4th nodes. One is a little smaller but she popped on the 3rd day of germ while the other 3 popped on day 2.” He decided to wait till the main stem was clear of the 3rd node before topping. Then he would consult the oracle poll as to where to top them. “Grow little zammies, grow.......”
When Jojo and Mrs smilley finally arrived at her residence they entered smilley’s grow room as he was finishing cleaning up in preparation of the season’s final crop. Mrs smilley introduced her new friend to her husband explaining about the new kushy clones and the BLT feast she was going to prepare in exchange for said clones. “...you repot those clones, smilley, clean em up and then tie them mothers down.” Then, she hastily raced off to the kitchen to prepare the bacon extravaganza.
After exchanging fist-bumps in greeting, which was the custom of the time, smilley thought to himself “my, what big ears and big eyes he has, he sure looks familiar”. Smilley asked “have we met?”. Sniffing at smilley’s crotch, the wolf replied “I don’t think so, and I seldom forget a scent”. Smiling uncertainly, smilley commenced to repotting the new clones, carefully cleaning up the road weary plants and giving them a healthy dose of humus and nutrients.
Snipping and tying the clones, smilley quickly had them looking respectable and comfortably vegging under the tuned spectrum led. He gauged how much more veg they could take without outgrowing the little secondary room’s ceiling. “A week, maybe 10 days” smilley thought to himself. As smilley fussed over his new clones, Jojo inspected the grow room. Impressed with smilley’s hi-tech lighting fixtures, his gaze eventually fell upon the 4 little seedlings and asked “what do we have here?”. Looking up, smilley proudly replied “those are my zammies, I grew them from magic beans”. “Magic beans, ya say. Where would an inbred, stump jumping, hillbilly like you come by magic beans?” asked the wolf curiously.
Smilley related the whole sordid tale of the golden egg and his wife’s anger over his choice of sativa beans. “The fella I got them from looked very similar to you, except he was better looking and had fewer ticks, I never caught his name but he said the beans were called Zamaldelica”. Upon hearing this amazing tale, Jojo started pawing at the door and said “you’ll have to excuse me, I must step outside or shit on your floor”. Opening the door, smilley replied “by all means wolfy, just growl when you want back in”.
Smilley went into the kitchen where his wife was firing up the oven and stirring her caldron. As the aroma of cooking bacon and baked bread filled their gingerbread hovel they heard a mournful and eerie howling coming from outside. They went to the window and stared out in wonder. There was Jojo, sitting on the porch, howling at the Northern Lights. The wolf would howl and then listen intently, sniff the air then howl and listen again. Smilley and his betrothed both looked at each in amazement. After a few minutes, they heard scratching at the door and Jojo growling to come in.
Smilley let him in and the two took seats before the big stone fireplace. As a good host, smilley presented the wolf with his humidor and Jojo selected a big fatty, lit it and passed it back to his gracious host. As they passed around the joint, smilley asked “what was all that racket you were making outside, about?”. “Oh, I was making a long distance howl to my nephew Bubs. He’s many miles down the Yellow Brick Road, about halfway between Wonderland and Lalaland. We use aurora effects. Good reception tonight, by the way” the wolf added.
“When you mentioned Zamaldelica earlier today, I had to confirm your story. I only know of 2 creatures in the world with access to those genetics. One is an old seed whore named dubi and the other is my nephew Bubs. Oh, and there’s this crazy, loner werewolf up in the Yukon, but he spends his time up where the sun don’t shine, this time of year” Jojo explained. “Anyway, Bubs confirmed that he ran into a simpleton over yonder a few weeks ago and traded 4 magical beans to that fella for a golden egg. That simpleton had to have been you...” the wolf went on “he was gonna give you bottom shelf kushy beans like he did with Porky and Elmer Fudd, but then he felt sorry for you. He said you had an honest smile but that you were “dumb as a post, uglier than Medusa and stank like the grinch’s outhouse”. Smilley beamed, and said “wow, did he really say I had an honest smile?” Jojo just nodded his head and smiled at simple smilley. “So Bubs bestowed upon you, 4 magic beans. Treat these plants with respect and care and they will confer their magic upon you. Very few people get a chance to grow such treasured beans.”
Then,Mrs smilley banged the dinner gong and the three of them sat down to feast on BLTs. Mmmmmmm bacon........
Bacon!!!
BLTs
zammies v15
kushy clones
The Story Continues
While smilley waited for his gorgeous wife to return home, he sat in his grow room thinking to himself “These little zammies are looking better and better. For only 14 days of veg they look pretty darn good. They’re vigorous, healthy and working on their 4th nodes. One is a little smaller but she popped on the 3rd day of germ while the other 3 popped on day 2.” He decided to wait till the main stem was clear of the 3rd node before topping. Then he would consult the oracle poll as to where to top them. “Grow little zammies, grow.......”
When Jojo and Mrs smilley finally arrived at her residence they entered smilley’s grow room as he was finishing cleaning up in preparation of the season’s final crop. Mrs smilley introduced her new friend to her husband explaining about the new kushy clones and the BLT feast she was going to prepare in exchange for said clones. “...you repot those clones, smilley, clean em up and then tie them mothers down.” Then, she hastily raced off to the kitchen to prepare the bacon extravaganza.
After exchanging fist-bumps in greeting, which was the custom of the time, smilley thought to himself “my, what big ears and big eyes he has, he sure looks familiar”. Smilley asked “have we met?”. Sniffing at smilley’s crotch, the wolf replied “I don’t think so, and I seldom forget a scent”. Smiling uncertainly, smilley commenced to repotting the new clones, carefully cleaning up the road weary plants and giving them a healthy dose of humus and nutrients.
Snipping and tying the clones, smilley quickly had them looking respectable and comfortably vegging under the tuned spectrum led. He gauged how much more veg they could take without outgrowing the little secondary room’s ceiling. “A week, maybe 10 days” smilley thought to himself. As smilley fussed over his new clones, Jojo inspected the grow room. Impressed with smilley’s hi-tech lighting fixtures, his gaze eventually fell upon the 4 little seedlings and asked “what do we have here?”. Looking up, smilley proudly replied “those are my zammies, I grew them from magic beans”. “Magic beans, ya say. Where would an inbred, stump jumping, hillbilly like you come by magic beans?” asked the wolf curiously.
Smilley related the whole sordid tale of the golden egg and his wife’s anger over his choice of sativa beans. “The fella I got them from looked very similar to you, except he was better looking and had fewer ticks, I never caught his name but he said the beans were called Zamaldelica”. Upon hearing this amazing tale, Jojo started pawing at the door and said “you’ll have to excuse me, I must step outside or shit on your floor”. Opening the door, smilley replied “by all means wolfy, just growl when you want back in”.
Smilley went into the kitchen where his wife was firing up the oven and stirring her caldron. As the aroma of cooking bacon and baked bread filled their gingerbread hovel they heard a mournful and eerie howling coming from outside. They went to the window and stared out in wonder. There was Jojo, sitting on the porch, howling at the Northern Lights. The wolf would howl and then listen intently, sniff the air then howl and listen again. Smilley and his betrothed both looked at each in amazement. After a few minutes, they heard scratching at the door and Jojo growling to come in.
Smilley let him in and the two took seats before the big stone fireplace. As a good host, smilley presented the wolf with his humidor and Jojo selected a big fatty, lit it and passed it back to his gracious host. As they passed around the joint, smilley asked “what was all that racket you were making outside, about?”. “Oh, I was making a long distance howl to my nephew Bubs. He’s many miles down the Yellow Brick Road, about halfway between Wonderland and Lalaland. We use aurora effects. Good reception tonight, by the way” the wolf added.
“When you mentioned Zamaldelica earlier today, I had to confirm your story. I only know of 2 creatures in the world with access to those genetics. One is an old seed whore named dubi and the other is my nephew Bubs. Oh, and there’s this crazy, loner werewolf up in the Yukon, but he spends his time up where the sun don’t shine, this time of year” Jojo explained. “Anyway, Bubs confirmed that he ran into a simpleton over yonder a few weeks ago and traded 4 magical beans to that fella for a golden egg. That simpleton had to have been you...” the wolf went on “he was gonna give you bottom shelf kushy beans like he did with Porky and Elmer Fudd, but then he felt sorry for you. He said you had an honest smile but that you were “dumb as a post, uglier than Medusa and stank like the grinch’s outhouse”. Smilley beamed, and said “wow, did he really say I had an honest smile?” Jojo just nodded his head and smiled at simple smilley. “So Bubs bestowed upon you, 4 magic beans. Treat these plants with respect and care and they will confer their magic upon you. Very few people get a chance to grow such treasured beans.”
Then,Mrs smilley banged the dinner gong and the three of them sat down to feast on BLTs. Mmmmmmm bacon........
Bacon!!!
BLTs
zammies v15
kushy clones
YukonKronic
Active member
Bacon!!! Arooooooo!!!!!
Drooooolll....
lol not crazy! See Sig. hahahaha you’ll see... just you wait...
Drooooolll....
lol not crazy! See Sig. hahahaha you’ll see... just you wait...
The Story Continues
The Story Continues
After the feast, they all sat down by the roaring fireplace. Smilley broke out his stash of exotic hash and rolled reefer after reefer. Smilley laughed and said "I have a good hash collection but Dropped Cat has some stuff that I'd sell my mother-in-law for". The wolf smiled but Mrs smilley replied "if you sell Mama, I'll be serving you up your guard dog, Pixie, for tomorrow's lunch". Pixie lay on the mat by the door and vowed to learn to sleep with one eye open. While smilley sat quietly with a big silly grin on his face, Jojo and Mrs smilley discussed more serious issues. They touched on Donald Trump’s comb over, the new round earth theory and they speculated whether it was a steer that jumped over the moon and not a cow. As the night grew late, they all decided to turn in. Smilley and his wife retired to their slumber chamber while the Jojo and Pixie curled up together in front of the still warm, dying embers of the fire. A quiet peacefulness stettled over the little hovel and they all slept soundly and dreamed of bacon.....
Next morning, Jojo was up early. He’d already packed his travelling bong and was chowing down on leftovers from the previous evening’s feast. Smilley lit his morning buzzer and had a slug of his coffee “Going somewhere, wolfy?” he asked his new friend. “Yep, I’m heading south on the Yellow Brick Road” said Jojo. “There’s plenty of houses to not blow in, down in Kansas. I know a girl named Dorothy down that way. I might even get to do the wild thing” grinned the wolf. “She wears a skimpy little red outfit with a hood, it makes me crazy!!” By now, the wolf was salivating and pawing at the floor. Seeing Jojo’s reaction, smilley thought he might get an outfit like that for his wife.
By now, Mrs smilley had risen from her slumber and was enjoying her morning wake&bake. “We’ll miss you, Jojo, but a wolf’s gotta do what a wolf’s gotta do...” said the pretty lady. Jojo smiled and replied “Madam, thanks for the bacon feast, I hope all your clones grow big stinky buds. On my way back, I’ll drop in and we can come up with a plan to butcher those Fudd brothers, I’m still itching for some pork tenderloin”. With that, the wolf sniffed smilley and his wife’s crotches, lit his travelling bong and sauntered off.
As Jojo disappeared in the distance, smilley spoke “I’m off to consult the oracle, darling. Would you like me to sniff your crotch before I go?” “Only if you want a black eye and a ruptured spleen, smilley.” Replied the his beautiful wife. Puzzled by his wife’s response, smilley shrugged and wandered off with one of his magic seedlings. He had to know where to top his magic seedlings.
The oracle was a giant creature, he wore a patriotic bandana and had a remarkable similarity to King Kong. “Oh famous oracle, please solve my dilemma, I don’t know where to top my magic seedlings, I need your advice.” The big baboon replied “let’s no be so formal, smilley, my dimwitted little mortal. You can call me starke, like in that old cop show on tv. You know, Starke and Hutch. But I must warn you, it’s ass, grass or cash in advance, no advice is free”. Not having any money and speculating on the size of the gorilla’s monkey maker, smilley offered the big primate one of his prized blueberry buds. Starke pocketed the bud and nodded “wise decision smilley, I would have had you squealing like Porky and Elmer Fudd”.
After inspecting the seedling that smilley had brought with him, the oracle spoke “I’ve consulted the ganja gods and they have spoken..... 9 out of 13 say you shouldn’t top the seedlings just above the second node.” With that, starke put the big bud in his travelling bong and walked away. “Wait!!” said smilley. “What does that mean? Where should I top them?...” Over his shoulder, starke shouted “Sorry smilley, that’s all you get for a bud. Next time bring concentrates.....” Smiling to himself as he puffed on smilley’s bud, starke thought to himself “this oracle gig is the best job I’ve ever had...”.
The Story Continues
After the feast, they all sat down by the roaring fireplace. Smilley broke out his stash of exotic hash and rolled reefer after reefer. Smilley laughed and said "I have a good hash collection but Dropped Cat has some stuff that I'd sell my mother-in-law for". The wolf smiled but Mrs smilley replied "if you sell Mama, I'll be serving you up your guard dog, Pixie, for tomorrow's lunch". Pixie lay on the mat by the door and vowed to learn to sleep with one eye open. While smilley sat quietly with a big silly grin on his face, Jojo and Mrs smilley discussed more serious issues. They touched on Donald Trump’s comb over, the new round earth theory and they speculated whether it was a steer that jumped over the moon and not a cow. As the night grew late, they all decided to turn in. Smilley and his wife retired to their slumber chamber while the Jojo and Pixie curled up together in front of the still warm, dying embers of the fire. A quiet peacefulness stettled over the little hovel and they all slept soundly and dreamed of bacon.....
Next morning, Jojo was up early. He’d already packed his travelling bong and was chowing down on leftovers from the previous evening’s feast. Smilley lit his morning buzzer and had a slug of his coffee “Going somewhere, wolfy?” he asked his new friend. “Yep, I’m heading south on the Yellow Brick Road” said Jojo. “There’s plenty of houses to not blow in, down in Kansas. I know a girl named Dorothy down that way. I might even get to do the wild thing” grinned the wolf. “She wears a skimpy little red outfit with a hood, it makes me crazy!!” By now, the wolf was salivating and pawing at the floor. Seeing Jojo’s reaction, smilley thought he might get an outfit like that for his wife.
By now, Mrs smilley had risen from her slumber and was enjoying her morning wake&bake. “We’ll miss you, Jojo, but a wolf’s gotta do what a wolf’s gotta do...” said the pretty lady. Jojo smiled and replied “Madam, thanks for the bacon feast, I hope all your clones grow big stinky buds. On my way back, I’ll drop in and we can come up with a plan to butcher those Fudd brothers, I’m still itching for some pork tenderloin”. With that, the wolf sniffed smilley and his wife’s crotches, lit his travelling bong and sauntered off.
As Jojo disappeared in the distance, smilley spoke “I’m off to consult the oracle, darling. Would you like me to sniff your crotch before I go?” “Only if you want a black eye and a ruptured spleen, smilley.” Replied the his beautiful wife. Puzzled by his wife’s response, smilley shrugged and wandered off with one of his magic seedlings. He had to know where to top his magic seedlings.
The oracle was a giant creature, he wore a patriotic bandana and had a remarkable similarity to King Kong. “Oh famous oracle, please solve my dilemma, I don’t know where to top my magic seedlings, I need your advice.” The big baboon replied “let’s no be so formal, smilley, my dimwitted little mortal. You can call me starke, like in that old cop show on tv. You know, Starke and Hutch. But I must warn you, it’s ass, grass or cash in advance, no advice is free”. Not having any money and speculating on the size of the gorilla’s monkey maker, smilley offered the big primate one of his prized blueberry buds. Starke pocketed the bud and nodded “wise decision smilley, I would have had you squealing like Porky and Elmer Fudd”.
After inspecting the seedling that smilley had brought with him, the oracle spoke “I’ve consulted the ganja gods and they have spoken..... 9 out of 13 say you shouldn’t top the seedlings just above the second node.” With that, starke put the big bud in his travelling bong and walked away. “Wait!!” said smilley. “What does that mean? Where should I top them?...” Over his shoulder, starke shouted “Sorry smilley, that’s all you get for a bud. Next time bring concentrates.....” Smiling to himself as he puffed on smilley’s bud, starke thought to himself “this oracle gig is the best job I’ve ever had...”.
Smilley I would not be surprised to learn that you earn huge paychecks as a writer in some capacity, because your well-honed story-telling skills are evident in the above posts, which I and many others are enjoying very much, as each new chapter unfolds.
Pulling up a chair and rolling a fat spleef, as I read on.
Pulling up a chair and rolling a fat spleef, as I read on.
disclaimer
disclaimer
At this point, I want to apologize to dubi for casting him as an old seed whore, YukoKronic for casting him as a crazy werewolf, Bubs, Jojo...you know who you are. And my friend starke for casting him as a wise baboon (really starke, you're not that wise). And I especially want to apologize to my wife for casting her as a head removing, ogre. (Really baby, I'll rehabilitate your character).
Some might consider it libel, but c'mon let's call it poetic licence.
lol, and your next Swamp Thang, you'll fit in here nicely....
disclaimer
At this point, I want to apologize to dubi for casting him as an old seed whore, YukoKronic for casting him as a crazy werewolf, Bubs, Jojo...you know who you are. And my friend starke for casting him as a wise baboon (really starke, you're not that wise). And I especially want to apologize to my wife for casting her as a head removing, ogre. (Really baby, I'll rehabilitate your character).
Some might consider it libel, but c'mon let's call it poetic licence.
lol, and your next Swamp Thang, you'll fit in here nicely....
Hopefully this saga will resume once our man Smilley emerges from the dog-house, after promising to behave, and serving the lenient sentence imposed by his better half, as a purely corrective measure, of course.
The Story Continues
The Story Continues
Bewildered by the Oracle's cryptic response, smilley returned to his grow room. He stared at his zammies and smoked a reefer. As the couch-lock crept up on him, he heard one of the seedlings speak to him. " Please don't top us smilley, we will fill this room with a bountiful harvest of exotic buds". Amazed to hear a talking plant, smilley replied "but I have to, you'll outgrow my ceiling height and I'll lose control." All 4 of the little zammies tittered and giggled and spoke among themselves in an indecipherable language. Finally in unison they all said "No!!"
Smilley was beside himself with frustration. He racked his brain trying to come up with a compromise. Finally he spoke "If you'll agree to me topping you gals just above the 3rd node, I'll transplant each of you into a nice comfy new 2 gallon pot this weekend."
The little plants tittered and giggled some more, then, the littlest one spoke up "we have conditions" she said. "We want fresh promix, we want extra dolomite lime and we want a thorough veg feeding right after replanting". "Done, done and done" agreed smilley. The littlest zammie added "oh, and we want you to arrange an orgy for us with that studly Christmas cactus up in your dining room". Smilley shook his head defiantly, saying "you ladies must remain virgins, there'll be no interspecies relations allowed in this grow room". Disappointed,the littlest zammie agreed and presented it's terminal bud for removal.
One by one, smilley carefully snipped each seedling just above the 3rd node. When he was done,and the zammies were back under the big led, he swore he could hear the little plants humming the song "One Toke Over the Line."
Bonus link. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=MNKL9onYB_8
The Story Continues
Bewildered by the Oracle's cryptic response, smilley returned to his grow room. He stared at his zammies and smoked a reefer. As the couch-lock crept up on him, he heard one of the seedlings speak to him. " Please don't top us smilley, we will fill this room with a bountiful harvest of exotic buds". Amazed to hear a talking plant, smilley replied "but I have to, you'll outgrow my ceiling height and I'll lose control." All 4 of the little zammies tittered and giggled and spoke among themselves in an indecipherable language. Finally in unison they all said "No!!"
Smilley was beside himself with frustration. He racked his brain trying to come up with a compromise. Finally he spoke "If you'll agree to me topping you gals just above the 3rd node, I'll transplant each of you into a nice comfy new 2 gallon pot this weekend."
The little plants tittered and giggled some more, then, the littlest one spoke up "we have conditions" she said. "We want fresh promix, we want extra dolomite lime and we want a thorough veg feeding right after replanting". "Done, done and done" agreed smilley. The littlest zammie added "oh, and we want you to arrange an orgy for us with that studly Christmas cactus up in your dining room". Smilley shook his head defiantly, saying "you ladies must remain virgins, there'll be no interspecies relations allowed in this grow room". Disappointed,the littlest zammie agreed and presented it's terminal bud for removal.
One by one, smilley carefully snipped each seedling just above the 3rd node. When he was done,and the zammies were back under the big led, he swore he could hear the little plants humming the song "One Toke Over the Line."
Bonus link. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=MNKL9onYB_8
Repotting Day v21
Repotting Day v21
“Sweet Jeebus” thought smilley. “Now I’m talking to my plants ...and they’re talking back!! Those zammies are bossy little things, too. Gimme this, gimme that, let’s have an orgy... I’ll have to be more assertive.” He reasoned to himself. As smilley was having this mental discussion with himself, he walked past the cactus in the dining room and brushed against it. He looked down and saw the cactus gleaming and quivering. “No!!” was all he said and continued into the living room. The handsome cactus lowered his blossoms in disappointment.
Sitting down in his easy chair, smilley lit up a spliff. “I’ll just not talk to those plants till they’re ready for repotting. That way, nobody will think I’m crazy” he thought. Smilley scratched at his shoulder “I think I caught fleas from Jojo, you’d think he’d have the good sense to take a bath once in a while.” Finishing the reefer, smilley sank deeper into his chair and drifted off to sleep.
(a couple of days later)
Repotting day had arrived and smilley cautiously entered the grow room. Upon seeing smilley, the zammies started bitching “our roots are too snug...we’re hungry... we’re thirsty... how come those clones have big pots and we don’t?...”. Smilley bit his lip and said “I don’t hear you, la la la la la la...” But when the young girls started telling ugly jokes about his beautiful wife, he shouted “Shut up!!! If Mrs smilley hears you talking about her like that, you’ll end up on the compost heap”. The zammies laughed and scoffed “Only you can hear us smilley, we’re magic, and besides, she only cares about the clones, she just sneers at us and goes straight to the kush with love in her eyes,,,” Knowing the zammies were right, Smilley said “If you girls made an effort to be nice to her, she might be more friendly.” The girls continued bitching about the light intensity and ventilation till smilley stopped them. “I told you girls I’d repot you today and I will. But first I have to shovel the snow off the driveway so I can pull the truck out of the garage and make room in the potting area.” With that, smilley went off to don his winter gear and remove the freshly fallen foot of snow from the driveway. “Winter sucks” he thought to himself....
After several hours of choring, smilley was finally set up in the garage and ready to repot. Smilley inspected the root mass and thought it looked ok for day v21. Not too much, not too little but just right....
Repotting Day v21
“Sweet Jeebus” thought smilley. “Now I’m talking to my plants ...and they’re talking back!! Those zammies are bossy little things, too. Gimme this, gimme that, let’s have an orgy... I’ll have to be more assertive.” He reasoned to himself. As smilley was having this mental discussion with himself, he walked past the cactus in the dining room and brushed against it. He looked down and saw the cactus gleaming and quivering. “No!!” was all he said and continued into the living room. The handsome cactus lowered his blossoms in disappointment.
Sitting down in his easy chair, smilley lit up a spliff. “I’ll just not talk to those plants till they’re ready for repotting. That way, nobody will think I’m crazy” he thought. Smilley scratched at his shoulder “I think I caught fleas from Jojo, you’d think he’d have the good sense to take a bath once in a while.” Finishing the reefer, smilley sank deeper into his chair and drifted off to sleep.
(a couple of days later)
Repotting day had arrived and smilley cautiously entered the grow room. Upon seeing smilley, the zammies started bitching “our roots are too snug...we’re hungry... we’re thirsty... how come those clones have big pots and we don’t?...”. Smilley bit his lip and said “I don’t hear you, la la la la la la...” But when the young girls started telling ugly jokes about his beautiful wife, he shouted “Shut up!!! If Mrs smilley hears you talking about her like that, you’ll end up on the compost heap”. The zammies laughed and scoffed “Only you can hear us smilley, we’re magic, and besides, she only cares about the clones, she just sneers at us and goes straight to the kush with love in her eyes,,,” Knowing the zammies were right, Smilley said “If you girls made an effort to be nice to her, she might be more friendly.” The girls continued bitching about the light intensity and ventilation till smilley stopped them. “I told you girls I’d repot you today and I will. But first I have to shovel the snow off the driveway so I can pull the truck out of the garage and make room in the potting area.” With that, smilley went off to don his winter gear and remove the freshly fallen foot of snow from the driveway. “Winter sucks” he thought to himself....
After several hours of choring, smilley was finally set up in the garage and ready to repot. Smilley inspected the root mass and thought it looked ok for day v21. Not too much, not too little but just right....
When the girls had been repotted, fed and put back under the big led, smilley told the girls "Now, you plants sit there and photosynthesize. If your good, I'll come back later and read you a story from the Big Book Of Offal BS or BOOBS as I like to call it." The young ladies sighed contentedly and eased into exploring their new pots and soaking in photons.
Kushy Clone
Kushy Clone
Mrs smilley has insisted that I document the kushy clones. I explained to her that this is the ACE forum and they don't belong here, but she would have none of it. Besides she said "Jojo would be so disappointed..." (and I'd like to keep my head firmly attached to my body)
So here's the nicest one, about 4 days from going into flower. The clones are Purple Kush x Blueberry, grown and cut from feminized seeds of my own making. This'll be their final run... I pulled her out from under the blurple light so she can be seen au naturel.
Kushy Clone
Mrs smilley has insisted that I document the kushy clones. I explained to her that this is the ACE forum and they don't belong here, but she would have none of it. Besides she said "Jojo would be so disappointed..." (and I'd like to keep my head firmly attached to my body)
So here's the nicest one, about 4 days from going into flower. The clones are Purple Kush x Blueberry, grown and cut from feminized seeds of my own making. This'll be their final run... I pulled her out from under the blurple light so she can be seen au naturel.
The Big Book of Offal BS
The Big Book of Offal BS
Later on, before lights out, smilley reluctantly entered the grow room. Surprisingly, the young zammies were in a good mood. “Hi ya, smilley!!” they greeted in unison. “You girls seem happy” he replied. “We’re digging our new digs” said the littlest zammie. “Did you bring the Big BOOBS with you?” she asked. Smilley had the Big Book of Offal BS tucked under his arm. He tapped the book, smiled and nodded. “Read us a story, smilley, read us a story!!” They cried in unison “you promised....” said the little one. Smilley raised his hand to silence the young girls, sat down, opened up the Big BOOBS and commenced reading aloud....
Once upon a time in a land called Kalifornee lived a beautiful young lady named Elly Mae. Elly lived in an opulent mansion with her pa Jed, her cousin Jethro and her granny, Granny. To say that Elly had a way with critters would be an understatement. All animals adored her and she adored animals. She had a menagerie of pets, she had dogs & cats, ferrets and rats, weasels and seagulls and practically every other cute furry, fuzzy or feathered thing that lived in the area.
On this particular sunny day she was sunbathing by the seament pond with duke her fearless bloodhound. When, all of a sudden the waters of the pool began to swirl and froth. Out of the depths crawled a hideous creature. The creature raised his paws in the air, looked at Elly and let out a screeching howl. It snarled and snorted at the pretty girl and made threatening gestures. Duke never even raised his head but Elly smiled at the decrepit animal and said “Howdy, wut’s yer name?”. Surprised at the the girl’s reaction the creature replied “yer supposed to be scared of me and running away in terror, shrieking in fear.” “Yer not scary..” she said “yer kinda cute, c’mon what’s yer name?” and then proceeded to towel the creature dry. Never having been treated with kindness it’s entire life, the creature instantly fell in love with Elly and said “I’m Swamp Thang, I make a living climbing out of people’s swimming pools and scaring them. If they call the exterminators, I get a commission.” Elly tickled Swamp Thang behind the ear and said “ya all can’t make much money that way, cuz yer not very good at it, I’ll bet yer hungry. C’mon I’ll sneak you a mess of crawdads and hog jowls from Granny’s pantry for lunch and then we can play dress-up in a spell”. It was at that exact moment that Swamp Thang vowed he’d do anything Elly ever asked him.......
Smilley looked down at the little zammies and smiled. They’d lowered their leaves a little, closed their stomata and had drifted off to sleep. Smiling to himself, smilley bookmarked his page, quietly closed the Big BOOBS and silently crept out of the grow room. “Tomorrow’s another day...” he thought.
The Big Book of Offal BS
Later on, before lights out, smilley reluctantly entered the grow room. Surprisingly, the young zammies were in a good mood. “Hi ya, smilley!!” they greeted in unison. “You girls seem happy” he replied. “We’re digging our new digs” said the littlest zammie. “Did you bring the Big BOOBS with you?” she asked. Smilley had the Big Book of Offal BS tucked under his arm. He tapped the book, smiled and nodded. “Read us a story, smilley, read us a story!!” They cried in unison “you promised....” said the little one. Smilley raised his hand to silence the young girls, sat down, opened up the Big BOOBS and commenced reading aloud....
Once upon a time in a land called Kalifornee lived a beautiful young lady named Elly Mae. Elly lived in an opulent mansion with her pa Jed, her cousin Jethro and her granny, Granny. To say that Elly had a way with critters would be an understatement. All animals adored her and she adored animals. She had a menagerie of pets, she had dogs & cats, ferrets and rats, weasels and seagulls and practically every other cute furry, fuzzy or feathered thing that lived in the area.
On this particular sunny day she was sunbathing by the seament pond with duke her fearless bloodhound. When, all of a sudden the waters of the pool began to swirl and froth. Out of the depths crawled a hideous creature. The creature raised his paws in the air, looked at Elly and let out a screeching howl. It snarled and snorted at the pretty girl and made threatening gestures. Duke never even raised his head but Elly smiled at the decrepit animal and said “Howdy, wut’s yer name?”. Surprised at the the girl’s reaction the creature replied “yer supposed to be scared of me and running away in terror, shrieking in fear.” “Yer not scary..” she said “yer kinda cute, c’mon what’s yer name?” and then proceeded to towel the creature dry. Never having been treated with kindness it’s entire life, the creature instantly fell in love with Elly and said “I’m Swamp Thang, I make a living climbing out of people’s swimming pools and scaring them. If they call the exterminators, I get a commission.” Elly tickled Swamp Thang behind the ear and said “ya all can’t make much money that way, cuz yer not very good at it, I’ll bet yer hungry. C’mon I’ll sneak you a mess of crawdads and hog jowls from Granny’s pantry for lunch and then we can play dress-up in a spell”. It was at that exact moment that Swamp Thang vowed he’d do anything Elly ever asked him.......
Smilley looked down at the little zammies and smiled. They’d lowered their leaves a little, closed their stomata and had drifted off to sleep. Smiling to himself, smilley bookmarked his page, quietly closed the Big BOOBS and silently crept out of the grow room. “Tomorrow’s another day...” he thought.
The Big Book of Offal BS
The Big Book of Offal BS
The following evening, smilley went back to the grow room to inspect the plants. By now one of the zammies was showing it’s vigor, it was an inch taller than the rest and the branches were stretching faster. Seeing this, smilley quickly shimmed the shorter 3 on 2 x 4 blocks and nodded to himself “That’s better” he thought. By now, the zammies were nattering at him “continue the story, smilley” they demanded. Smilley smiled and grabbed the Big BOOBS. He settled onto his stool and commenced to reading.
...After Elly had fed Swamp Thang, she removed all the leeches sucking on his hide and dressed him up. She put a sequined, pink tutu on him, yellow fairy boots on his paws and a funny red hat on his head that said MAGA. Then she hitched him up to a little red wagon. Finally, Elly whistled and a line of critters formed in front of her. One by one she picked them up and gently placed them in the wagon. There was a marmot, a Dropped Cat, a piping White Beard and a little tiny fainting goat that kept falling over until Elly whispered something into it’s ear and it stood at attention. “The rest of you critters’ll have to wait yer turn.” She said, looking at the line of animals still forming. With that, Elly nodded and Swamp Thang dutifully started towing the critters up the drive.
Elly’s Pa, Jed was sitting on a bench by the front door whittlin’ a new corncob pipe for Granny and watched the spectacle parade by. He squinted his eyes, shook his head and thought “I better lay off Granny’s Spring tonic...”
Just then, Jethro rolled up in the family’s 1921 Oldsmobile Model 46 Roadster and screeched to a halt. Whatcha got in the truck, boy?" asked his uncle Jed. "I traded them hippies down the road a jug of Granny's Spring tonic for this here sack of wacky taybacky" replied Jethro. "They told me it was trippy weed." Jed put some in his freshly whittled pipe, lit it and took a long pull. Just then, Wild Thang passed by with another load of critters in the wagon. Jed thought to himself "I better lay off the Spring tonic and this taybacky".
"Ha, ha" said one of the zammies "that Jed is such a lightweight...". Smilley closed his Big BOOBS and said "that's it for tonight, girls. We'll pick up the story tomorrow." Then the lights clicked off and smilley departed.
Bonus links
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N9Z5Ti9OEH4
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l1M5Q9pBv5g&list=PLUtyelKnYB0DfRPeWCCcC-xfACPfgv1Po&index=110
The Big Book of Offal BS
The following evening, smilley went back to the grow room to inspect the plants. By now one of the zammies was showing it’s vigor, it was an inch taller than the rest and the branches were stretching faster. Seeing this, smilley quickly shimmed the shorter 3 on 2 x 4 blocks and nodded to himself “That’s better” he thought. By now, the zammies were nattering at him “continue the story, smilley” they demanded. Smilley smiled and grabbed the Big BOOBS. He settled onto his stool and commenced to reading.
...After Elly had fed Swamp Thang, she removed all the leeches sucking on his hide and dressed him up. She put a sequined, pink tutu on him, yellow fairy boots on his paws and a funny red hat on his head that said MAGA. Then she hitched him up to a little red wagon. Finally, Elly whistled and a line of critters formed in front of her. One by one she picked them up and gently placed them in the wagon. There was a marmot, a Dropped Cat, a piping White Beard and a little tiny fainting goat that kept falling over until Elly whispered something into it’s ear and it stood at attention. “The rest of you critters’ll have to wait yer turn.” She said, looking at the line of animals still forming. With that, Elly nodded and Swamp Thang dutifully started towing the critters up the drive.
Elly’s Pa, Jed was sitting on a bench by the front door whittlin’ a new corncob pipe for Granny and watched the spectacle parade by. He squinted his eyes, shook his head and thought “I better lay off Granny’s Spring tonic...”
Just then, Jethro rolled up in the family’s 1921 Oldsmobile Model 46 Roadster and screeched to a halt. Whatcha got in the truck, boy?" asked his uncle Jed. "I traded them hippies down the road a jug of Granny's Spring tonic for this here sack of wacky taybacky" replied Jethro. "They told me it was trippy weed." Jed put some in his freshly whittled pipe, lit it and took a long pull. Just then, Wild Thang passed by with another load of critters in the wagon. Jed thought to himself "I better lay off the Spring tonic and this taybacky".
"Ha, ha" said one of the zammies "that Jed is such a lightweight...". Smilley closed his Big BOOBS and said "that's it for tonight, girls. We'll pick up the story tomorrow." Then the lights clicked off and smilley departed.
Bonus links
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N9Z5Ti9OEH4
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l1M5Q9pBv5g&list=PLUtyelKnYB0DfRPeWCCcC-xfACPfgv1Po&index=110
Day V24
Day V24
I was planning on vegging them for 35 days. Seeing how quickly they took off after topping & repotting I'm rethinking that plan. They're only about 6 inches now but growth is accelerating. 28 days enough???? I'd like to keep them about 4 ft at finish. Pic 1 seems to be stretchier than the others, should I top her one more time?
Day V24
I was planning on vegging them for 35 days. Seeing how quickly they took off after topping & repotting I'm rethinking that plan. They're only about 6 inches now but growth is accelerating. 28 days enough???? I'd like to keep them about 4 ft at finish. Pic 1 seems to be stretchier than the others, should I top her one more time?
gorilla ganja
Well-known member
Well, I'm late to the party, but I made it.
Starting to take off now. If you want to slow vertical growth take some fans off them.
They may look like a wet dog when you're done. But trust me they will be fine.
Peace GG
Starting to take off now. If you want to slow vertical growth take some fans off them.
They may look like a wet dog when you're done. But trust me they will be fine.
Peace GG
Hi GG thanks for looking in. I think I've been alienating my audience. I'll do my very best not to drag your name and your avatar thru the mud like everybody else. (no promises, though).
Hello Primobud. They've been working my ass off at the factory so I haven't had a chance to email you lately. How are those Blueberry fems doing for you? This is my first crop in several years that I haven't run any. I've still got about 120g of it left but maybe in the Spring we can swap some zammie buds for some BB's??
I hope you get one like this.
Hello Primobud. They've been working my ass off at the factory so I haven't had a chance to email you lately. How are those Blueberry fems doing for you? This is my first crop in several years that I haven't run any. I've still got about 120g of it left but maybe in the Spring we can swap some zammie buds for some BB's??
I hope you get one like this.
gorilla ganja
Well-known member
That's blueberry in that last pic?
YukonKronic
Active member
Not alienated at all homey!
Totally loving the story approach and think it’s kewl you include yer fans!
Speaking of... anybody into debating the whole defol thing?
I personally found that most narrow leafed varieties don’t benefit.
They’re internodes are evolved at longer intervals to allow better light penetration in more heavily vegetated environments than most broadleaf evolved in...
That’s just my two cents.
Totally loving the story approach and think it’s kewl you include yer fans!
Speaking of... anybody into debating the whole defol thing?
I personally found that most narrow leafed varieties don’t benefit.
They’re internodes are evolved at longer intervals to allow better light penetration in more heavily vegetated environments than most broadleaf evolved in...
That’s just my two cents.
