You know youre stoned when.....

[mr.brunch]

When you start to think..." Wow , that conspiracy theory sounds plausible..."

 

[HOPS5K]

When you're sitting there wondering where your lighter is for a few minutes only to find out it was in your hand the whole time.

 

[exploziv]

you roll a joint (and being high that takes a lot), then, while you try to light it find out you had half of joint remaining in the ashtray, or even worst, in your mouth..

 

[ariston]

when you light up the bowl on your bong and wonder why you cant get anything, only to realize the bowl is full of ashes

 

[exploziv]

that reminds me of those moments that I empty the vape bowl and forget to refill it before puting it on the vape again. If I am really high, I can puff a while on an "empty" load before I realise it's just hot air.

 

[Jhhnn]

when you're standing in the middle of the room, trying to remember why you got up in the first place.

Good to know. I thought those were senior moments...

 

[atk7]

Your on your third attempt to reply to this thread but keep forgetting what you were going to say.......now what did I do with that lighter.........

 

[barnyard]

at a Gil Scott-Heron concert with your brothers and sister...you know your stoned when you've got cotton mouth so bad that all you want is a drink...but asking for "pop" sounds like "pot" so you get handed the pipe again!

 

[floralheart]

everything is really loud, but you can't really hear it, or it isn't really registering in the mind...

I could be in a rainstorm, and I'd still be eating this plate of food. that's high..

and, i'm about to pile some golden grahams on all this sheeeit, and deal with it tomorrow.

 

[floralheart]

Good to know. I thought those were senior moments...

I started having those right after I became a senior in high school

 

[theclearspot]

Probably the best one I remember was years back and I knew this older guy 'Mad Mike The Poet' and I met him for a couple of beers in town.So he turns up with red eye bad style we down a couple of pints and he says hes got his car outside. So we go out and he says 'wow man my cars been stolen'. Then he saw his car down the hill sittin across the middle of the road. Hed forgot to put the hand brake on. class.

 

[floralheart]

You dial the tv remote to order Chinese, twice because the first call didn't go through.

Nice

 

[whatsmells]

geeaasjet sebbd trrrs tree sa ccoss

 

[Sabudda]

I once spent an hour searching a party for a friend while the friend I was looking for helped me look....

 

[floralheart]

black hat mozzarella chat, kick em in the tuna, kick em kick em in the tuna...

when you think those are good rap lyrics you're pretty much done

 

[ozza]

-when you talk to everyone with your bong in your hand like a microphone

-when someone asks do you smoke and you say smoke what?

-when someone asks you where you would travel to and you say Amsterdam or Colorado?

-when 4:15 p.m. becomes knock off time.

-when you start to imagine that everything around you could actually be crafted into a bong, even your fish tank.

-when you know Bob Marley and Cypress hill songs off by heart.

-when your insurance asks your most valuable object and you have to stop yourself from writing bong.

-when people talk about the stink of a skunk and you say you love that smell.

-when you forget why you came to this thread????

 

[mr.brunch]

When you call someone and forget who you are calling before they pick up....

 

[theclearspot]

Don't put beers in the freezer to chill when you're stoned. You always forget and have to clean the broken mess before your wife notices .....

 

[MarijuanaMogul]

Remember just booking into a hotel, went outside for a bit smoked up came back and was on my floor and FORGOT room number. Realized how retarded I would look if I went into lobby asking which was my room again.

 

[nukklehead]

Working on the house and "where the fuck did I leave "that tool"..........over and over again.. fuuuuuuuuuk!
Sure makes it fun though