When to tell your kids about pot?

[Midnite Rambler]

There just ain't no hard and fast rules about what's the best way to deal with lifes trials and tribulations, especially when you're trying to influence an adolescents behaviour. What worked for me was smoking dope every day, never having a career, no respect for law and order, being an anarchistic atheist, "Fuck the system! Fuck 'em all!" As a result my boy is in the third year of a veterinary degree, he's never smoked, never been arrested, was ranked sixth best in the UK in his best swimming event, and fuck me his girlfriend has talked him into going to church. I don't know, you try and bring 'em right but...........

 

[mpd]

Skilled incompetence mean anything to you?
How would you know? You know everything else?

Stop whining. You know I'm right on this and anything to the contrary is sophistry and you know that too. So I don't know it all and evidently you know some things, so you should be happy and grateful I took the time to set a standard.

 

[bbing]

lol,
oh goodness.......




I like what you said about maturity...
I like what you said about not introducing (ito here try this, not education)
I like what you said about every thing else..... save that.

You didn't set a standard, you came off with an "end of chapter" tone.


I'll whine anytime I fucking want; as it appears you will dictate anytime you fucking want.

Your points are valid w/o qualifying it with how many foster kids and step children you have raised. Octo-Mom got a few more than you but you dont see anybody rushing to her for parenting advice.

Ironic signature line there MPD, you running up quite a tab

 

[Kinderfeld]

There is no need to argue guys. There is no black and white answer, no body is wrong and no body is right. I myself am not a father (that I know of ) and I am very young. My parents were the opposite as midnite and look where I am? Junior in college but I still grow the herb, I smoke it while I write papers, I smoke it before doing a project and I have good grades, helps me relax and focus without being stressed out. I can hold a steady job, easy. I never smoked more than twice a year until I hit 19. However I am considered a heavy user and I was interested in growing/smoking the best herb with no help from anyone, it was a personal interest. I am proof there is no right and wrong, black and white.

There are no rules and no guidlines. Sometimes you have to just go with your gut. They are just too physically/mentally young/immature to make that kind of mature choice. With that said I think it is a good idea to not supply any child under 18 with MJ. MJ may not hurt them while they are young...but most the time it doesn't help. Similar to alcohol, some can use it responsibly, some can't. But it is better to find out when they are considered an 'adult' and can face the consequences of their actions. When they are young they are 'untouchable' to an extent by the law and so they do not wrap their heads around the full idea/consequences of what they are doing and will be mislead. There is no need to supply it to them to find out, especially if it means risking your own neck.

I guess my point is do not be so judgmental on others ways of doing things this is a case by case scenario. As far as describing the medicinal effects, that has a time and a place but it is probably very hard to explain to a 14 year old child a lot of these explanations, their minds are young and interpret things very differently. I think when they are a legal adult and have seen little more how the world works and know a bit more of who they are it works out a lot better, they will either take an interest or wont, with a more valid frame of judgment.

 

[OldMan&theWeed]

I lied to my ten-year-old son. This is why.

He asked me during a walk, “Dad, did you ever smoke Marijuana?”

I straight out lied and gave him a firm "no" that put an end to the topic. This hurt. I always try to give him straight answers. I feel like a hypocrite because I am a hypocrite. But I lied to him with noble intentions.

A few years ago, when Bush was asked about his own drug use he said:

"If I were you, I wouldn't tell your kids that you smoked pot unless you want 'em to smoke pot. I think it's important for leaders, and parents, not to send mixed signals. I don't want some kid saying, 'Well, Governor Bush tried it.'"

Yea, he’s fucking hypocrite, and was a poor president, but that doesn’t make him wrong about everything. I understand how the dick-head feels.

By telling my son about my hobby, I’m making him an accomplice to it. By either unveiling it as new unexpected information, or confirming his suspicions, I’m asking my child to conspire with me. I’m asking him to keep a secret--a skill most children and adolescents are not very good at. If I admit to it, I’m putting him, and our family at risk.

Also, if he sees it as something normal, like cigarette smoking, he’s probably a lot more likely to start early. Even though I’m skeptical that pot smoking is profoundly harmful to the mental development of children (I suspect it may be safer than some legal medications prescribed to children) I still would prefer not to gamble.

Lastly, I fear that if MJ becomes a central focus of his life, he’s libel to obsess on it, instead of obsessing on his schoolwork. I did during 9th and 10th grade. They were wasted years for me. I want him to be the same studious person that he is now, and I fear he won’t be that if he hangs around with a bunch of anti-intellectual adolescent pothead friends in high school.

That’s why I lied.

 

[bbing]

I think for you that was the right call and if you put that much consideration into the rest of your parenting decisions, I am sure he will be well equipped to make those decisions when the time comes. I am sure he will understand as an adult why you had to make that call. I did.

My son was a bit older (17 at the time) when we discussed it, and I tried to control the situation with my "when the time is right let me know I and I will make sure you can try some safely grown non-black market weed with your Pops" talk. He's in his 20's now and obviously the situation was much different and involved friends in college. But I feel i communicated the responsibility required with it and he has never had a problem with drugs or alcohol. BTW weed just isn't his thing and after trying it a couple times he passes on it now. I guess it wasn't any kinda of Hallmark moment but I am happy with the fact he was open with me about it before checking it out. I guess i have laid some pretty good groundwork with all my children to be open to discuss most things w/o reservation. It pays off in the end.

 

[kallenavndk]

LOOOOOL Midnite hahaha thats my point kids are damn clewer and sometime they do not know they are hehe my cuz was raised by a stoner mom when my cuz was in kinder garden she took the paper we use to wrap our lunch in and form it like a ball then they ask her what she was doing she said..."im mixing"
i will stop growing outside when my kid is about 3 years , when he reach 5 i can no longer keep him outside a hitten indside room hehe not if he is like me i find things that aint surpose to be find when i was kid and hey hehe midnite rambler have found out that hes son does it to and thats how kids are .. beware they are some freaks them kids

 

[kansasgrown]

Eight years old seems a bit too young of an age to be hitting them with adult topics. I just spoke to my 14 year old son about marijuana usage but do not want it to hamper his will to succeed in life. He has been wanting to be a doctor and I am all for him getting a degree that he can make a good living at.

 

[mpd]

lol,
oh goodness.......




I like what you said about maturity...
I like what you said about not introducing (ito here try this, not education)
I like what you said about every thing else..... save that.

You didn't set a standard, you came off with an "end of chapter" tone.


I'll whine anytime I fucking want; as it appears you will dictate anytime you fucking want.

Your points are valid w/o qualifying it with how many foster kids and step children you have raised. Octo-Mom got a few more than you but you dont see anybody rushing to her for parenting advice.

Ironic signature line there MPD, you running up quite a tab

It was supposed to be fucking funny, Mr. Micro-Derm.

 

[mpd]

Don't worry about paying my tab, I'll get a bail-out.

Man, I apologize for the snarky sarcasm that definitely didn't hit the mark. This is a very serious topic and deserves better from us - as a community - than I have shown here.

Sometimes I am really fucked up. I'll try to tighten it up and get it together.

Peace out and all that happy hippy horsehockey...

 

[bbing]

Mr. Micro-Derm.

Muhahahaa!

ill lighten up too.

 

[mpd]

Okay, so at least some part of it was funny and the rest sucked big weenies...

 

[808kahumai]

If one truly believes that there is nothing wrong with growing and making useful items with plants, then why would one lie and hide the plants from their children? The herb sits among all the other plants in the garden. My children do not see anything wrong with the plant and enjoy watching it grow. They appreciate and are taught the usefulness of each plant. It is not separtated from the bamboo or the tomatoes. They do not separate people either. They appreciate differences, but do not place them in any separate catagory. People are just people, and plants are just plants.

 

[jefff]

I lied to my ten-year-old son. This is why.

You have a very good mind. I applaud your thinking.........

 

[mpd]

I lied to my ten-year-old son. This is why.

He asked me during a walk, “Dad, did you ever smoke Marijuana?”

I straight out lied and gave him a firm "no" that put an end to the topic. This hurt. I always try to give him straight answers. I feel like a hypocrite because I am a hypocrite. But I lied to him with noble intentions.

A few years ago, when Bush was asked about his own drug use he said:

"If I were you, I wouldn't tell your kids that you smoked pot unless you want 'em to smoke pot. I think it's important for leaders, and parents, not to send mixed signals. I don't want some kid saying, 'Well, Governor Bush tried it.'"

Yea, he’s fucking hypocrite, and was a poor president, but that doesn’t make him wrong about everything. I understand how the dick-head feels.

By telling my son about my hobby, I’m making him an accomplice to it. By either unveiling it as new unexpected information, or confirming his suspicions, I’m asking my child to conspire with me. I’m asking him to keep a secret--a skill most children and adolescents are not very good at. If I admit to it, I’m putting him, and our family at risk.

Also, if he sees it as something normal, like cigarette smoking, he’s probably a lot more likely to start early. Even though I’m skeptical that pot smoking is profoundly harmful to the mental development of children (I suspect it may be safer than some legal medications prescribed to children) I still would prefer not to gamble.

Lastly, I fear that if MJ becomes a central focus of his life, he’s libel to obsess on it, instead of obsessing on his schoolwork. I did during 9th and 10th grade. They were wasted years for me. I want him to be the same studious person that he is now, and I fear he won’t be that if he hangs around with a bunch of anti-intellectual adolescent pothead friends in high school.

That’s why I lied.

Never let a little hypocrisy get in the way of a teachable moment...

You're a parent, you don't have the luxury of feeling guilty or doing whatever you like. You have to do the right thing for those who can't do it for themselves. Don't you dare ever, ever, ever feel bad about doing something to protect your kid's future. When the day comes when the child finally realizes why you lied and when you lied, they will thank you for helping them through a tough patch in the road called "growing up safe".

 

[khaleel]

Stop whining. You know I'm right on this and anything to the contrary is sophistry and you know that too. So I don't know it all and evidently you know some things, so you should be happy and grateful I took the time to set a standard.

omg is that a rush limbaugh quote in your sig? hahaha pot truly does bring all folks together...

mpd you made a few good points, but alas just as mr. limbaugh you are stuck in the belief that Truth looks the same from all angles. that is, it must look the same to everyone else as it does from YOUR angle and you'll be damned if anyone will tell you otherwise.

you provided a good description of how you see it from your perspective, now let others tell you what truth looks like from where they stand. i promise, everything will be ok.

and for the newbies on this thread, what just happened is called "flaming" - starting SHIT with people - don't do it. there are very good administrators who keep that crap off of here.

GREAT THREAD!!! I am an honorably discharged disabled US Army veteran who uses medical marijuana, and i have a six month old son so i'll have to revisit this thread in 18 years or so. keep up the wonderful dialogue. play nice.

 

[Maj.PotHead]

both my kids knew i smoked cannibiss from day 1 when both my son's turned 14 i talked with them about drugs and cannibiss. i gave both the opertunity to smoke it at home in thier bedrooms if they choose this path, my eldest passed and has never tried it. my youngest took me up on the offer i never hid it from either son i raised them to be truthfull and why should i be any different. my reasoning for giving my sons the chance to smoke at home was so i could have more control over what gose on in thier life when it comes to drugs or cannibiss. also they wernt allowed to have friends over to party i wasnt the party house of the hood and is friends no no no.

 

[jefff]

Pretty much the same story here ,ended up kinda of funny years later. Both my kids, with kids of their own still laugh about how much pot they used to lift from my stash................... Turned out to be good people (pot stealers as it was) anyway !

 

[boroboro]

If one truly believes that there is nothing wrong with growing and making useful items with plants, then why would one lie and hide the plants from their children? The herb sits among all the other plants in the garden. My children do not see anything wrong with the plant and enjoy watching it grow. They appreciate and are taught the usefulness of each plant. It is not separtated from the bamboo or the tomatoes. They do not separate people either. They appreciate differences, but do not place them in any separate catagory. People are just people, and plants are just plants.

You're mostly right, of course, although I would say that cannabis is a lot more than just a plant.

What makes this a hard topic is that I would like to be honest and helpful with my children and also stay out of trouble. There are probably different strategies here for growers and those who just use cannabis (in most jurisdictions).

 

[mpd]

omg is that a rush limbaugh quote in your sig? hahaha pot truly does bring all folks together...

mpd you made a few good points, but alas just as mr. limbaugh you are stuck in the belief that Truth looks the same from all angles. that is, it must look the same to everyone else as it does from YOUR angle and you'll be damned if anyone will tell you otherwise.

you provided a good description of how you see it from your perspective, now let others tell you what truth looks like from where they stand. i promise, everything will be ok.

and for the newbies on this thread, what just happened is called "flaming" - starting SHIT with people - don't do it. there are very good administrators who keep that crap off of here.

GREAT THREAD!!! I am an honorably discharged disabled US Army veteran who uses medical marijuana, and i have a six month old son so i'll have to revisit this thread in 18 years or so. keep up the wonderful dialogue. play nice.

Silly goose. I was having some fun and it wasn't taken as fun. While I am serious about doing the right thing when it comes to minors, all of the stuff I said about whining and thanking me and taking my time to set a standard was all said in pure jest. I don't think of myself any better than anyone else. My goodness, I have a debilitating mental illness that threatens my very existence and will probably cause me to end my own life and thus cast a judgment upon myself that nobody would think of as noble, elegant or elevated above that perch that even the lowest Mongolian yak pen cleaner can attain by simply living a decent and humane existence. I walked away from organized religion and the Christian faith. I don't know of many people who would look at someone with those qualifications and say they are indeed someone to emulate.

No, I was just having some fun and went too far because I'm not quite all the way out of the halfway house for The Home For the Chronically Strange & Tragically Inappropriate.

It takes all kinds.