My Son Blackmailed Me... then Snitched!!!

[Gans]

It's live and learn people he has no idea of all the problems he could have caused

Not to sound like a jerk, but this isn't a 7 year old kid we are talking about here, his son was a year away from graduating from high school. He knew exactly what the consequences of his actions could be, and went ahead and snitched anyway.

We all have fucked up in some way shape or form

This is true, but I doubt any of us intentionally and maliciously tried to have our father (who was nice enough to take him in when he needed a place to stay) thrown in jail and have his life ruined just because he said he might not let the spoiled kids grandparents but him a brand new car if he didn't straighten up. That is honestly one of the lowest things I can even think of a kid doing to his parent, and there is no excuse, imo. (especially since the kid was basically already an adult and almost out of high school and knew damn well what the consequences of his actions could be)

Might sound harsh, but its real talk.

 

[Hammerhead]

Not all states have legalized medicinal cannabis, or I'm sure we all would.

That's to bad. I thought most states did. Need to get your voters out. Unless you live in a very conservative state no hope then

 

[Weedninja]

doob, we got a little side-tracked but to answer your question- If you are 99.9% certain that you can hide your grow from your kid, then I say grow away.

 

[pugnacious]

Anyone see that movie Usual Suspects?



"Rat on your pop. Then Kaiser Sose will getcha."


I was just joking with my comment about me looking at my 2 yo suspiciously. But I did mean it when I said this is a sad story and that I dont really want my kid to grow up. Its ugly world out there. But im confident I can raise him with a strong ethic and moral conviction. Not saying that the OP didnt. This is one of those situations where things just turn out for the worst. Id buy the OP a beer and just listen to how he feels. I mean his kid just ratted on him man..

 

[BiG H3rB Tr3E]

if he is of age, beat his ass>>
buy him a beer and give him a joint
and impart some wisdom on the misguided one..
nothing like the ol punishment//reward
to set them back on track....

 

[RudolfTheRed]

if that were my son that little punk ass would of had the fear of god put into him as soon as he threatened me.

 

[doob-e-pufr]

Herbman, your not hijacking bro. I started this thread for insight.

79 thanks for input. I will continue. Moving away or never growing again means he beat me. I can't allow that.

Classy, beating his ass at the time would have poured gas on the fire. He knows he got a pass. His one and only pass.

whiterabbit9, He is learning that I will always look at him as a traitor. That he has damaged our relationship forever. The rest of his family too.

And tell the stepdad that the kid's been talking shit about him. And give him a fifth of Jack and a pair of brass knuckles.

LOL

Gans, thanks for reply. I agree with most of what you said. As far as too kind, it is my child. That makes it different to me. Little harder to administer"street justice" to a son who at one point meant more to me than anything.
The thing out of all this that hurts the most, is he has taken that feeling away from me.

Kusheater1, I hope your right and agree with you mostly. Saving the pictures indicate pre-meditation to me. He had time reconsider. He chose not too.
I'm not over that, yet.

Weedninja, I certain about my safety as anyone can ever be. Thanks for reply!

BiG, words of wisdom friend.

Rudolf, I thought I did put the fear in him. Another lesson I learned was that kids today for the most part don't have that fear. Like 79 said, the age we live in.

 

[DiscoBiscuit]

doob-e-pufr, I wish some of the peeps would take it easy seeing this is a year past and you've forgiven your son. It's unfortunate he picked such a serious situation to play you. Lots of kids play their parents without having the judgment to know what they're getting into. I don't have as much empathy for your son's friend though.

That said I'm glad your son's doing well at school. I hope the two of you have a long positive relationship and I hope you're able to return to growing one of these days. I'd like to see some AK47 pics myself lol.

 

[grasspass]

Forgive him , but don't trust him. Trust is earned , forgiveness is given and for your good and his. My untrustworthy 17 year old turned into a trustworthy 21 year old.

 

[KUSHEATER1]

Forgive him , but don't trust him. Trust is earned , forgiveness is given and for your good and his. My untrustworthy 17 year old turned into a trustworthy 21 year old.

WE ALL HAVE TO GROW UP AND MATURE...

 

[Classyathome]

Forgive? No...

Forget? No...

Blackmail and snitch, folks - premeditated, pure and simple.

He called leo on his dad, and and knew what he was doing.

 

[PazVerdeRadical]

The thing that's hard to face is who's fault is it that he's a ill-mannered, disrespectful, conniving little shit? All the time's he needed an ass whoopin like I would have got. And I reasoned that I only get him every other weekend. I did'nt whack him on the back of the head for not saying please and thank you. Bought him anything he wanted without really earning it? Some that is mine.

hello doob, it is good to see you acknowledge that being a father is not just about busting a nut inside a woman and then buying shit to the resulting offspring...

every man and woman who has had a child should have the consciousness that the decision to bring new life here was not made by the new born child, afterall, there are ways to have sex without producing offspring, so every mother and father out there who is having trouble with their kids should first understand that what they brought into the world is a being who did not have much to say about this world of ours, which is full of shit; also you need to realize that your kids will be influenced by a lot more than just the parents, and since we live in a fucked up world, well, most influences will be fucked up...

beating your kids is a dumb idea also... I will tell you a story why: a neighbor of mine killed both his mom and dad while they were asleep because they would beat the kid as a way to "educate" him, truth is, they were just turning a child into a monster through violence. he was 10 when he did it... some say he does not regret it after +20 years... think of it this way: you are born into a world you did not ask to be born in, the people who are supposed to be your family are monsters, the world around you is hopeless, and the influences aborbed outside of the house all come from the mass-media, you do the math.

you said it yourself in your first post too, you were never honest in regards your cannabis consumption and never laid down the Foundation, Each One Teach One.

But what is done is done, and what happens after this no one can really say... I would give growing a chance again, and I would not see my son as an enemy, specially when a lot of the character flaws he has are there due to lack of proper fathering. I would not let him know I grow though nor have him over the house, just so he knows that he also did very wrong... maybe smoke out with him if he is of age too, and tell him how honestly how you feel about him and his little buddy snitching and all; if done with love and care, that will have a greater impact than beating him up imo.

much good luck and tons of peace, and be safe.

Paz.

 

[L~B]

If it was my son I would disown him he knows the cardnal rules and he is 8.... he is going to try me but he will never take family stuff else where what happens at our house stays at our house.

 

[j.guit.err]

I agree with Paz, very good advice.

 

[doob-e-pufr]

doob-e-pufr, I wish some of the peeps would take it easy seeing this is a year past and you've forgiven your son. It's unfortunate he picked such a serious situation to play you. Lots of kids play their parents without having the judgment to know what they're getting into. I don't have as much empathy for your son's friend though.

That said I'm glad your son's doing well at school. I hope the two of you have a long positive relationship and I hope you're able to return to growing one of these days. I'd like to see some AK47 pics myself lol.

Thanks DisBis, this bud's for you!

Forgive him , but don't trust him. Trust is earned , forgiveness is given and for your good and his. My untrustworthy 17 year old turned into a trustworthy 21 year old.

Thanks for reply grasspass! I hope that's how it turns out for us.

WE ALL HAVE TO GROW UP AND MATURE...

Kush, that's what I have to believe too

Forgive? No...

Forget? No...

Blackmail and snitch, folks - premeditated, pure and simple.

He called leo on his dad, and and knew what he was doing.

Classy, I respect what your saying, I will never trust him in that way again. The thing I'm realizing I would have done different maybe is being open about it since he was a child. I have seen that work out both ways. Most cases though, the kid has taken the wrong road. I'm only speaking about my personal experience.

hello doob, it is good to see you acknowledge that being a father is not just about busting a nut inside a woman and then buying shit to the resulting offspring...

every man and woman who has had a child should have the consciousness that the decision to bring new life here was not made by the new born child, afterall, there are ways to have sex without producing offspring, so every mother and father out there who is having trouble with their kids should first understand that what they brought into the world is a being who did not have much to say about this world of ours, which is full of shit; also you need to realize that your kids will be influenced by a lot more than just the parents, and since we live in a fucked up world, well, most influences will be fucked up...

beating your kids is a dumb idea also... I will tell you a story why: a neighbor of mine killed both his mom and dad while they were asleep because they would beat the kid as a way to "educate" him, truth is, they were just turning a child into a monster through violence. he was 10 when he did it... some say he does not regret it after +20 years... think of it this way: you are born into a world you did not ask to be born in, the people who are supposed to be your family are monsters, the world around you is hopeless, and the influences aborbed outside of the house all come from the mass-media, you do the math.

you said it yourself in your first post too, you were never honest in regards your cannabis consumption and never laid down the Foundation, Each One Teach One.

But what is done is done, and what happens after this no one can really say... I would give growing a chance again, and I would not see my son as an enemy, specially when a lot of the character flaws he has are there due to lack of proper fathering. I would not let him know I grow though nor have him over the house, just so he knows that he also did very wrong... maybe smoke out with him if he is of age too, and tell him how honestly how you feel about him and his little buddy snitching and all; if done with love and care, that will have a greater impact than beating him up imo.

much good luck and tons of peace, and be safe.

Paz.

Paz, well said. Some comments I would like make to the folks about "beating his ass".
1. If he would have shown up beat up, don't you think I would have been prime suspect?
2. I go by what happened, not what could have happened. I had to shut down, I was going to anyway, at least until He was settled in good. I had a close call with police. I will definitely make me safer! I lost a awesome ak47 mom.

If it was my son I would disown him he knows the cardnal rules and he is 8.... he is going to try me but he will never take family stuff else where what happens at our house stays at our house.

Thanks for reply LB. I hope your right about your own son. The main reason I never discussed things with my son, is he did not live me until he was 17. I had no reason to discuss it with him before that. Plus, he had a mom that raised him telling him what a piece of shit I was.

I'm glad this thread is getting attention. If it helps us all consider all angles, and will keep anyone else from this happening to them, then it's served a purpose. It also allows me to give back to this site and it's members for all the help and advice on the grow! Love y'all

 

[KUSHEATER1]

gotta have a bond with your children and talking is the key best of luck .remember after all he is still (your) son...

 

[Lord Doobie]

Kids will look everywhere when you're away...especially if a door is mysteriously locked
I'm sorry to say you can never ever trust your son again

 

[Phillthy]

I found out yeeeears later that family is all you got in life. Family is family and that is that. HE made a huge mistake and will realize it someday. You, my friend did the right thing and got cleaned up and got rid of everything. You reacted as best you could with it being your son and all. I admire that... it is tough to do. He needs to learn that things in life aren't free and nothing goes without consequence. Make him earn his ride and his way though life now but again, family is family. He is still your son.

 

[antimatter]

I admit that your son sounds like a problem child, but you said it yourself you didn't even get to really see him until he was 17, so you had no take in raising him, don't blame him for what he did for the rest of your life, blame the education system and fascist laws we have. At 17 he has no control man even adults do that shit out of anger, and anger is a powerful emotion..the system isn't very good at integrating people, there's always gonna be a lot of nails that sticks out for a variety of reasons.

Since your probably not in a very Cannabis friendly area, people are more willing to turn people in for drug crimes, society labels us as criminals so that's what we are and you gotta accept that you were turned in for something that was illegal and that's just the nature of it, if your son turned you in for murder we wouldn't be saying hes a shithead, but thats just how they treat marijuana "HARD DRUGS" like its murder, In some cases murder gets you less time or none at all and you get to kill women and children...not all pot smokers are down to earth good people who are reluctant to turn people into the law.

 

[Octothorp]

Talk about knife in the back!

Sorry to hear about that. But i think you dealt with the situation well.