Welcome to the PTSD forum.

[Galvano]

my problem is my current mental state is so low that a trip scares me without having someone to be the voice of reason

I believe the key word is "assisted" as in "psychedelic assisted therapy", it is advisable to have a psychotherapist to guide you through the path, I won't try to heal myself just by taking psychedelic (not the first few times, at least).

In this regard I would recommend reading Michael Pollan's "How to change your mind", the first chapters are a historical reconstruction of use (therapeutic and recreational) of psychedelics in western culture, from the 1950s to the present day. There's also a chapter on the author's experiences (with clandestine "guides") but the chapters that I found most interesting are "The Neuroscience: Your Brain on Psychedelics" and "The Trip Treatment: Psychedelics in Psychotherapy".

I found this book truly enlightening.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/How_to_Change_Your_Mind
https://michaelpollan.com/books/how-to-change-your-mind/

Just my 2 cents.

Forgive my english ;-)

 

[billy_big_bud!]

@Galvano. thanks for your input and suggestions. i will definitely check out that book. i have heard it mentioned before but it slipped my mind.

 

[billy_big_bud!]

im delighted to discover my local library has the book. really looking forward to checking it out.

 

[Galvano]

If you read it let me know what you think.

 

[billy_big_bud!]

most definitely. thanks again.

 

[Galvano]

You're welcome

 

[Cool Moe]

Thanks Slim for starting this thread and also to everyone for their input. I've been affected by trauma disorder for 45 of my 55 years but only for the last 15 have I begun to understand CPTSD. Such a variety of paths that put us here but at the end of the day the debilitating effects are quite similar. Recovery in my case has been elusive but the role that weed has played during a lifetime of coping has been profoundly appreciated. Much respect to Gypsy for hosting this site and to all the members for their contributions.

 

[billy_big_bud!]

just got the book today. looking forward to enlightenment...

 

[Switcher56]

... got mine last week. I haven't opened it yet. I must be in the right frame of mind

 

[billy_big_bud!]

another thing i am considering is micro dosing however my original plan was to do a heroic dose and then try micro dosing after but in my current situation i may try micro first just to see if there is a tangible benefit. anyone have any practical experience with micro dosing? here is an article i found encouraging. prior to this case psilocybin has only been available if you have a terminal illness. https://www.vice.com/en/article/4ad...e-with-depression-to-do-psychedelic-mushrooms the hard part is waiting for legislation to catch up with the real world. how many people will end their lives waiting for the government to get their shit together?

 

[billy_big_bud!]

im about 100 pages into the book. already i have gained some helpful insights. great book.

 

[Veggia farmer]

Micro dosing is very good actually to start with. Going heroic is not something I can recommend for a first time "trip", I did that the first time. Its just to much to get to know. The substance, the info your getting in(Input from the external world) and the broader sense of yourself.

When on this substances its normal to use 20%-40% of the brain. We usually use around 5? Sounds, light, feeling is more there for you, not in the subconscious. I went through some of my traumas on trip. Totally fine because I have a head that can take it and much experience with this. But if your ON so much you almost cant take your pants off to take a piss and in the same time maybe process some horrible stuff that people did or did not do to you, well, you better fu&%ing be in a safe place so you dont hurt yourself, physically and mentally. You must manage to come out on the other side, safe, or else you could get somewhat stuck in there. In our culture we say she/he never got down, went crazy or more traditinally use in "old" cultures they say your soul can be "stolen" by bad spirits. That is right, just maybe not take it in a literally christian way of viewing it.

This is the reason why we have a shaman... Seriously

 

[billy_big_bud!]

sounds like good advice veggia. i will be making my first order tomorrow for microdosing supplies from the online mushroom dispensary. im actually feeling borderline optimistic at the moment. im keeping my fingers crossed it is helpful.

 

[billy_big_bud!]

supplies have arrived. im on the cusp of microdosing and im not sure what to think...i have read plenty of literature but i would love to hear from anyone with experience.

 

[Veggia farmer]

What did you get? I almost only eat Liberty Caps that I collect myself or friends where I live. I have not done so much microdosing to be honest. But threeshold for notable effect is 0,25g of cubensis on an average person. I have eaten 1, 3 or 5 mushrooms just a few times, hard to describe, less ego, more thought flow with out resistance from the ego? Since I dont know anything who you are and what situation your in, then I would give the same advice I would give on a general term on all substances. Start so low you wont feel anything, or just sliiiighly. Then work from there.

From Erowid :

Every individual reacts differently to every chemical.
Know your Body - Know your Mind - Know your Substance - Know your Source.

Erowid's dosage information is a summary of data gathered from users, research, and other
resources and should not be construed as recommendations. Individuals can respond
differently to the same dosage. What is safe for one can be deadly for another.

Start low with new substances.
Have trusted companion/guide/sitter/friend present and/or available.


Look into this: https://www.erowid.org/plants/mushrooms/mushrooms.shtml

I guess also shroomery would have tons of info.

Take care, and never rush the mushrooms in any way

 

[billy_big_bud!]

a variety of 50mg 25mg and 12mg caps so i can fine tune dosage. i got it from here. https://mushroomdispensary.com/

 

[Veggia farmer]

Alright, That is not a lot of mushroom in one capsule if its pure mushrooms and not an extract. Important if you didnt know, MAOI`s is big big no no to get the effect you are after. If you have medications or food that are in that group, the effect will change. MAOI`s slow down the metabolism so it give everything more effects than without. MAOI`s with some substances can be lethal. Not with mushrooms, but hey, knowledge is power.

The weird thing about mushroom from my experience is that one day just a little amount can give me so much X and strawberry fields... Other times, I can eat and eat, and its all in control and mellow. Maybe that just me, but that is me.

 

[billy_big_bud!]

im confused about what you are saying about MAOI? would you mind clarifying?

 

['Boogieman']

My brother was injured in Afghanistan (non war related) and has PTSD really bad. Weed never helped, I was always trying to get him to try different strains but he thinks about war a lot when he smokes. He actually got shitty with me because I told him I just haven't found the right strains for him but he believes weed will only make it worse.

 

[Galvano]

im confused about what you are saying about MAOI? would you mind clarifying?

MAOI: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monoamine_oxidase_inhibitor
Also: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ayahuasca

There is an episode ("Ayahuasca") in this netflix documentary series that explains the risks of associating some type/class of psychiatric medicine with ayahuasca/MAOI:
https://www.netflix.com/de-en/title/81044208