The Original O'l Farts Club.

[Gypsy Nirvana]

August 14th 2008 - Sulu Sea - Tigman Beach - Palawan - Gypsy with Zack - Sky and POW!

- Now who is going to fetch the stick from the sea for me?

 

[BrassNwood]

When I first arrived in Portland, we toured the Pittock Mansion and the tour was led by a very proper blue haired, pursed lipped, upturned nose old lady. When she showed us the shower, which had a flexible rosebud shower head at floor level, she presented it as a toe tester, to test the temperature of the water before stepping into the massive water flow from the multiple jets.

I followed the articulated tube running from the head to the valves and fell against the wall laughing when I noted it was labeled "Bidet."

I really wish the video had saved as this is a 50 gallon flush. Durango Co. USA Steam rail station.

 

[bigsur51]

good morning all you Cool Cats

from our front porch this morning

 

[Gypsy Nirvana]

Gypsy Nirvana - Luang Prabang - Laos - Mekhong River - 2009

 

[bigsur51]

never a dull moment around here

looks like the turkeys are heading north for the spring

 

[Gray Wolf]

View attachment 18983269

I really wish the video had saved as this is a 50 gallon flush. Durango Co. USA Steam rail station.

We saw porcelain bidets scattered all over Europe and North Africa, I attached a picture of one with gold plated fixtures from my hotel room in Tunis, but there is also a bidet hose that all old farts should be aware of, which is the answer to a maiden's prayer when it comes to the heartbreak of anal pruritus aka itchy butt.

I found the bidet hose in every restroom that I was in in Tunisia and after trying it out, my chronic anal pruritus was cured, where baby wipes and ointments only controlled it.

I bought two hose systems while I was there and installed them here at home, never to be bothered with an itchy butt thereafter.

 

[Gray Wolf]

never a dull moment around here

looks like the turkeys are heading north for the spring

View attachment 18983275


View attachment 18983276

How would you like to catch one those in the windshield at the posted 65 mph?

 

[Putembk]

Morning OFC. Damaging winds excepted here today. I need to check and make sure everything is tied down.

 

[Rgd]

 

[Mtn. Nectar]

Fry day with few lookers….
ganj on…..

 

[jokerman]

 

[CharlesU Farley]

Getting a little risqué for us older flatulent ones eh?

Funny all the same - keep me laughing guys - I'm on a 10 day countdown till they rip my chest open - can't sleep - so could use all the humour I can get - right now -

Sorry, but this isn't going to be humor, even though I hope some parts of it will make you laugh.

Well, you're 10 days away from "Reality Ranch" . Time to start prep work now, don't know your smoking/vaping history but if it's heavy, you got to start cutting back _now_. Go all edibles if you can, if ya can't, keep the amount of smoke/vapor going into your lungs at a _minimum_.

Anesthetic gas itself is highly irritable to the lungs, so they're going to be throwing out more mucus, which you're going to have to cough up. As I've already told you, a pillow will be your _best_ friend, you will hug it like you have hugged no one else in the world. The biggest factor on you getting the hell out of there as quickly as possible will be your ability to take big deep breaths and _cough_, even though it's going to hurt like hell.

That's why we call it Reality Ranch.

Don't know what your diet history is, although those cheesy potatoes looked outstanding the other day. One thing you definitely don't want to have to do after surgery, is sit on the crapper and strain to take a dump.

I know this sounds gross, but you're getting inside info here.

If you ordinarily don't have any digestive problems, just monitor what you eat and keep the fiber and fat content to a minimum a couple of days before surgery. If you have any problem whatsoever with constipation, it is imperative you start taking metamucil or some type of fiber _now_. Day or two before surgery, really watch what you eat and keep the fiber content to a minimum. Fruit juices, simple easily digestible carbs that kind of thing, low residual fiber is what you want. Anesthesia and opiate painkillers paralyze the gut muscles, so no intestinal peristalsis, so things you eat before surgery sit there... for a day or two. You don't want a bunch of future shit just hanging out in your intestines, causing you to sit on the crapper and strain to pinch a loaf, while you're struggling just to take a big deep breath and cough. A lot of patients know they're not going to be able to eat for a couple days after their surgery, so they really pig out the night before and eat a whole bunch of stuff that's just going to sit there. That's what you do _not_ want after surgery.

And one other thing and drill this into your head.

Do not pull out any tubes!


You will have tubes down your throat, your nose that goes into your stomach, one goes into your dick to drain urine, and lots of tubes will go into various veins and arteries. Even though you will be heavily medicated, there will still be some discomfort and in moments you may think, "I'll just pull this damn thing out and it'll make me feel better."

Trust me, it will _not_... especially the one in your dick. It has a big balloon attached at the end and if you try, you'll certainly wish that you didn't.

Harley just said I need to shut the fuck up because giving you all this inside info will cause you to want to cancel your surgery.

Surgery like you're going to have, while strange and alien to you, the people who will be taking care of you do this shit everyday, every week, every year. They're used to it and they will take great care of you. Just do what they say, and one more time:


Don't pull out any tubes!

Certain combative patients who won't stop trying to pull out their tubes, have their arms and legs tied, it's called four point restraints. And don't even get me started of what five point restraints are .

Harley just now interjected, since you are so physically fit and in great shape, you're going to do just fine.

And the very best part about this, is that you will have almost _no_ memory of the two or three days after your surgery.

It's after that that the fun begins and why I wrote this wall of words for ya, so you'll be prepared and know that you have to cough and won't strain when you have to eventually take a dump, and most importantly won't try to pull out any tubes.

Take care man!

 

[Magu🌈]

View attachment 18983284 View attachment 18983285 View attachment 18983286 Fry day with few lookers….
ganj on…..

Again I say, God bless you sir.

 

[oldfogey8]

Monkey infestation…

 

[jokerman]

posted this before and relate to this

 

[Magu🌈]

Gypsy Nirvana - Luang Prabang - Laos - Mekhong River - 2009
View attachment 18983273

Hey Gypsy. I got a question for you because you have been there. Do you think most cannabis plants from south east asia are very geneticaly similar? Or do you think there are large differences in plants from each country? I mean, it is wind pollinated. How much difference can there be over a few hundred miles.

 

[CharlesU Farley]

Ya - dogs are such innocent creatures - they are what you make them to a lessor or greater degree - and this morning I've been grieving HARD for what I once had and loved unconditionally - wish I could find that TIme Tunnel - and go back to 2011/2012 again - RIP ZACK - and the rest of the pack -
* below POW! - with her 2nd litter of pups - she had 4 litters in all -

View attachment 18983212

I hope that your Yorkie perks up - and lives on for a while yet mate

Dobie's got a special place in my heart, that's for sure.

 

[CharlesU Farley]

Mornin , Ol' Farts..
View attachment 18983259

Unfortunately these days I feel so much like Uncle Joe, who's moving kinda slow, so it would take me a _very_ long time to take care of those ladies.

 

[Putembk]

Hey Gypsy. I got a question for you because you have been there. Do you think most cannabis plants from south east asia are very geneticaly similar? Or do you think there are large differences in plants from each country? I mean, it is wind pollinated. How much difference can there be over a few hundred miles.

Good question. One thing is for sure...there is a difference between indoor and outdoor grows!

 

[CharlesU Farley]

We saw porcelain bidets scattered all over Europe and North Africa, I attached a picture of one with gold plated fixtures from my hotel room in Tunis, but there is also a bidet hose that all old farts should be aware of, which is the answer to a maiden's prayer when it comes to the heartbreak of anal pruritus aka itchy butt.

I found the bidet hose in every restroom that I was in in Tunisia and after trying it out, my chronic anal pruritus was cured, where baby wipes and ointments only controlled it.

I bought two hose systems while I was there and installed them here at home, never to be bothered with an itchy butt thereafter.

View attachment 18983277

Harley just said that would be the cure to our underwear situation.

As we remind each other, even Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston have skid marks.

Seriously, we've been thinking about getting one of those jacked up toilet seat additions, with the heated water and all the accessories but that hose idea is quite intriguing.

Down the rabbit hole I go!