Security Guards

[Tarkus]

When I notice they are looking at me, I like to turn down an aisle and wait. Wait til they make their way around the corner you just went around and walk out right in front of them (I have startled more than a few). I then usually just stand at the corner, looking at one particular item for a really long time. Wait until the security guard looses interest (may take a while), and walks away. Or I turn and look at the security guard, right at them. Makes them uncomfortable.

Either that or you can load up a shopping cart full of stuff, and just walk it to the front door and leave it. Don't push the cart out of the door, and don't pay for it. Just leave it as you exit the door.

Or tell the security guard there is an old man following you suspicously....

 

[Speeding Mullet]

Alternatively, come and find me and ask me, I'd be alot nicer than the security guard about it, and knowledgeable.
The reason that the security guards are so up on it at the moment is because 83% of B+Q's in store losses are through known theft, it accounts for millions of pounds lost a year.
Even so, I hate the feeling of being watched in a shop. Alot of times if I clock someone watching me I just stand there and watch them right back until they can't take the pressure and look away.

SM

Edit - Most of the security cameras in B+Q stores are fake.

 

[Grenouille]

Edit - Most of the security cameras in B+Q stores are fake.

o rly

 

[Guest]

Ahh yes, over the years I've had to deal with this alot. I look a bit younger then my age, so on top of dressing the way I do and being out in the early AM I tend to get watched alot. I usually ignore them, along time ago I just decided if I'm not doing anything illegal then I'm just not going to give anyone the time of day if I don't want to. Even grow supplies at a large chain store, it doesn't matter because no one knows what your doing with it.
If I'm in a good mood I'll screw around with security if they don't leave me alone, but in the whole picture it's harmless. I guess I just learned to ignore the stares of others.
If you think it's hard in those situation, don't even try going into crowded places with a head full of acid. You will get use to ignoring people staring real quick.

 

[Speeding Mullet]

o rly

Yeah, but don't get caught, otherwise it's

SM

 

[Suby]

I am an ass when it comes to security guards, I call them rent-a-cops.
Last time that happened to me I had the fucker show me where everything was, if he's going to follow me around he might as well be helpfull.
I have police cars follow me because of my ride, when i get to the video store and walk out with a baby seat they get this retarted look on their faces lol.
It's frustrating to feel like a criminal when the rules you break are unjust and exist only to protect the already rich and powerfull.
Don't let the rent-a-cop get you down, try calling him Mr. Furley next time, if he's old he'll get it .

Suby

 

[captredeye]

People do that to me sometimes, but im usually high as hell when i notice it. I want to say something about it to them but I'm afraid I'm just paranoid or something. Being the curious bastard I am, it sucks just walking away without knowing what they want.

 

[Gangabiss]

I did actually stare him down at one point and he asked if I was looking for something and I said 'No I'm just looking...I'm not gonna steal anything, you're alright'
He gave me a weird look and pretty much left me alone after that lol

 

[Guest]

Chill, Winston. It's me.

Charlie knows it's me,
what's the problem?

The problem is, Willie,
Charles and yourself

are not the quickest of cats
at the best of times.

So do as I say and keep
the fucking cage locked!

- What is that?

- That's Gloria.

I know that's Gloria.
What's that?

Fertiliser.

You went out six hours ago
to buy a money counter.

You come back with
a semi-conscious Gloria

and a bag of fertiliser.

Alarm bells are ringing, Willie.

We need fertiliser, Winston.

We also need a money counter.

This money's gotta
be out by Thursday.

I'm buggered
if I'm gonna count it.

If you do have to buy
sodding fertiliser,

could you be
a little more subtle?

What do you mean?

We grow copious amounts
of ganja, yeah?

Yeah.

And you're carrying a wasted
girl and a bag of fertiliser.

You don't look your average
horti-fucking-culturalist.

That's what I mean, Willie.

 

[TrichomusCaesar]

Lock, stock, and 2 smoking barrels.....probably my favourite movie of all time....bifta, you are the man You forgot to add the part where winston mentions the wasted girl though. lol

 

[Guest]

dont conceal items, the moment you make an item look as though it is yours or take it out of plain view such as a cart, or ur hand, its retail theft. i hate it when your just followed around the store by an employee or some shit period and i never steal anything. i'm an honest guy.

 

[Reinhold]

If there doing it to you and your not doing anything wrong then do it right back to them lol. Seriously though just give em a good stare down, and mention to them that your going to contact the manager because their making you uncomfortable. Should work, cause I mean hey like I said if your not doing anything wrong, then you have every right to walk the store without being followed around like a criminal.

 

[GOT_BUD?]

I got followed by a security gaurd once when I was a young 'un. So I started to pile things into my arms as if I were going to buy them, turned to the old bugger, and aksed him "if he could give me a hand if he was just going to follow me around anyways." He didn't follow me anymore, and I got to shop in peace after that.

 

[Guest]

Lock, stock, and 2 smoking barrels.....probably my favourite movie of all time....bifta, you are the man You forgot to add the part where winston mentions the wasted girl though. lol

ha oh yeah how could i forget Gloria! ::edited::

 

[specialk]

You should have asked him for some gardening tips, whats the best compost they stock and what nutrients it got

 

[Deft]

Drop your pants and take a shit on the floor, if he stares ask him for some privacy lol.
But seriously, if your not stealing anything just ask him to hold everything you have thus far and leave.

 

[WolfSpider]

personaly (you can ask my wife about this too) i just moon them if thay keep fallowing me around.

 

[Gangabiss]

personaly (you can ask my wife about this too) i just moon them if thay keep fallowing me around.

lmao I'm afraid I don't have the balls to do that...that would be hilarious though

 

[robobond]

Recreation of wolf caught in the act.




Then the security guard is all like.

 

[WolfSpider]

Recreation of wolf caught in the act.




Then the security guard is all like.

now theres a reaction i havent gotten yet.