parents of IC

[TrustNoOne]

my plan with my boy is to tell him and show him nothing until he asks about it, and then i have no idea what i'll say. right now he never sees the grows or any para as everthing is under lock and key and nothing is ever left out in view. basically i won't allow myself to put that kind of burden on the little guy. i don't want him to have to lie or even think about having to lie. i've got a few friends that are open about it and their kids are just fine and fun to be with but i have thought about it lots and this is, i think, will be the best way for my son.
i'd love him to know and understand the foolishness of prohibition but i'll just go with whatever comes up and give him info as i feel he needs it. we live in a very small and conservative community so my biggest fear is not about him and drugs but something ever happening with me and him having to be known as the kid of a "dealer" and seeing me a few times a year behind the glass. that is truly my only worry in life.

 

[Sheriff Bart]

so is there just a locked room in the house: "off limits, dont ask, dont tell"?
lol!

 

[Chamba]

I have four children and not one of them know that I grow or that I smoke.

(if they are older than 11 and you grow in the same house or property)

are you sure?....

what about the smoke smell on your clothes, hair and breath?....

the best thing to do is to explain to your kids when they are old enough, 3 ~8?, that each family has things that other people should not know about...and there are things that many people do in their house that have to be a secret....use farting while watching TV as an example....then gradually work that around to Daddy's "tobacco" plants.

but then again I don't live in the Land of the Free (aka 1962 East Germany) lol

do the US Stasi that visit schools in the hope of busting parents with a few pot plants try to bust other types of drugs? .....shouldn't they be showing pictures of heroin needles and and meth pipes rather than pot leaves?....sheeesh!

 

[Sheriff Bart]

oh daddy what red eyes you have!

 

[Kailua Kid]

We were always open with our kids. Never hiding the smoking or the growing. We did take the time to explain to them that our fascist freedom hating government would have no problem putting us in prison or sending them to state sponsored abuse centers (group homes) because they hated this plant that brought joy and enlightenment to so many people.
We didn't subject our kids to the state run programing centers (pre-school) or allow them to be programed via the propaganda box. (TV) By the time they started school (1st grade) they could read and write and they knew the difference between freedom and fascism.
I can't understate the importance of teaching your kids to reason. When your kids have the ability to reason, and all the information, you can expect them to make reasonable decisions.

 

[easyrasta]

My kids are 26,girl, 21, boy and 19 girl.
I believe they learn best by example. They are very respectfull to older people moreso than with their own parents. They have had to share their space, food and home with many different types of people with very different attititude and upbringing. When they experienced prejudice at the public school, it was very foriegn to them. They couldnt understand why people were being so dumb.
As far as drug use, they were allowed to form their own opinion, i never smoked in their presence as children( i do now lol).
My oldest doesnt indulge but the other two do.
I further believe that we can learn or relearn alot from them. Their zest for life and discovery of new things is important to even the oldest man.

 

[TrustNoOne]

i totally agree with your logic jj and also agree with the fact that you don't know if your wrong or right. if someone is in a situation or a place that you can educate or enlighten a child without risk of arrest or time then i wish them well. you've made a choice and now lets see how it plays out. i truly feel i will not harm my child or create a situation where he will fell that he is lesser or lower of a person if he doesn't know what his father does every moment of the day.
within 6 months or so i won't have a plant in the house so i'm not that stressed about my son(7 yr old) finding what is there now. what i do know is that he will be able to go to any college or university in the world, without debt, when he is ready, and that is very importent to me. i didn't graduate from a high school and that's just another conversation that will happen and that i have no idea how to handle until that time, lol.

 

[Chamba]

I have a large area that is a "workshop". They come in when Im in there and a false wall hides everything. Because all my tools are in this area it is locked when I'm not in there. The oldest is 10 and honestly I have gotten used to the setup and it's quite easy to hide it.

sounds like an ideal set-up!

 

[esbe]

i wont hide anything from my lil boys, im proud of my plants and think that its a much better drug than alcohol. alcohol is the main legal drug here in denmark and almost all killing, car accident and violence is related to alcohol. i would like my boys to chose canna as their favorite drug when they grow older. they are to small to understand for now but when once ask me what and why im smoking i will explain. they both like to be with me and the plants and help me as good as they can. they see their father active and interested in taking care of the plants and learn to respect the plant and invironment. i dont want my boys to go to smoking clubs and pushers when they are older, so much criminal stuff and hard drugs there. so i will teach them to grow if they like.

 

[Farmer John]

Same situation with alocohol here esbe, I guess you know how it is in here...and exactly my thoughts, Im proud of my plants and if he wants to know what they are I tell him, just like my father told me about those small colombians in the attic 25 years ago or so...

 

[Guest]

I havent made it through the whole thread yet, just wanted to reply before my inspired thoughts became tangled...

_______WARNING____ONTHECOUCH_FEELS_STRONG_ABOUT_TOPIC____POSSIBLE _RANT_IMMINENT_________
I have 1 kid, almost 5. I have acted very foolish in his presence (im bi-polar and the like) and was in jail for around 6 months of his life. That said, we have a relationship no movie could show you. It is magic, and he is insanely intelligent, shows me many things. Part of this is due to the fact that I dont worry about financial problems. ie. I work a contract, or for 3/4 months, living small, then I can take 2/3 months completely off. I am NOT financially stable, by most standards, but me and his mom have provided for him with relatively few problems. Me and my unmarried partner (looking for something that feels right, not orthodox priest/marraige) are somewhat bohemian. We absolutely did not want to put him in a daycare, with people that go home and do god knows what. We give him patience, imagination, truth, and respect.

Since he was 2, we talked to him like he understood everything we said, breaking down days as "suns/moons" when necessary, but usually creating conversations with him, and asking his opinion on some decoration or dinner. Even if I don't really take it into consideration, I take the time to try and find out what he likes. Me and him wrestle, fight, play troll and knight, slayer and dragon, and on and on, please do not neglect the stimulation of physical action with them. I often buy costumes or play weapons to make this crazier. We also share 'truths' with little interesting myths, Orions belt for example, we havent seen it in about 3 months now, we moved, but he recalls it time to time, and as he grows, I'll tell him more about the history of such things. Truth is also addressing that there are a lot of people out there that you have to be strong or stand up against, and there is nothing wrong with that, it's what should be done

Again, time and attention. If he's scared to sleep in his own bed, see if you can move a sleepiing bag or cot into your own room, why should a 5 year old have to sleep 50ft of hallway away? Consideration.

To summarize how I feel

1.Respect and show understanding to them
2.How is he/she going to take in what you, and the world around are giving out?
3.Give their mind something to enjoy, feed on, imagination, music, live shows, rhymes....I even share poetry with him sometimes, and not elementary stuff...you can see it...the words are mystical and exotic in origin to him

4. Bonus step - watch avatar the last airbender with them

5. Most important, just play with them, get on their level, whatever it is

really, encourage growth and show interest in what they offer, all of it,

as for TV, not much for or against, though cant really stand the nick tv/mtv(any reality type show) look, too many over beautiful children made to look like life is no problems with beauty and money, ...some cartoons, mostly the classics on DVD though, keeps him from channel surfing (popeye, woody the woodpecker, its amazing what a great time you can have watching past times, while they see 'new' cartoons.) I also have a huge screen for the video games, i cut him off from time to time, but at this young age, you gotta encourage just about anything they do, it's not bad for them, many games have deep stories and some simple puzzles, the stories though, way presented, help kids, 'they' feel more attached to character perhaps, helps them 'relate' events, IMO

in case wondering, yes i usually smoke around my child, sometimes he has said things (refering to our smoke) that were funny and very uncomfortable, fortunately only around us. We do try to explain now that it's kinda like a secret, that you can get in trouble forit, but for ridiculous reasons, and that most people who do it are not bad guys for that fact alone. Hard, very hard to put into words, the situation that needs to be understood. I don't plan on sending him to public schools, esp. not right away, too many reasons to list here, but if he insisted on kindergarden we would of course let him go, for sometime, yrs, until we think he needs improved education (inevitable with public schools). Anyway...yeah, I dont agree on teaching honesty as a strong value when keeping a regular smoking habit hidden.

But then again lies can be so interesting you can just throw the truth out the window some days...




Haha! I beat the forum phantom with C&P, use it or lose it

 

[Guest]

hello

great thread

I've got a 2.5 years old daughter
I'm waiting for my son to born in the following days ..... :smile:

much love and pride for your children, these are our future , our joy

:smile:

my son has borned and has 8 days old

mummy daddy and my daughter are the most happy people on Earth

send much love to all of you

:smile: