My daughters friend, need advise

[Pops]

I do speak Russian, but want nothing to do with fat,muscular women with a mustache.

 

[Guest]

Not since the divorce, eh, Pops?

 

[Guest]

wtf are 11 and 12 year olds doing with myspace anyways?
what the **** do they need a myspace for?
damn tell your kid to get the **** off the computer and go do some shit
myspace blows anyways

What he said^

 

[loflogro]

Yamaha, if it is something that bothers and concerns you as a parent (and it obviously does) then it is your job to put an end to it or make an honest attempt to curtail and educate. A few posters on here have taken the position of "Kids will do what they want" or "You'll come off as a tyrant"... that's some crappy advice from people that either don't have kids or are failing their children. Are children going to do what they want, to a point, yes... to what extent will vary from child to child of course, but you can put that voice in your child's head that says no, put the road block up that makes it harder to do certain things, put consequences in place and be a PARENT. You can also put in place rewards as well, parenting isn't always a tyrant stance, although sometimes necessary, but often times a positive approach can be effective as well. But you're not her friend, you're not in her top 8 on myspace, you're her Father. When she's all grown up, your relationship can evolve into more of a "Friend", but that doesn't come until she is older and mature enough to use proper judgment, but if you don't instill that judgment and character now then you won't have a friend when she gets older and you will not only increase her chances of going down a bad path, you will foster it by turning a blind eye to things. If you don't teach her what you feel appropriate, someone else will and I promise you won't agree. My Father was fairly strict, and I still did a lot of things... the things I did would pale in comparison to the things I would have done if I hadn't had his guidance and voice in the back of my head. We are in a position that we want people to be understanding and open to our use of marijuana, but we often blur that line and think that means that we should take a live and let live approach in all aspects of life. That's ignorance, there are places for boundaries, this is one. Don't fail your daughter, don't let MySpace raise her, don't miss out on the future you two could have by letting her do everything she wants now. Nobody ever said being a parent is easy, but I wish you the best in dealing with things.

 

[Stoner4Life]

you're a prime example of bad parenting imo. 11 and she has her own cell phone and unrestricted internet access. Now it's turning into the pile of shyt you fear, bummer but guess who LET THAT happen? an 11 yr old DOES NOT need a cell phone, and NEVER has unrestricted internet access, did her whining and bytching that all her friends have this (and then so must she) turn you into a turnip? it sounds to me like you let her friends set her standards in life....... THAT WAS YOUR JOB. have fun trying to unravel the shytstorm that lies ahead of you. Go ahead and try to take something from someone who thinks they're entitled....... lmfmfao

The thread might better have been titled....... "Help I fvcked up" but to go and blame what's happening in your daughters world on her friend is EXACTLY the kind of irresponsible behavior that got you to this point. And why is that 12 yr old still her friend? When my folks caught me with ill behaved friends I was forbidden to see them anymore. Robbie LLoyd set fires---end of friendship. Your daughters friend is a horny little bytch @ 12 by the sounds you're making, WHY IS SHE STILL A FRIEND? Does she need to be turning tricks before you no longer allow the friendship to continue?

Now, I'd have some respect and compassion if you'd been a real parent and this came out of nowhere. But to blame others, you suck!

Whoever gave her unrestricted access to the net and a cell phone is a fvcking idiot and is the ONLY ONE to blame. If she didn't have the net or a cell phone YOU wouldn't be here worrying. PERIOD! So at 11 you've created a monster you are afraid to confront or control. You are so fvcked when your girl starts thinking of sex as you have no control imo.

an 11 yr old with a cell phone? idiot. can't keep track of her w/o it? bad parenting.

I would not delete her myspace account, because she is only going to be pissed at you and create one behind your back. If you want your daughter to become a level headed, mature individual then you have to treat her like one. Do not delete her account. I'm assuming your wife has an account to stay in contact with her friends, but if she has an account solely to watch over her daughter, then I would consider deleting your wife's account. Your daughter is going to come into contact with a lot of things that you would consider inappropriate. But it important to remember to let your daughter run her own life and determine what the correct decision is.

Jesus Christ almighty! She's 11 NOT 16! She needs to be TOLD what to do. Really bad advice daisy jane. 11 is 11 and you TELL THEM what to do, that's too young to be learning from their mistakes because we're NOT talking Barbie Doll shyt here although she is of Barbie Doll age. The internet is a dangerous place for even adults nevermind kids. 11 yr olds DO NOT run their own lives and CANNOT make their own decisions. I'm surprised by the bad advice.

YAMAHA....... if you don't put your foot down we'll be seeing her on The Jerry Springer Show or bangbus.com sooner than you think. your kid is in trouble already.

 

[ToKEN]

I guess we will talk to her. That has always been my train of thought, educate your kids properly and these things wont be an issue.

well man it seems that you're really worried about your kid hearing swear words and sex.. but dude..myspace or not, I'm sure she hears those words at least 420 times a day in middle school. I know I did...and I know my parents hated it to. You just want to bring your child up in the perfect environment, but that's not going to happen. Your kids friends have a big influence on what she thinks and there really isnt anything you can do to change that...all you can do is talk to them and let them know your whole feeling on the situation and that you think it is wrong.

she isn't a "child" anymore so that means all you can really do is just talk to them because she's making her own decisions now...so the best you can hope for is your voice in the back of her head telling her to do the right thing.

best of luck yamaha...I'm sure she'll turn out to be a fine young woman.



peace, love and unity
ToKEN

 

[yamaha_1fan]

Stoned4Life, you must not have a kid anywhere near this age category. Just about every kid her age has a myspace account, kids at school, kids she plays sports with, etc. They exchange myspace addies like they drink gatorade. As far as a cell phone, its more of a status thing. The kids text each other all the time. Plus I would rather have her friends call her cell phone then my house bothering me. My daughter is never unsupervised. Even trips to the mall include someones parent.

I know she hears those words 400 times a day. 200 come from me !!!! But she knows not to repeat them.

I was OK with the bulletins that say " I love Tommy" or " Bobby + Jenny forever". As a dad, I cringe but I know its inevitable. Even the girl cursing I was shocked that she did it in a bulletin and that her mom saw that. But the virgin thing was pushing it. Whats next? "Anal sex verus Doggy STyle" Or " Who do you think gives the best head?"

Like I said, shes a good kid, straight A's, advanced classes, plays sports, outgoing, gets along with everyone. We give her some leeway cause I do believe that when you try to stop certain things, they will find ways to do it behind your back. I would rather know everything.

My girl has been using a computer since she was 3-4 using educational CD's. Eventually she got her own box, after we upgraded in our business. Now she gets the hand me downs (we upgrade every couple years so she still gets decent boxes).

We moved to bible country and we are by far some of the more open parents


I appreciate everyones advice

 

[Guest]

you're a prime example of bad parenting imo. 11 and she has her own cell phone and unrestricted internet access. Now it's turning into the pile of shyt you fear, bummer but guess who LET THAT happen? an 11 yr old DOES NOT need a cell phone, and NEVER has unrestricted internet access, did her whining and bytching that all her friends have this (and then so must she) turn you into a turnip? it sounds to me like you let her friends set her standards in life....... THAT WAS YOUR JOB. have fun trying to unravel the shytstorm that lies ahead of you. Go ahead and try to take something from someone who thinks they're entitled....... lmfmfao

The thread might better have been titled....... "Help I fvcked up" but to go and blame what's happening in your daughters world on her friend is EXACTLY the kind of irresponsible behavior that got you to this point. And why is that 12 yr old still her friend? When my folks caught me with ill behaved friends I was forbidden to see them anymore. Robbie LLoyd set fires---end of friendship. Your daughters friend is a horny little bytch @ 12 by the sounds you're making, WHY IS SHE STILL A FRIEND? Does she need to be turning tricks before you no longer allow the friendship to continue?

Now, I'd have some respect and compassion if you'd been a real parent and this came out of nowhere. But to blame others, you suck!

Whoever gave her unrestricted access to the net and a cell phone is a fvcking idiot and is the ONLY ONE to blame. If she didn't have the net or a cell phone YOU wouldn't be here worrying. PERIOD! So at 11 you've created a monster you are afraid to confront or control. You are so fvcked when your girl starts thinking of sex as you have no control imo.

an 11 yr old with a cell phone? idiot. can't keep track of her w/o it? bad parenting.

Jesus Christ almighty! She's 11 NOT 16! She needs to be TOLD what to do. Really bad advice daisy jane. 11 is 11 and you TELL THEM what to do, that's too young to be learning from their mistakes because we're NOT talking Barbie Doll shyt here although she is of Barbie Doll age. The internet is a dangerous place for even adults nevermind kids. 11 yr olds DO NOT run their own lives and CANNOT make their own decisions. I'm surprised by the bad advice.

YAMAHA....... if you don't put your foot down we'll be seeing her on The Jerry Springer Show or bangbus.com sooner than you think. your kid is in trouble already.

s4l just cuz your mom, sister, and daughter all turned out to be whores and had multiple appearances on the jerry springer show where they all fought over the same guy (your grandpa), that doesn't mean that every little girl will turn out that way if they aren't watched like a hawk

lol s4l you are really a pathetic ****in loser... i don't know what i did to piss you off so much that you constantly find random posts of mine just to give me neg rep and leave some kind of nasty comment.. i must have really made you get your panties in a wad to piss you off that much... but oh well cuz i really don't give half a damn about this karma crap, it's just fun to see that you care SOO much about it and about whatever it was i said to you to piss you off. keep wasting your time on that shit, douchebag, it's really entertaining

Edited By Moderator. Do NOT post any part of any private message, whether received thru the pm system or reputation system. Please re read the TOU, others have been banned for this.

 

[KharmaGirl]

Uner.. remove the l'il excerpt from the rep comment or I will....your call

 

[nycdfan042]

my space destroys childrens youth...makes em grow up too quick...what about that girl who hng herself because a mom across the street made up a fake persona and fed her lies and played mind games. To me those social networking sites are poison, they dont have any value except to spread gossip, introduce people who are gonnna eventually bone or to link up to do bad things under the radar of their parents. i made alotta friends off thei nternet buti was over 16 and i really think anything under that age is waaay too young to make choices friends and relationships online. If you ask me parents need to watch their kids closely and monitor everything they do at least untill 16 yrs old. Not tosay a 16yr old is grown enough to make sound choices but 11, 12 yrs old?? paroozing my space??? crazy shit.

I can relate my girlfriends little sister who is 12 is on my space, and ive been with her and her friends away fromt he parents and beleive me my gf's little sister is a totaly different person alone with her friends than she is with her parents. What im saying is kids now a days are jeckyl and hyde str8 up. I remember listening to some 12yr olds talk freely while i was a few yrds away, total strangers on the street but they seemed to like talking out loud sort of showing off, cursing..talkin about sex, being very vulgar andkinda disgusting just for the shock value of it. Some kids are jut doing that..talkin for the sake of talking because the subject is taboo, but thent here is the youngsters who are serious who are cuious about drugs and sex and myspace , facebook...those social sites provide a perfect haven for them. Adults willing to take advantage...other like minded naughty kids meet up and have a ball doing things their parents would freak out over. If i was their age id say let me make up my own mind, but now that im older it really limits a childs chance at developing and understanding things are a opportune moment rather than being force fed this crap and forced to make a choice right then and there, nothing good can come of it. My child when i ahve one will be banned from myspace untill at least 16, sorry thats just the way i see it...myspace and those sites are just places an 11 yr old does not belong....and im not about to spy on my kid either hopefully a simple talk is all you need to show her that these web sites arent all good....good luck man i see how tough it is to raise a good kid these days..its like they dont have a chance from birth...

 

[Guest]

dude every 11 year old kid is completely different around their friends than they are around their parents. at least i know i was. and so was every kid starting at 11 and older.

 

[Guest]

what the heck i edited my message and removed the pm and then you still re-edited it

 

[KharmaGirl]

Sorry dude. Gave you an hour... when I came back it was still there......No biggie, just watch next time. No use getting in trouble for something silly.

 

[George Hayduke]

tell your kid its cold as **** up here and i need someone to chop wood for me.

that'll get her off the myspace. shit, i was workin for my dad at 11.

No he sounds like a dad trying to do the best he can to give his daughter room to grow and express herself. Sounds to me as he has a good line of communication going on and he's trying hard to protect her from growing up too fast.

nah, i was just saying don't worry about being a "liberal" or "conservative" when it comes to raising your children. just be a parent and stop worrying about what title you fall under. if your considered more "Conservative" because you don't want your child exposed to the utter filth on myspace then so be it.

 

[Guest]

Actually, George, I didn't mean for that comment to be directed at you. It was in response to someone else. I agree with you. Don't worry about how you are pereceived as a father...just be one. And it seems as the thread starter is concerned with just that-being a good dad.

 

[George Hayduke]

ahhh, cool man i have to agree with you too at least he cares. most parents give there kids a computer, cell phone, etc. without any thought of it. i'm sure as hell glad i don't have kids in this day in age. it gotta' be hard with all the utter bullshit thats out there for them. well im gunna take a bong rip and go on a hike now... its nice and sunny out.

have a nice day.

 

[Guest]

Don't forget to leave bread crumbs so you can find your way back. Enjoy nature.

 

[motaco]

I would be the worst parent on earth.


all my answers would be "hell you should've seen me at your age ya lil pope"

seriously my friends were like the boys of southpark at 11 and 12. started smokin herb at 12.

we turned out alright though

 

[danktown]

^word motaco...for some reason some of my crazier friends, (i.e. first ones to start doin other substances, drinking, getting arrested) are starting to become the more responsible citizens as i start to notice my old peers and myself get older...the ones that were sheltered and came from more conservative backgrounds are the ones that end up ****ing up and discovering things later on ime

yamaha...i think u know what youre doing, the friends of mine who had or were raised by parents like you turned out great, im sure your daughter will too, let her figure things out for herself she seems smart enough the way u speak about her...take it easy, stay green!

 

[Guest]

that's very true danktown, i've noticed that too. a lot of the kids that are the type of kids you don't want your daughter to be or to hang around, like kids that use drugs and get into trouble and drink like crazy and have sex at a young age, actually turn out to be the most mature, well-adjusted people later in life. it's like they grow up so much when they're young that they end up being more mature later. then again a lot of those kids also end up in prison or on drugs for basically their entire lives, but the ones that have a good head on their shoulders and are able to stop using drugs and get their shit together, end up having their shit a lot more together later in life than someone who was raised more conservatively and never did drugs and never had to get their shit together. know what i mean?