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Just hold her, love her, kiss her. Let her know its alright to let go. The two of you don't have to be brave for each other anymore. Live a lifetime in each and every second you have left together. And when those lifetimes have passed, and youre ready, its alright for you to let go too.
Yes cherish the fact that you have had this time. So many don't.
You have to find peace ware you find peace. Don't find it... let it find you. I can only extend my hand for advice as an outsider. As I can only imagine your pain and sorrow. I lay here next to my wife thinking man what would I do. I have no idea but Ill tell you this. I know she would want me to go on the best I could for the rest of the family and to dedicate my life to them the best I could. Be there for them. Not to run off and join a monastery. Those places are for someone who never seaked a family only god and do not have anything else, you have allot of family.
I saw the movie EAT PRAY LOVE with Julia Roberts idk I beleive you will find yourself there.
But your grandkids won't understand, and they need you. My kids no nothing of either of their grandfathers they both died before they ever meet them my father and my wifes father both died 3 months apart.
Trust me It pains me everyday that they never got to meet and know their grandfather. But if you think its best then so be it.
Try watching The Family Stone that would be me. Seeing my wife in them and cherish what has been given to me and what I have lost and the story of my life.
All my best My freind. Be strong and time and only time will help you through this.
And Im sorry if have seemed crass in anyway. My prayers.
There are no words or deeds with which I can remove the incredible burden of pain you must now be experiencing. May you find peace in the knowledge that her suffering will end. May strength of will and cherished memories see you through the dark road upon which you are walking. None should have to experience the hole left in their being by a love no longer able to be fulfilled.
I am pleased to report that she is still with us. She is still very weak, but she may have turned the corner or this may be the lull before the final storm. They are going to start chemo next week and I don't agree with the treatment, but Mrs. MPD is behind it so that's that. She might be feeling better in a week if she makes it that far. We'll just have to see. She's got spunk for hanging in there. I really didn't think she was going to make it, but after three (3) trips to the emergency room she is stable for the time being.
I don't know how much gas she has left in the tank, the poor thing. She is down to 86 pounds! She looks like a concentration camp survivor and I worry she is going to crash and burn at any second. She is spirited though! She just spent ten minutes bitching me out for fussing at my son the chef who has to prepare these wild-assed dishes for dinner that dirty every pot, pan, cup and saucer in the house! Ugh! Can't we just heat something up? What about take-out or delivery? LOL!
Damn.....that just made my heart heavy. I hope everything works out the best it possibly can. Stay strong and try and focus on all the good times. Most important thing is the "its not over" attitude. Live in the moment and enjoy each other....