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I refer to mine as "the old lady" or "the wife". We call each other babe. When we are fighting, It's just like everyone else, b*tch , super b*tch, b*tchface
Years ago I had a buddy whose wife gave him 4 kids in 3 years (twins the second time) referred to his wife as "Litter-shitter" when copious alcohol consumption was evident.
Nonplussed, her reply would be colorful variations on "Short-stuff".
One thing I'm very proud of is that in 15 plus years of marriage me and the Mrs. have never resorted to negative name calling like that. We both feel that if you truly love someone you can be mad at or upset with your significant other without having to resort to things like that.
Now that's not to say that people that do don't truly love their spouse, to each their own what works for one does not necessarily work for others.