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U.S. Roger, the giant kangaroo that looked like a bodybuilder, dies
USA TODAY USA TODAY Mon, Dec 10 7:37 AM CST
Roger, Australia's massive and muscly kangaroo, has died, a kangaroo sanctuary announced.
The alpha red kangaroo stood at about 6-feet and 7-inches tall. Photos of Roger went viral in 2015, not only because of his size, but because he was ripped. His biceps were impressively muscular and he had been known to crush metal buckets.
Roger was rescued by The Kangaroo Sanctuary in Alice Springs, central Australia, as a joey after his mother was killed.
Roger died of old age, the sanctuary announced Saturday. He was 12 years old.
"He lived a lovely long life and was loved by millions around the world," the sanctuary said in a statement posted to Facebook. "We will always love you and miss you Roger."
Last night I took my first and last "dab", let me explain. My friend brings over his rig and sets it up for my virgin dab, I have been smoking flower for years and have never had edibles or dabs. The first thing I noticed was the top of my head came off, my skull exploded and I coughed hard enough that I am pretty sure I lost one of my lungs. I sat back in my favorite chair, a lazy boy designed especially for stoners. I would guess 30 minutes passes and I open my eyes and my friend is gone, I am unable to move my body, but I know one thing for sure, I have to piss. I can not move my legs so I reach for the empty beer glass next to me on the table and proceed to pee in it , it turns out to be quite the ordeal and sends me into another 30 minutes of comatose chair time. Upon my second awakening I realize I have the worst dry mouth I have ever had, like I had been chewing on cotton balls and sand. I reached for my beer glass which was 3/4ths full of that beautiful golden lager that quinches my thirst every time. Yes, my fellow ents, I downed that mellow yellow like it was last call at a saloon. Much to my stoned surprise I realized it was piss and even more to my surprise it didn't taste all that bad, a little salty aftertaste but I would give it 4 stars if I was forced to give a score. Wait, this story gets better, 2 or 3 minutes pass and my stomach starts to churn and I projectile vomit all over my pants and chair. I fall into a stupor and go to sleep only to be awaken by my lovely wife who immediately thinks ( based on the smell) her husband has pissed his pants. I wrongly admit that is exactly what has happened, and today I walk with my head held high in the knowledge that she still doesn't know she married quite possibly the foulest bastard that ever lived. TRUE STORY