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Most Functional English Word

RED145

RED145

Member
THE MOST FUNCTIONAL ENGLISH WORD

Well, it's shit ... that's right, shit!
Shit may just be the most functional word in the
English language.

Consider:
You can get shit-faced, Be shit-out-of-luck, Or
have shit for brains.

With a little effort, you can get your shit
together, find a place for your shit, or be asked to
shit or get off the pot.

You can smoke shit, buy shit, sell shit, lose
shit, find shit, forget shit,
and tell others to eat shit.

Some people know their shit, while others can't
tell the difference
between shit and shineola.

There are lucky shits, dumb shits, and crazy
shits. There is bull shit, horse shit, and chicken
shit.

You can throw shit, sling shit, catch shit,
shoot the shit, or duck when the shit hits the fan.


You can give a shit or serve shit on a shingle.

You can find yourself in deep shit or be happier
than a pig in shit.


Some days are colder than shit, some days are
hotter than shit, and some days are just plain
shitty.

Some music sounds like shit, things can look like
shit, and there are times when you feel like shit.

You can have too much shit, not enough shit, the
right shit, the wrong shit or a lot of weird shit.

You can carry shit, have a mountain of shit, or
find yourself up shit creek without a paddle.

Sometimes everything you touch turns to shit and
other times you fall in a bucket of shit and come
out smelling like a rose.


When you stop to consider all the facts, it's the
basic building block of the English language.

And remember, once you know your shit, you don't
need to know anything else!!
You could pass this along, if you give a shit; or
not do so if you don't give a shit!

Well, Shit, it's time for me to go. Just wanted
you to know that I do give a shit and hope you had a
nice day, without a bunch of shit. But, if you
happened to catch a load of shit from some
shit-head...........

Well, Shit Happens!!!

Aint that some shit!! :wave:
 
G

Guest

So this what you come up with to amuse yourself because you have dial up and can't watch Youtube videos? I guess you're just shit out of luck, ain't ya? lol
 
ToKEN

ToKEN

Registered Cannabis User
Veteran
have to agree to disagree red. though shit is often use...fuck can be used in almost every sentence as well...often used before the word shit "this fucking shit is CrAzY"

though I think if you're using cuss words...all can be used in place of something else. causing them to be the most functional english words
 
GOT_BUD?

GOT_BUD?

Weed is a gateway to gardening
ICMag Donor
Veteran
"Dude" is the only word in the english language where two people can carry on an entire conversation while using no other words.
 
asa42

asa42

Anime n Stoner Aficionado
shit makes me think of the south park episode where they said shit like just over 300 times... shit was fuckin great!
 
NOKUY

NOKUY

Active member
Veteran
I prefer FUCK:

FUCK!
Fuck is perhaps one of the most interesting and exciting words in the English language. Fuck is the one magical word which just by its sound can describe pleasure, pain, hate, and love. Fuck comes from the German word, "frikon".
In language, "fuck" falls into many grammatical categories.


Fuck can be used as a verb both transitive (he fucked her) and intransitive (she was fucked by him).
a active verb (he really gives a fuck),
a passive verb (she really doesn't give a fuck),
an adverb (she is fucking interested in him) and
a noun (she is a fine fuck).
an adjective (she is fucking beautiful).
As you can see there is a whole lot of real versatility with "fuck". It pops up everywhere. Besides its sexual connotation, this lovely word can be used to describe many situations:

GREETING - How the fuck are you?
FRAUD - I got fucked by that crook;
DISMAY - Oh, fuck it!;
TROUBLE - I'm fucked now!;
CONFUSION - What the fuck?!;
AGGRESSION - "Fuck you!";
DISGUST - "Fuck me"
DESPAIR - Fucked again!;
PHILOSOPHY - "Who gives a fuck?"
INCOMPETENCE - "He's a real fuck-off";
DISPLEASURE - "What the fuck is going on here?"
NUMEROLOGY - "Sixty-fuckin'-nine";
LOST - "Where the fuck are we?"
DISBELIEF - "Unfuckingbelievable
RETALIATION - Up your fucking ass!"
REBELLION - Fuck it!;
DISPLEASURE - What the fuck's going on?;
SATISFACTION - fuck me again!
Also as:

DESCRIPTIVE ANATOMY - "He's a fuckin' asshole!"
TO TELL TIME - "It's six-fucking-thirty."
PREDICTION - "Well, I'll be fucked!"
A POLITICAL STATEMENT - "Fuck Washington"
INCESTUOUS - "Motherfucker"
A PUT DOWN - "Fuck off, buster!"
ALL ENCOMPASSING - "Fuck 'em all!"
GOVERNMENTAL AFFAIRS - "Fuck the IRS"
A POKER HAND- "A royal fuck"
TO START A RELATIONSHIP - "Let's fuck now!"
AS AN ACCEPTANCE - "Fuckin' eh!"
ENJOYMENT - "Fuckin' Wow!" "
A CLOSING - "Fuckingly yours".
MATERNAL - "Motherfucker"
POLITICAL - Fuck Clinton!!
Never forget the quotes of some famous people in our history and in the present:

Michelangelo: "You want me to paint what on the fucking ceiling"
George Custer: Where did all these Fucking indians come from?
Einstein: "Any fucker can understand that"
Mayor of Hiroshima: What the fuck was that?
Heidi Fleuss: Fuck these celebrities!
Mayor Richard Daley: Fuck the heat - - Chicago IL
John Wayne: "Fuck death and the lung cancer he rode in on."
Bill Clinton: What the fuck's this inhaling thing?
Oliver North: You're all fucking liars!
Sean PennFuck: Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck etc.
Eddie Murphy: Fuck you, Fuck you, and Fuck you. Who's next?
Jack Nicholas: Fuck this for a lark, 1995 British Open
And last but not least, the immortal words of the captain of the Titanic, who said "Full speed ahead and fuck the iceberg" and five minutes later said "Where is all this fucking water coming from?
The mind fairly boggles at the many creative uses of the many creative uses of the word. How can anyone be offended when you say "FUCK"? Use fuck in your daily speech proudly. Fuck adds prestige to any conversextion. Put this colorful four letter word to work for you. Today tell someone you know "fuck you" ... or "Let's fuck!"

This is a disclaimer. We know the origin of the word FUCK. When the puritans settled what is now Salem, they had this issue about pre-marital sex, they didn't approve of it. Not that it should matter to anybody except the two or three etc people are involved in in the privacy of their own home. Well these butt-inskies decided that sex should be a crime, and orgasms should be outlawed. Strange, how they thought they had the right to suppress one of God's greatest gifts while doing this in the name of God. Well If two people were caught in the act of having sex or even thinking about having sex they were brought to trial.

If they were found guilty the crime they were committed of was "For Under Carnal Knowledge". They were put in the stockades and their crime was also carved in a piece of wood and placed over their heads. This was before the printing press or even before Black and Decker and God forbid Craftsman power tools (I like Craftsmans tools, even my chain saw is Craftsman). So all carving in wood had to be done not only by hand, but with handmade tools. Since they couldn't run over to England or Germany very easily, they didn't have any airplanes yet either, they had to try to conserve their tools and time. Just imagine carving the whole thing out when they could be out looking for young lovers to lock up or witches to burn at the stake. So they invented the acronym, which is a word or letter abbreviations for longer phrases. So if you were caught fucking around, and found guilty, you had the word F.U.C.K placed over your head while you spent time in the stockades. That is where the word came from and that is how it is associated with screwing. So please don't E-mail me and tell me that Fuck is not a German word. I fucking already know that. This is a joke, it is something to be laughed and enjoyed, I hope. By the way, I also know that the first part is not really correct either. If you want to bitch about this letter, Fuck You and go to alt.bitch.about.anything and complain. :)
 
Sheriff Bart

Sheriff Bart

Deputy Spade
Veteran
how the fuck did you two fucks fucking fuck these fucks fuck fuck!

well that certainly illustrates the diversity of the word...
 
G

Guest

My vote is for fuck.

It is short, simple and to the point and can be very useful in a number of situations.

Although I know at least a dozen different ways of asking someone to go away and leave me alone, to stop bothering me, to give me some personal space, I much prefer to rely on the good old FUCK OFF! Short, simple, to the point and it leaves the recipient in no doubt as to your meaning. If you want to be clearly understood, a nice, short, sharp FUCK OFF is far more effective and universal that explaing 'Look here, old chap, would you mind awfully if I were to ask you to retreat from my immediate vicinity as one is becoming more than a little perturbed by your presence' or 'Do you mind?'.

Shit and Fuck are two of the oldest words in the English language, Chaucer and Shakespeare both wrote them, I expect the Ancient Britons stood on the white cliffs of Dover 2000 years ago watching the Romans sail up the Solent to invade Britain and used both shit and fuck - Shit, the fucking Romans are coming! or Shit, fucking Romans! or Shit, now we're fucked!

Guttural words like shit and fuck are thought to be the very oldest words, probably people have been stubbing their toes and uttering one of them for time immemorial. Before the Romans came along and added greater complexity and diversity to our language, it is thought the Britons had a fairly unsophisticated language with few words of more than two syllables. The Romans called the non-Latin speaking tribes of northern Europe Barbarians because they thought their languages sounds like the noises sheep made - Baa Baa! Of course, the Barbarians didn't write their language down so we only have Roman accounts tainted with propaganda to go on by and large, but if i were a betting man I'd say the Ancient Britons spoke gutturally with few syllables, just like us folks up here in the far north today. The hill farmers where I live still speak authentic old Lakeland English, it's guttural and few syallable - 'shut fucking gate', rather than 'would you please shut the gate if you don't mind' 'shit fucking neet' rather than 'I say, what horrid weather we are having tonight'.

So I feel the full justification of cultural history every time I say shit of fuck or a number of other such words i won't type in case anyone is offended by them...
 
Last edited:
RED145

RED145

Member
NOKUY said:
I prefer FUCK:

FUCK!
Fuck is perhaps one of the most interesting and exciting words in the English language. Fuck is the one magical word which just by its sound can describe pleasure, pain, hate, and love. Fuck comes from the German word, "frikon".
In language, "fuck" falls into many grammatical categories.


Fuck can be used as a verb both transitive (he fucked her) and intransitive (she was fucked by him).
a active verb (he really gives a fuck),
a passive verb (she really doesn't give a fuck),
an adverb (she is fucking interested in him) and
a noun (she is a fine fuck).
an adjective (she is fucking beautiful).
As you can see there is a whole lot of real versatility with "fuck". It pops up everywhere. Besides its sexual connotation, this lovely word can be used to describe many situations:

GREETING - How the fuck are you?
FRAUD - I got fucked by that crook;
DISMAY - Oh, fuck it!;
TROUBLE - I'm fucked now!;
CONFUSION - What the fuck?!;
AGGRESSION - "Fuck you!";
DISGUST - "Fuck me"
DESPAIR - Fucked again!;
PHILOSOPHY - "Who gives a fuck?"
INCOMPETENCE - "He's a real fuck-off";
DISPLEASURE - "What the fuck is going on here?"
NUMEROLOGY - "Sixty-fuckin'-nine";
LOST - "Where the fuck are we?"
DISBELIEF - "Unfuckingbelievable
RETALIATION - Up your fucking ass!"
REBELLION - Fuck it!;
DISPLEASURE - What the fuck's going on?;
SATISFACTION - fuck me again!
Also as:

DESCRIPTIVE ANATOMY - "He's a fuckin' asshole!"
TO TELL TIME - "It's six-fucking-thirty."
PREDICTION - "Well, I'll be fucked!"
A POLITICAL STATEMENT - "Fuck Washington"
INCESTUOUS - "Motherfucker"
A PUT DOWN - "Fuck off, buster!"
ALL ENCOMPASSING - "Fuck 'em all!"
GOVERNMENTAL AFFAIRS - "Fuck the IRS"
A POKER HAND- "A royal fuck"
TO START A RELATIONSHIP - "Let's fuck now!"
AS AN ACCEPTANCE - "Fuckin' eh!"
ENJOYMENT - "Fuckin' Wow!" "
A CLOSING - "Fuckingly yours".
MATERNAL - "Motherfucker"
POLITICAL - Fuck Clinton!!
Never forget the quotes of some famous people in our history and in the present:

Michelangelo: "You want me to paint what on the fucking ceiling"
George Custer: Where did all these Fucking indians come from?
Einstein: "Any fucker can understand that"
Mayor of Hiroshima: What the fuck was that?
Heidi Fleuss: Fuck these celebrities!
Mayor Richard Daley: Fuck the heat - - Chicago IL
John Wayne: "Fuck death and the lung cancer he rode in on."
Bill Clinton: What the fuck's this inhaling thing?
Oliver North: You're all fucking liars!
Sean PennFuck: Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck etc.
Eddie Murphy: Fuck you, Fuck you, and Fuck you. Who's next?
Jack Nicholas: Fuck this for a lark, 1995 British Open
And last but not least, the immortal words of the captain of the Titanic, who said "Full speed ahead and fuck the iceberg" and five minutes later said "Where is all this fucking water coming from?
The mind fairly boggles at the many creative uses of the many creative uses of the word. How can anyone be offended when you say "FUCK"? Use fuck in your daily speech proudly. Fuck adds prestige to any conversextion. Put this colorful four letter word to work for you. Today tell someone you know "fuck you" ... or "Let's fuck!"

This is a disclaimer. We know the origin of the word FUCK. When the puritans settled what is now Salem, they had this issue about pre-marital sex, they didn't approve of it. Not that it should matter to anybody except the two or three etc people are involved in in the privacy of their own home. Well these butt-inskies decided that sex should be a crime, and orgasms should be outlawed. Strange, how they thought they had the right to suppress one of God's greatest gifts while doing this in the name of God. Well If two people were caught in the act of having sex or even thinking about having sex they were brought to trial.

If they were found guilty the crime they were committed of was "For Under Carnal Knowledge". They were put in the stockades and their crime was also carved in a piece of wood and placed over their heads. This was before the printing press or even before Black and Decker and God forbid Craftsman power tools (I like Craftsmans tools, even my chain saw is Craftsman). So all carving in wood had to be done not only by hand, but with handmade tools. Since they couldn't run over to England or Germany very easily, they didn't have any airplanes yet either, they had to try to conserve their tools and time. Just imagine carving the whole thing out when they could be out looking for young lovers to lock up or witches to burn at the stake. So they invented the acronym, which is a word or letter abbreviations for longer phrases. So if you were caught fucking around, and found guilty, you had the word F.U.C.K placed over your head while you spent time in the stockades. That is where the word came from and that is how it is associated with screwing. So please don't E-mail me and tell me that Fuck is not a German word. I fucking already know that. This is a joke, it is something to be laughed and enjoyed, I hope. By the way, I also know that the first part is not really correct either. If you want to bitch about this letter, Fuck You and go to alt.bitch.about.anything and complain. :)
Click to expand...

LOL....That's some funny fucking shit!! :laughing:
 
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