Flirting for beginners.....

[Payaso]

Sorta had to notice this troll Jahnice, hope you don't mind me cleaning up your thread!!!

Hate it when that happens... hope you carry on, this is hella amusing!

 

[Jahnice]

glad someone enjoys a good chuckle around here









F.Y.I.-
This THREAD was in the 'WOMAN'S FORUM'!
PLEASE show some RESPECT for the ICMAG ladies!

 

[huligun]

A lot of guys compliment women and women have come to expect it. You tell a girl how great she is and her mind starts to wonder if you are trying to fast track the sex. Men will tell an absolute she troll she is hot to have sex with her, then try to get out before morning light.

 

[stoned-trout]

women flirt ,guys hit on ya...I think women use it to get a reaction ,making themselves feel better ......when I show interest I aint flirting , I am looking to get laid..plain and simple...yeehawww

 

[LEF]

Double post

(Sorry)

 

[LEF]

Maybe i am not persistent enough, but i always feel like i am not a good person or something when i flirt with girls, like there are better options out there and why should they settle for me.

It is true that women settle.

You are never their first choice, just someone she settled for.

← Flexibility Matrix.Many thanks and some linkage. →
Why we need to stop telling women to settle.
Posted on April 27, 2011 by Dalrock
Received wisdom in the manosphere is that women need to settle. I have to say I enjoy a good hamster carpet bombing as much as the next guy. But in the end the entertainment value isn’t worth the human cost. I’ve touched on this before, but after seeing the article Did You Marry the Wrong Guy? from Marie Claire (H/T GudEnuf) I wanted to revisit it.

The problem with telling women they need to settle isn’t that they won’t listen. The problem is that they will listen, or at least use this message as rationalization for wrecking an honest man’s life. The problem occurs because women don’t think like men. If you tell a man he has too high a sense of his own value in the dating/marriage marketplace, he is likely to be humbled by this. Actually no one needs to tell the typical guy this because they tend to figure it out based on which women are and aren’t attracted to them.

Too many women (especially the kind of women the message is aimed at) however hear this message and decide this means they should marry the well off guy they aren’t attracted to, ultimately doing him the favor of taking his kids and half his stuff when they figure out they don’t love him anymore. According to the Marie Claire article this is quite common:

According to recent research conducted by Jennifer Gauvain, a therapist in Denver, 30 percent of now-divorced women say they knew in their gut they were making a mistake as they walked down the aisle — and kept walking anyway. Only a handful backed out.

Being a women’s magazine, the article goes on to explain that the women themselves aren’t to blame for leaving a trail of wreckage in their wakes because society made them do it. The reality is they feared loosing the option to choose, and wanted the status that came with getting married as well as his money. He wasn’t likely to give up half of his stuff and pay for her to have children if she didn’t pretend to be in love with him in order to marry him:

Clark had dated a handsome businessman for four years before they got engaged, and although he didn’t make her heart race, she still loved him. “We were best friends, and I thought he’d make a great husband and father, even though I wasn’t ‘in love,'” she says. “I walked down the aisle thinking, What the hell? During my vows, I wasn’t making eye contact with my fiancé.”

Five years and two kids later, their sex life nonexistent, Clark wanted out. “I’d often wish he would cheat,” she says. Finally, her husband, sensing her unhappiness, ended it.

I see this woman as beneath more traditional gold diggers and prostitutes. She isn’t just harming him, but putting her children through great pain as well. Aside from stealing his wealth and children, she also stole his opportunity for great happiness. The truth is another woman would likely have found this same man quite attractive and lovable. She had no right to rob him of that because she lacked the capacity to reciprocate love but still wanted all of the benefits of marriage. Some might say that he should have learned game and all would have been well. Aside from the fact that this isn’t common knowledge in our culture, had he learned game he would have been able to marry a much better woman. She wanted a man of his appearance wealth and status with game, but none of them wanted her or she would have married one of them.

My guess is the root cause of women who are incapable of experiencing reciprocal love and attraction is a blend of the mismatch feminism has created between men and women, the impact of alpha chasing/promiscuity, and an overall entitlement complex. Whatever the cause of the issue, it does appear to be real for a significant percentage of women.

Making things worse, older women consistently advise younger women to pass up men they are in love with and attracted to with the assumption that another better man will be along shortly. We have seen this with Advice Goddess, Amy Dickinson, and the authors of Last one down the aisle wins. The reality is that experiencing mutual attraction isn’t a given for women, and should therefore not be abandoned lightly. This also is why the advice to women to postpone marriage and “just have fun” for a decade or more is so detrimental to them. Finding a man who they can reciprocate love and attraction with is difficult for many women, and only gets harder the older they become.

So stop telling women to settle. I beg you! The innocent (but clueless) beta you save may be someone you know.

I think this is the single biggest risk a man looking to marry faces. This is even bigger in my opinion than a woman’s sexual history, although the two are often connected.

 

[LEF]

F.Y.I.- THIS THREAD WAS IN THE 'WOMAN'S FORUM'!
please show some RESPECT-

So what does this mean ?

We need to respect women but not men ?
Sort of how violence against men is ok but against women its not ?

Women deserve special treatment ?
I thought you girls fought for equality ?

 

[Former Guest]

women flirt ,guys hit on ya...I think women use it to get a reaction ,making themselves feel better ......when I show interest I aint flirting , I am looking to get laid..plain and simple...yeehawww

what's so bad about feeling good about yourself after being flirtatious with someone? usually women do it if they're interested in you. nothings wrong with feeling attractive to a guy and that's why we tease so the ones who just wanna get laid are forced to work for it. usually they figure it out and take off. I feel like there are a lot of double standards.

 

[Babbabud]

Please lets remember the title of this thread. This is a not show up and complain about the state of the world ..... or go on some personal rant ...... this a thread about flirting ..... lets please stay on topic.

 

[Mrs.Babba]

This is exactly why I put this thread in tokers den....

 

[stoned-trout]

theres definitely a lot of double standards...and their is nothing wrong with flirting and feeling good...the definition of flirting doenst fit what I do...it all starts with one night...if it continues depends on several factors....yeehaw..I am a total slut whore.. I got no problem doing all the hot women I can get my hands on ...when I am single that is...loving the single life tho

 

[Former Guest]

maybe that's why guys don't find the "right" woman???

it all starts with one night...if it continues depends on several factors....yeehaw

theres some pretty good ones that only make you wait till date 3

 

[stoned-trout]

I didn't mean it like that.. I have had to wait a week before...yeehaw

 

[BlueBlazer]

Whenever I try to flirt with Mrs Blazer, she just asks me what I just broke.

 

[huligun]

So many people, so much diversity, so many countries, so many cultures, so many bad experiences. It is sad that a fun loving topic always has to end up ruined. Someone can start a topic that you think we would all agree with and someone comes in with a bad experience or just a diametrically opposed point of view. Sorry to the OP. I tried to contribute to the main spirit of the thread, although as it evolved I may have contributed to the points of evolution. I am sure you are a good person with a good heart and was just trying to connect with fellow stoners. We all know the rules are different between men and women, it sucks but that is what it is. The rules are different for the blonde bombshells and the ordinary women as well. Life is not a melting pot, but a big stir fry. A lot of unhappy people out there that for some reason or another has had a bad shake. Maybe every thread should be with a disclaimer of sorts. When I made my thread about getting married awhile back I had to ask those that have had bad divorces to kind of but out in the onset. It seems to have worked, as I have had mostly positive feedback. I cannot believe how many Men said I have a cute son. That is generally the domain of females.

 

[stoned-trout]

former guest ....yeehaw my bed is comfy and I got an extra pillow...

 

[DuskrayTroubador]

Not that I have much success, but I just try to be myself and relate to people.

Edit: Guess that's not really flirting, but I'm not too big of a flirt. I guess I'm more of a down-to-earth you're cool, I'm cool, in a world filled with people who just don't get it, we seem to get it,or at least be on the right track kind of person. It's not very good for pulling a lot of ass, but you'll certainly meet girls who are worth spending time with.

 

[armedoldhippy]

Whenever I try to flirt with Mrs Blazer, she just asks me what I just broke.

my wife is funny that way too. "you never do anything spontaneous!" so I go buy her flowers for no reason besides I thought they were pretty & reminded me of her. "what the fuck have you done now?" and so i spend the next week trying to convince her I haven't done anything... a friend of mine just went through a divorce after 25 years of marriage. we were sitting around bullshitting about the "good ol' days" and he looked at me and said "if I had strangled the bitch the day we got married, I would be out of jail by now..."

 

[Shcrews]

LEF good post that was an interesting article. not sure who is to blame in that situation

 

[Polishdankchron]

For the older couples, clean the house for her or hire a college student, find a memento from long ago and write her a card telling her that you remembered this and why, or take her down memory lane to where you first met. Remembering is sexy

Good luck guys!

Wife: "Who the fuck is this?!" (walks in on skimpy dressed housecleaner)
Husband: It's Cindy!
Wife: ...
Husband: "I hired her to clean our house honey!"
Wife: mmmhm
Husband: "but she really needs the money for college"

My girl would be pissed if I hired annnyone to clean our shit up hehe