^ Haha what city was that in SF? That sounds like standard operating procedure in San Francisco, just a simple "GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE" is their normal way to handle things.
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Arrest Stories & Close Calls
- Thread starter Crazy Composer
- Start date
Octothorp
Member
Sitting having a joint around the back of the cinema pre film with a couple of friends. Cool looking guy comes over and starts chatting to us. We do the polite thing and offer hime some tokes. 
But it turns out he was a plain clothes policeman.
Little trip to the station and a ticket later....... and catch the film
But it turns out he was a plain clothes policeman.
Little trip to the station and a ticket later.......
and catch the film
Octothorp
Member
There is this pizza place that makes insane sized pizzas that are big enough to feed 8 hungry stoners. So we place in an order after a couple hours baking and head to my friends garage to start smoking.
Eight of us smoking away in the garage bongs, joints and water buckets(gravity bong). When all of a sudden there is a really loud BANG BANG BANG on the garage door.
We all freeze in terror.
The door slowly starts to open.......but standing in the doorway was a little itallian man coming to check that the pizza order wasnt a prank as the person had been laughing on the phone. He just laughed and said he would be back in 20 minutes with the pizza.
But for a couple of milliseconds we all thought we were busted.
Eight of us smoking away in the garage bongs, joints and water buckets(gravity bong). When all of a sudden there is a really loud BANG BANG BANG on the garage door.
We all freeze in terror.
The door slowly starts to open.......but standing in the doorway was a little itallian man coming to check that the pizza order wasnt a prank as the person had been laughing on the phone. He just laughed and said he would be back in 20 minutes with the pizza.
But for a couple of milliseconds we all thought we were busted.
Philosophy
New member
back in my army days (mandatory service in the black berets), we used to smoke alot of herb. In the M60/Leopard tanks, during guard duty, in the offices of the division, in the toilets, with the MP's in their jeeps, etc.
During a 5-day military exervice, we drove deep in the forest (somewhere in the mediteranean lets say..). After 7-8 hrs of really slow-driving (we had army tanks being carried on massive trucks), we were all tired and lookin fwd to sit down, set up the tents of the captains, eat and go to sleep.
Sun was almost down and i m sitting in the passenger seat of an army truck, dazed, lookin out the window, when i notice these huge 8-9ft plants on the side of the road that look SO MUCH like marijuana. Then i think to myself "nahhh it cant be marijuana, these plants are freakin everywhere.. If it was maryjane, i m sure the locals (who lived in a nearby little village) would have noticed all these plants by now". Little i knew that the locals were prolly profiting from these wild (or not so...wild) growing ganja plants.
We finally arrived to the camping spot (right next to a river), we set up the tents, ate a crappy army dinner and then gathered togethed with a few buddies for a toke before we went to sleep. Then all of sudden one of our stoner buddies goes "theres fuckin marijuana everywhere!!" and shows us a few fresh cut buds. It was pot allright. Needed a good 3 weeks to finish, but it was a nice sativa.
It was too dark (and too dodgy) to go hunting for buds at that point, so next morning after packing all the shit up again and loading it on the trucks, we kept our eyes open for plants. Next day, back on the convoy, here i am again on the passenger seat of the truck and right behind us we have a jeep with one of the strict captains of our division. We were passing tens if not hundreds of plants on the way, but having him right behind us i couldnt do anything (if i reached out of the window i could easily grab some huge buds). But the orders were strict. "If we see anyone cutting marijuana, he gets 40 days prison" and i had enough prison days up until that point after a year and a half in the army...
To make a long story short, for the next 20 mins we were passing 9ft sativas with buds up to one meter in length (2-3 buds per plant). I m not exaggerating, the buds were big.
at one point i was like fuck it...i m cutting a bud. Basically i didnt give a damn if the captain was right behind us. He knew i was a toker and i had served enough jail time for being one.
So i see a nice huge bud coming up the road and i pull myself almost half out the truck window. I grab the 3-ft bud and start pulling, trying to break it (dont forget the truck is moving now and the captain is right behind us with his jeep). But that thing wouldnt break. I was determined not to let go when all of sudden **SNAP!!!**
I get myself inside the truck again and the cabin reeks like fresh skunk. This bud was easy 2-3 ounces so i break it in pieces and put it in various ammunition pockets of my uniform. It was so funny to see, a soldier with buds popping out of all his pockets. And the smell....
Basically i couldnt give a damn about the driver either, who was a narc.
unfortunatly i didnt get a chance to dry the bud properly in the following days and it rotted.
A few days later, we took the general's jeep and did some donuts in the parking lot after smoking some J's with a coupla of MP's who were "ok" (not narcs). Then we skin up and climbed on a 50ft water tower (right next to the parking lot) and watched soldiers go by. Then all of sudden we hear the generals voice calling the name of his driver. He was looking for him to drive him somewhere, but the guy was on top of the water tower having a J with us. Panic!
The general is right underneath us in the parking lot, starting to get pissed off and we cant hold our laughs seeing him from above. This went on for 10mins and then he started to walk away. So this guy (the driver) quickly goes down the ladder and pops right in front of him (totally stoned) going "did you call me sir?". And the guy was like "where the fuck were you?? I ve been here for 10mins!!! Bring the jeep now!!!!!!!!!!"
Needless to say we were watching this from up the water tower, laughing our ass off
During a 5-day military exervice, we drove deep in the forest (somewhere in the mediteranean lets say..). After 7-8 hrs of really slow-driving (we had army tanks being carried on massive trucks), we were all tired and lookin fwd to sit down, set up the tents of the captains, eat and go to sleep.
Sun was almost down and i m sitting in the passenger seat of an army truck, dazed, lookin out the window, when i notice these huge 8-9ft plants on the side of the road that look SO MUCH like marijuana. Then i think to myself "nahhh it cant be marijuana, these plants are freakin everywhere.. If it was maryjane, i m sure the locals (who lived in a nearby little village) would have noticed all these plants by now". Little i knew that the locals were prolly profiting from these wild (or not so...wild) growing ganja plants.
We finally arrived to the camping spot (right next to a river), we set up the tents, ate a crappy army dinner and then gathered togethed with a few buddies for a toke before we went to sleep. Then all of sudden one of our stoner buddies goes "theres fuckin marijuana everywhere!!" and shows us a few fresh cut buds. It was pot allright. Needed a good 3 weeks to finish, but it was a nice sativa.
It was too dark (and too dodgy) to go hunting for buds at that point, so next morning after packing all the shit up again and loading it on the trucks, we kept our eyes open for plants. Next day, back on the convoy, here i am again on the passenger seat of the truck and right behind us we have a jeep with one of the strict captains of our division. We were passing tens if not hundreds of plants on the way, but having him right behind us i couldnt do anything (if i reached out of the window i could easily grab some huge buds). But the orders were strict. "If we see anyone cutting marijuana, he gets 40 days prison" and i had enough prison days up until that point after a year and a half in the army...
To make a long story short, for the next 20 mins we were passing 9ft sativas with buds up to one meter in length (2-3 buds per plant). I m not exaggerating, the buds were big.
at one point i was like fuck it...i m cutting a bud. Basically i didnt give a damn if the captain was right behind us. He knew i was a toker and i had served enough jail time for being one.
So i see a nice huge bud coming up the road and i pull myself almost half out the truck window. I grab the 3-ft bud and start pulling, trying to break it (dont forget the truck is moving now and the captain is right behind us with his jeep). But that thing wouldnt break. I was determined not to let go when all of sudden **SNAP!!!**
I get myself inside the truck again and the cabin reeks like fresh skunk. This bud was easy 2-3 ounces so i break it in pieces and put it in various ammunition pockets of my uniform. It was so funny to see, a soldier with buds popping out of all his pockets. And the smell....
Basically i couldnt give a damn about the driver either, who was a narc.
unfortunatly i didnt get a chance to dry the bud properly in the following days and it rotted.
A few days later, we took the general's jeep and did some donuts in the parking lot after smoking some J's with a coupla of MP's who were "ok" (not narcs). Then we skin up and climbed on a 50ft water tower (right next to the parking lot) and watched soldiers go by. Then all of sudden we hear the generals voice calling the name of his driver. He was looking for him to drive him somewhere, but the guy was on top of the water tower having a J with us. Panic!
The general is right underneath us in the parking lot, starting to get pissed off and we cant hold our laughs seeing him from above. This went on for 10mins and then he started to walk away. So this guy (the driver) quickly goes down the ladder and pops right in front of him (totally stoned) going "did you call me sir?". And the guy was like "where the fuck were you?? I ve been here for 10mins!!! Bring the jeep now!!!!!!!!!!"
Needless to say we were watching this from up the water tower, laughing our ass off
^hahaha damn what country is that? my boys who joined the marine corps said marijuana smoking is strictly prohibited. one of my friends also got dishonerably discharged for cocaine use.
man hot boxing a tank and going out on training missions sounds like fun! sometimes when im high i feel very "military" meaning i love to run around in nature pretending im sort of paramilitary guerilla. Last year me and my cousin ambushed a security gaurd with a pinecone assault after a huge blunt! He was gaurding an abandoned hospital in the middle of the woods that we used to always break into and paint art inside.
man hot boxing a tank and going out on training missions sounds like fun! sometimes when im high i feel very "military" meaning i love to run around in nature pretending im sort of paramilitary guerilla. Last year me and my cousin ambushed a security gaurd with a pinecone assault after a huge blunt! He was gaurding an abandoned hospital in the middle of the woods that we used to always break into and paint art inside.
Beowulfagate
Member
To date I have talked my way out of 3 DWI's, once with a NYS trooper! King Kong ain't got shit on me
CaptainStoner
Member
Last week..
Got picked up by a mate, we were all going to a party.. i've got quite some bud on me for said party, and a backpack full of booze.
On the way, we pick up another mate who is a dealer. roar off.... minutes later, blue lights, sirens.. pulled over.. we're all shitting ourselves because we've all got bud and a couple of us had just skinned up.. and then there's the dealer in the front with about fifty 10 bags in his trousers plus god knows what else.. the cops had seen us pick him up.
so the cop is talking to my mate whose car it was, searching him and getting the dealer dude to turn out his pockets.. never found anything
then he comes up to me and the other dude who i don't know who was in the back.. same routine on him, what were you doing in the car, turn out your pockets, etc
comes to me:
PIG: What were you doing in that car?
me: going to a party with my friends, look, got a bit of booze in my bag *shows him then puts bag back on my back*
PIG: would you mind turning out your pockets sir?
me: certainly officer.. -- i do that, nothing in there anyway
PIG: *asks for my name, address etc*
me: now why would you want that? i've done nothing wrong, no need for you to waste your time (i didnt want my name in connection with the dealer's on the pig database)
PIG: GIVE ME YOUR NAME AND ADDRESS NOW
me: actually, now i think about it, f*ck you fatty!
/me runs off, with the pig's female partner in close pursuit.. didn't take long to lose her
turns out my mates said that they'd given me a lift on the ask of someone else, they said they didn't know my name except that it was mike (which it ain't) and after a while of angry shouting, the pig let them go too when the other pig got back from chasing me.. i got to the party before they did
Got picked up by a mate, we were all going to a party.. i've got quite some bud on me for said party, and a backpack full of booze.
On the way, we pick up another mate who is a dealer. roar off.... minutes later, blue lights, sirens.. pulled over.. we're all shitting ourselves because we've all got bud and a couple of us had just skinned up.. and then there's the dealer in the front with about fifty 10 bags in his trousers plus god knows what else.. the cops had seen us pick him up.
so the cop is talking to my mate whose car it was, searching him and getting the dealer dude to turn out his pockets.. never found anything
then he comes up to me and the other dude who i don't know who was in the back.. same routine on him, what were you doing in the car, turn out your pockets, etc
comes to me:
PIG: What were you doing in that car?
me: going to a party with my friends, look, got a bit of booze in my bag *shows him then puts bag back on my back*
PIG: would you mind turning out your pockets sir?
me: certainly officer.. -- i do that, nothing in there anyway
PIG: *asks for my name, address etc*
me: now why would you want that? i've done nothing wrong, no need for you to waste your time (i didnt want my name in connection with the dealer's on the pig database)
PIG: GIVE ME YOUR NAME AND ADDRESS NOW
me: actually, now i think about it, f*ck you fatty!
/me runs off, with the pig's female partner in close pursuit.. didn't take long to lose her
turns out my mates said that they'd given me a lift on the ask of someone else, they said they didn't know my name except that it was mike (which it ain't) and after a while of angry shouting, the pig let them go too when the other pig got back from chasing me.. i got to the party before they did
K
KMK0420
So i figured i'd share this story. At this time i talk about (which was around nov of either 07 or 08) i met a girl, which almost cost me my freedom possibly.
....every once in awhile, if a hot girl hits me up on myspace...i'll follow through and hang out with her. hey, i'm not complaining..most of the time. anyway...met this girl at a local restaurant where she worked a few miles away from me. one thing led to another, and yeah we both ended up at my house in a few, screwing our brains out. the next day, dropping her off at the restaurant we did it in the parking lot. we had viewers, it was crazy. bad decision(s) on my part for multiple reasons obviously, but hey shit happens. things go on for a few days...and she decides to tell me she has 2 kids (her age: 22)...immediate turn off for me. i find out a few more things like her dad smokes weed, so i would always be over there with a few g's or an oz or two on me with scales to help them weigh out shit whenever needed. we end up messing around one or two more times (well, fucking not messing) and after a day or so she turned extremely shady, and turned out to be nothing more than a cheap date really. didnt really bother me, stopped talking to her and moved on.
anyway my girl A hits me up one day and says hey did you see the news? and i'm like no, wtf are you talking about? so she sends me this (Edited to blurr location)
(my area) Pa. -- A roundup in (my area) early Tuesday morning netted 15 arrests for various violations. (my area) police narcotics and vice detectives, along with the U.S. Marshal's service, conducted the sweep. Investigators said they made 15 arrests for various offenses ranging from prostitution and felony narcotics to aggravated assault. Investigators also made four additional arrests when they discovered large marijuana plants growing in the yard of a (my area) residence. In the roundup, investigators seized evidence, including narcotics, large marijuana plants, scales, paraphernalia and cash.The names of the suspects and charges against them have not been released.
they had a video, which has since been removed, of the people they arrested. there was only a few people arrested from the area mentioned above (my area), and they lived at the same house. in (my area), which is exactly where the aforementioned girl lives...thought nothing of it until i saw her face handcuffed on all local news stations!
so, the girl i JUST, as of the day before, stopped banging daily...had weed growing at her house, and i was there literally the day before the bust (and i would have been busted with weed, scales, pipes and like 1 or 2 pills..AT a grow house.)
....every once in awhile, if a hot girl hits me up on myspace...i'll follow through and hang out with her. hey, i'm not complaining..most of the time. anyway...met this girl at a local restaurant where she worked a few miles away from me. one thing led to another, and yeah we both ended up at my house in a few, screwing our brains out. the next day, dropping her off at the restaurant we did it in the parking lot. we had viewers, it was crazy. bad decision(s) on my part for multiple reasons obviously, but hey shit happens. things go on for a few days...and she decides to tell me she has 2 kids (her age: 22)...immediate turn off for me. i find out a few more things like her dad smokes weed, so i would always be over there with a few g's or an oz or two on me with scales to help them weigh out shit whenever needed. we end up messing around one or two more times (well, fucking not messing) and after a day or so she turned extremely shady, and turned out to be nothing more than a cheap date really. didnt really bother me, stopped talking to her and moved on.
anyway my girl A hits me up one day and says hey did you see the news? and i'm like no, wtf are you talking about? so she sends me this (Edited to blurr location)
(my area) Pa. -- A roundup in (my area) early Tuesday morning netted 15 arrests for various violations. (my area) police narcotics and vice detectives, along with the U.S. Marshal's service, conducted the sweep. Investigators said they made 15 arrests for various offenses ranging from prostitution and felony narcotics to aggravated assault. Investigators also made four additional arrests when they discovered large marijuana plants growing in the yard of a (my area) residence. In the roundup, investigators seized evidence, including narcotics, large marijuana plants, scales, paraphernalia and cash.The names of the suspects and charges against them have not been released.
they had a video, which has since been removed, of the people they arrested. there was only a few people arrested from the area mentioned above (my area), and they lived at the same house. in (my area), which is exactly where the aforementioned girl lives...thought nothing of it until i saw her face handcuffed on all local news stations!
so, the girl i JUST, as of the day before, stopped banging daily...had weed growing at her house, and i was there literally the day before the bust (and i would have been busted with weed, scales, pipes and like 1 or 2 pills..AT a grow house.)
same here. one of them was a federal park police guy who also managed to catch me for vandalism. i was sooo sure i would be sleeping in jail that night, until he told me to go home. i also wiggled my way out of another DUI by only blowing a .03 even though i was a minor, and i got out of another DUI last month, i just held my breath shut and prayed he didnt smell the liquor, cop wrote me a ticket for speeding and told me to bounce.
buuuut i was caught once for DUI, that was over 3 years ago.
im trying to keep it cool now.
j6p
Member
Back during my misspent youth I was pulled over after leaving a new year's eve party, and hauled down to the station. Because it was late new year's eve, there were so many people waiting to take the test that when my turn finally came, I blew it and passed. Had to pay to get my car out of the pound, however.
Beowulfagate
Member
Close call during high school: our school was next to a mall (torn down now) and had a golf course out back. A friend and I were smoking a jay before a football game and got so blazed we didn't bother to put it out before walking through teachers' parking lot. Coming around a corner when I realized their was a lit doob in my hand so I ducked behind a dumpster to put it out and pocket the roach. As soon as I stood up we got hit with a spot light, one of the cars in the parking lot just happened to be an unmarked patrol car and LEO figured I was hiding my stash until after the game. He gets down on his hands and knees and looks around under the dumpster for at least 5 minutes, when he finally gives up he shines his light in my face and asks me what I stashed back there. Without any hesitation I say "I saw something shiny back there and thought it might be a lost wrist watch or some jewelry" as soon as he left we finished off the roach.
Well, this happend to some friends of mine just recently.... after day 1 of harvesting, my friends leave to go home, smelling like they had been trimming pot all day. They had about an hour drive, especially since they like to take the back roads and chill and smoke after a long days work, right? They had just bought a brand new car earlier that week, and didn't realize that only the parking lights were on. As the sun was going down and just starting to get dark, they see the lights comming up behind them. My friend, sitting in the driver's seat, pulles over to greet the cop, only thinking about how he totaly wreaks of pot and totaly forgets that his bowl is sitting in his lap! The cop begins to talk about how, "these new cars these days have funky lights and he's caught himself driving with only the parking lights on.... blah blah blah... Here, let me help you out with this..." Sticks his upper body into the window to turn on the head lights for him, my friend now realizes the bowl in his lap and cant say a word, just freaking inside! Officer turns on the head lights, tells them to have a great night, and goes back to his car. Yikes!
RaptorJesus
Member
wow. thats insane. sounds like a stoner cop to me
bkind
Member
Me and my ex-girlfriend were on the way to tahoe passing through nevada. We pull up to a gas station and I notice an empty baggy (other than some crumbs and kif) in my door so I pocket it to throw away. Back on the road she's driving going 90+ in a 75 mph. We get pulled over and I find that empty baggy in my pocket I meant to throw away so I stuff it in the passenger door compartment . In the back of the Forrester there are compartments in the floor for the spare and some smaller compartments for storage, that is where I have about 5-7 grams of curing Juicy Fruit, about a gram of bubble hash from it, and a small pipe stashed. The cop takes our info and then sits in his car for about 15 to 30 mins until a K9 unit rolls up and they talk for a few minutes. The first cop comes back to my car and being aware of Nevadas fucked up laws says exactly what I don't want to hear. "Could you two please step out of the vehicle?" Once outside the car I am informed they are looking for drugs and I am told the outside of my vehicle is open air space and legal to run the dog around. I am asked if there are any illegal drugs in the car, I answer no. The dog obviously signals my passenger door. Then I am asked if there is any reason the dog would signal for narcotics in the car? I remember the empty baggy and tell them that's probably why and where it is. The cop opens my door and lets the dog find the bag then run around the inside of my car. Then they say they're going to search the rest of my car, now I get a little worried. I see one of them take the bags out covering the in-floor compartments and start looking through our bags. Thank God he quickly put them back, covering the compartment holding my stash. By now I know I've pulled a quick one on these guys and soon to be released. One of the cops tells me the empty bag qualifies for a misdemeanor drug offense in Nevada and it's going to cost $2200.
He asks if I have $2200, I say no. And then they laugh and say they'd have to be complete assholes to do that to me but if I had closer to an ounce I'd be going to jail! Another commented they were looking for closer to 100lbs but the small stuff comes along with it. Funny thing was during this 45min to 1hr process my ex left my key turned to acc. and they had to jump my car before I can leave. Moral of the story...don't let you girl drive 100mph in a no tolerance state if you're holding, duh.
He asks if I have $2200, I say no. And then they laugh and say they'd have to be complete assholes to do that to me but if I had closer to an ounce I'd be going to jail! Another commented they were looking for closer to 100lbs but the small stuff comes along with it. Funny thing was during this 45min to 1hr process my ex left my key turned to acc. and they had to jump my car before I can leave. Moral of the story...don't let you girl drive 100mph in a no tolerance state if you're holding, duh.
O
ocean99
I was coming home from my weed guys house on my bike (no helmet = pulled over in my town) with a quad in my pocket and like 3 xanax bars. I cross the main street in my town and see a cop and my heart starts racing like a motherfucker. I immediately turn down this alley behind Vons, chomp the 3 z-bars and throw the weed behind a dumpster. Cops are right behind me so I stop, get searched with nada, and talk my way into getting back on my bike with a warning. They told me to walk the bike for the remaining 4 blocks to my house.... Once I'm under cover of darkness I recover my dank and skedaddle on home for a REALLY GOOD NIGHTS/DAYS SLEEP 
Ipsissimus
Member
(no helmet = pulled over in my town)
and searched? damn dude! close one. I guess you agreed to be searched
and searched? damn dude! close one. I guess you agreed to be searched
About 4 years ago me and some friends that i had meet travelling was staying just out side Thong Sala, which is a small town on Koh Phangan in Thailand. It was amazing we were staying in little huts on the beach perfect blue green sea and white beaches which we had mostly our selves.
We had been there about 2 months, smoke was easy to come by we were never out for more than a few hours at a time).
Anyway, Me and G one of my mates were sitting out front of his hunt one afternoon drinking Chang and smoking this bong that we had fashioned out of what i think was a papaya leaf and a water bottle. We are toking away when i notice we have some new neighbours a Thai guy and what i assume was his wife. As soon as i look over he gets up walks over and says hello we say hi, there's a short pause and he realises we cant speak Thai then he points at the bong so i think he wants a smoke and offer him a bowl he declines making a rolling motion with his hands, a few more hand gestures back and forth, i roll him a J and pass it to him he takes it pauses for a moment couches down next to us and says, in English
guy "I'm a police officer"
My hart dropped i didn't know what to do i wasn't sure if i was in trouble or what
me "What?"
guy "I'm a police officer, here's my badge"
shows me some kinda official looking badge with an id card all in Thai but me me and G just looked at each other stone faced thought we were off to the Hilton but the guy just Lahghs and says,
guy "Just kidding"
He takes the J back to his place and lights it up, Me and G still not quite sure if it really happen proceed to get annihilated.
The Thai couple only stayed that one night i never did get to find out if he was really a police officer or if he was just winding me up lol
We had been there about 2 months, smoke was easy to come by we were never out for more than a few hours at a time
). Anyway, Me and G one of my mates were sitting out front of his hunt one afternoon drinking Chang and smoking this bong that we had fashioned out of what i think was a papaya leaf and a water bottle. We are toking away when i notice we have some new neighbours a Thai guy and what i assume was his wife. As soon as i look over he gets up walks over and says hello we say hi, there's a short pause and he realises we cant speak Thai then he points at the bong so i think he wants a smoke and offer him a bowl he declines making a rolling motion with his hands, a few more hand gestures back and forth, i roll him a J and pass it to him he takes it pauses for a moment couches down next to us and says, in English
guy "I'm a police officer"
My hart dropped i didn't know what to do i wasn't sure if i was in trouble or what
me "What?"
guy "I'm a police officer, here's my badge"
shows me some kinda official looking badge with an id card all in Thai but me me and G just looked at each other stone faced thought we were off to the Hilton but the guy just Lahghs and says,
guy "Just kidding"
He takes the J back to his place and lights it up, Me and G still not quite sure if it really happen proceed to get annihilated.
The Thai couple only stayed that one night i never did get to find out if he was really a police officer or if he was just winding me up lol
M
masterKahn
^^ Thai cops smoke too I'm sure. That joint was his bribe, got off cheap if you ask me
