W
wegobigupnorth
I too had serious addiction problems but not with booze, with opiates and benzos (pills like Valium and Xanax) and every time I would go through the hell of withdrawal/detox I would think I was to smart to ever become addicted again but I could still use once in a while. you ever heard of a recreation Oxycontin and heroin user? me either, but thats what the "sickness" of addiction does to your brain. You justify everything so you can use.
It is so overwhelming when first trying to kick the habit to think you can never use again, I thought it would be impossible. Now, I can't believe how fucking stupid I was for going through the worst sickness you can imagine (withdrawal) every time I ran out of dope which happened freuently, for throwing my whole life away just to get high which of course I was not even getting high I was just trying to keep well and I feel like a lot of alcoholics do not even enjoy getting drunk anymore but they feel they HAVE to drink because if they don't and that anxiety and all the other mental stress, not to mention the hellish physical WD that heavy drinkers get, it is so overwhelming espically when you know all it takes is a drink or a hit to take the pain away but trust me, it gets better QUICK.
Sounds like your doing great. Soon your gonna be shocked that you wasted all that time drinking but don't dwell on it, just move forward! Much love brother.
It is so overwhelming when first trying to kick the habit to think you can never use again, I thought it would be impossible. Now, I can't believe how fucking stupid I was for going through the worst sickness you can imagine (withdrawal) every time I ran out of dope which happened freuently, for throwing my whole life away just to get high which of course I was not even getting high I was just trying to keep well and I feel like a lot of alcoholics do not even enjoy getting drunk anymore but they feel they HAVE to drink because if they don't and that anxiety and all the other mental stress, not to mention the hellish physical WD that heavy drinkers get, it is so overwhelming espically when you know all it takes is a drink or a hit to take the pain away but trust me, it gets better QUICK.
Sounds like your doing great. Soon your gonna be shocked that you wasted all that time drinking but don't dwell on it, just move forward! Much love brother.
