You know you live in the country if......

[GuerrillaRed]

You walk out of your house at around 2 AM and feel eyes on you. It takes you a few moments of scanning the darkness to realize there's a large animal just randomly hanging out in your yard staring at you.

You're forced to have a poopy internet connection because no one is running fiber connections in the woods.

It's strange if one of your neighbors isn't growing weed.

The most common form of political advertisement you see is old pickup trucks flying rebel or huge American flags or graffiti spray painted on them by the truck's owner.

 

[kaochiu]

...if you can see your own shadow

 

[Stoner4Life]

there's a patriot behind every flag.......

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[Stoner4Life]

You know you live in the country if.......

You know you live in the country if.......



your fun on Saturdays is taking bets on which
city slicker's gonna be the first stay on their steed.

 

[Stoner4Life]

You know you live in the country if.......

You know you live in the country if.......


screwing with the old lady is loads of fun.

sneaky sneaky

 

[armedoldhippy]

screwing with the old lady is loads of fun.
sneaky sneaky

cold, very cold. funny as hell, though...

 

[brown_thumb]

screwing with the old lady is loads of fun.


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sneaky sneaky

She's gonna get you back and it won't be fun. Women can be ruthless when it comes to payback.

 

[noyd666]

when driving down the dirt road you see a side of beef hanging in the front veranda.

 

[Stoner4Life]

there's a patriot behind every flag.......


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lmfmfao, maybe the same patriot as above

 

[noyd666]

if your got this girl in yer paddock

 

[MicroRoy]

 

[Stoner4Life]

You know you live in the country if.......

You know you live in the country if.......



you don't do this to your $15,000 toys.......

city folk, sheeeeeeesh!

 

[MicroRoy]

 

[Stoner4Life]

You know you live in the country if.......

You know you live in the country if.......


you & your favorite ride both get the joke

awesome alarm kitty

 

[Stoner4Life]

You know you live in the country if.......

You know you live in the country if.......

your sweetie knows how to handle that old single action hog leg.

All my pics are down, photobucket is in maintenance right now.

 

[mowood3479]

Everyone thinks having a few hens is alrite to get fresh eggs in the morning and have a bucolic breakfast every day. But sometimes reality is not what you expect. I've got those hens, but all their eggs i give them away cos i don't like eggs. Anyway, there are more people here who does, only it's me who cares for the chickens.
Now, there's Tejero too, a cock that cock-a-dooddles a lot, anytime, several times, as soon as anyones approaches the enclosure, he starts flapping his wings, sharpens the beak against the ground and then attacks.
In order to prevent these attacks, i either hit him with the plastic bucket or throw a cloth on top of him. As i get there several times a day, you can imagine the daily fight. The fuckin idiot doesn't understand that i'm just there to feed him, and that i could kill him so easily with a neck twist. I respect him cos he's so brave defending the hens, but still he's a fuckin idiot.
And this is getting worse and worse, for he's a traitor too. Sometimes he'll not attack straight away, but wait until i turn my back to him. But i'm too fast for the bastard and hit him with the bucket just before he reaches me. It only gets him angrier, i only hit him harder or i put the bucket over his head.
Then, when i leave he cockadooddles like he won. That last bit gets on my nerves, probably he's telling the hens that i left because he won the fight or something, hens are stupid and believe this fuckin bullshitter pimp, cos they still worship him.
I think a proper farmer would just kill the fucker, make soup stock and put a calmer one instead, but i believe in karma and karma coud hit back. I won't put a photo yet because oversensible people might get biased. So, would you...
A.- Offer him a quick departure from this world
B.- Carry on with the daily charade
C.- Release him into the wild

I shotgun the roosters. They're useless to me and they're mean.

 

[brown_thumb]

Roosters are annoyingly loud sons-o-bitches.

 

[noyd666]

if nanna is sitting on the porch waiting for randy old grand dad to show up in his olds 88.

 

[kaochiu]

I shotgun the roosters. They're useless to me and they're mean.

They're useless to me too, but then again, release it with the hens and presto! more roast chickens.

Roosters are annoyingly loud sons-o-bitches.

Reading between lines.. are you subtly suggesting that you don't like roosters? They got fillings too! For example, chicken Kiev has a good fllling.

Noyd: This one comes from a neighbour i had a couple of years ago. It's an ox called Pezuñas (hoofs). It gave 1300 kg of meat, and alive he weighed 2.2t. The T-bones where matured for 45 days at 5ºC and sold at 120€ (140$) a kg. I think he made the guinness, but not sure.

 

[al70]

In the distant sky ye can see the smog dome from the city.