Trailer Park Boys own Whiskey

[Smokerman]

Coming to Ontario soon.









If you were riding stagecoach through the Old West in the late 1800’s, there was a feared group of bandits that you did not want to meet.

…
Ruthless in their robbing and thieving, these bandits weren’t after your gold or your jewels, they were only interested in acquiring one thing – your liquor.

Word spread quickly about ‘THE LIQUORMEN.’

In recognition, the Trailer Park Boys, experts on great spirits, created Liquormen’s Ol’ Dirty Canadian Whisky.
This is their story, and this is their whisky.​

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[Smokerman]

You know what they say: Candy’s dandy. And liquor’s quicker. But a combination of pot, hash and whisky — well, it’s fast on its way to an LCBO near you.
Liquormen’s Ol’ Dirty Canadian Whisky, which is promoted by the Trailer Park Boys, suggests you should mix its booze with a “six-paper joint.”
It also suggests it’s the right booze to drink early in the morning.
“Let’s face it, some days you’re going to wake up and start drinking before 10 a.m.,” it says, under its recipe section of the website.
The LCBO is set to launch the brand on Thursday. How’s that for “social responsibility” when it comes to our state-run liquor store?
OK, understand this is a spoof. I know the Trailer Park Boys’ trademark is booze, drugs and profanity.
But the LCBO is a government agency dedicated to social responsibility. They’ve been entrusted with the job of selling booze to us because, apparently, we need people to tell us how to do this in a sensible fashion.
Stocking a product that tells people to liquor up before noon and what goes best with six-paper spliff is really not a role we want from the government.
Asked about the product Monday, Premier Kathleen Wynne said she hadn’t heard about it.
“None of that sounds particularly savoury to me — and dangerous,” she told reporters, adding she’ll “look into it.”
A spokesman for the LCBO said the offensive materials are not LCBO advertising, but were created by the manufacturer.
“Each manufacturer is independently subject to AGCO (Alcohol and Gaming Commission of Ontario) advertising guidelines for beverage alcohol.
“LCBO follows AGCO and CRTC advertising guidelines in all of its own advertising and reviews all labels of products sold on its shelves for compliance with those guidelines as well as federal labelling rules,” said Christine Bujold.
“This includes screening for possibly offensive or misleading wording and graphics, before products are approved for sale in LCBO stores.”
She said social responsibility messaging is integrated into all advertising, publications and online content created by LCBO.
The Liquorman’s Ol’ Dirty Canadian Whisky, which is made by Dartmouth Spirits in Nova Scotia, is promoted by the Trailer Park Boys and will be available at LCBO stores for purchase later this week.
Deputy Premier Deb Matthews insists the government takes social responsibility seriously.
“The paramount issue is social responsibility. When the LCBO has the benefit of being the only liquor seller in the province, then that also means that there’s a big social responsibility component to it,” she told reporters.
Then again, the federal Liberal government is planning to legalize marijuana. So if it’s socially responsible to do that, and if booze is legal, what’s the problem with combining the two, I asked Matthews.
Or is is the federal government being socially irresponsible to legalize pot?
“It’s the socially responsible thing to legalize marijuana. I think it’s the right thing to do and we’re waiting for the federal government to give guidelines on exactly how that’s to be done,” she said.
Well, here’s a solution. Perhaps we should put Trailer Park Boys in charge of legalizing pot.
The LCBO is the largest purchaser of beverage alcohol in the world. Perhaps in future they should do a little more due diligence on what they’re stocking before they put it on the shelves.
•••
Here’s some of the recipes on the Liquorman’s Ol’ Dirty Canadian Whisky website:
ZESTY MORDANT
Ingredients:
Liquormen’s
Six papers
An entire day to kill
Roll up a six paper joint, grab a bag of chips, and pour yourself a straight glass of Liquormen’s. Today you’re getting f----d up and there’s not a goddamn thing Lahey can do about it.
THE SUNNYVALE
Ingredients:
Liquormen’s
Hash
Hockey
Pull out your hot knives, prepare your throat, and wash it back with a chilled glass of Liquormen’s. Grab a friend and challenge him to a game of hash hockey.
PROPANE PROPANE
Ingredients:

 

[sadpanda]

aged 3 years though, that doesnt sound like a typical TPB get rich scheme, nomesayinimsayin?

 

[VonBudí]

tight as piss

 

[who dat is]

No Swish?

https://youtu.be/lSJ5fOnkkCk

 

[blastfrompast]

sadly I know people who have "swish" brewing in their basement...lol

Joys of having a Crown Royal plant close by LOL...

 

[VERMONSTAH]

They choulda just called it julians juice, anything to make a buck.

 

[sadpanda]

Ricky clearly hasn't heard of jenkem yet, or he'd be all over that

 

[shithawk420]

I don't think even Ricky would fuck with jenkem.is the whiskey going to be available in the US?of all people I should know but I dont

 

[Smokerman]

I don't think even Ricky would fuck with jenkem.is the whiskey going to be available in the US?of all people I should know but I dont

I'm pretty sure its just certain provinces in Canada for now anyway.

 

[shithawk420]

That's what I thought.thanks

 

[s13sr20det]

Saw on Facebook they're gonna have their own beer soon.... Freedom 35! :friends:

https://www.facebook.com/trailerparkboys/videos/1160876640666556/

And now they're getting into legal weed

http://www.vice.com/read/the-trailer-park-boys-will-soon-be-selling-legal-weed?utm_source=vicefbus

Way to go boys!!

 

[blastfrompast]

Just selling their brand name...they built it...they own it...they can sell it.

Hopefully it is marketted better than Snoop dog "brown"...

seriously who calls their shit "brown"...unless they are actually talking about their turds....

 

[who dat is]

"develop branding, packaging, and a competitive product portfolio targeted towards recreational marijuana consumers and distributed exclusively by OrganiGram."

that sounds like they are just using their brand to sell some pot & booze. not actually growing/brewing themselves. linking up with other corporations to make extra capital is expected, but not something I can applaud them for.

long live the mustard tiger...!

View Image

RIP Mustard Tiger

 

[shithawk420]

Damn I wish I was canadian!I wanna try the beer and whiskey damnit! Rip Philadelphia Collins