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Ketchup and Mustard Conspiracy

floralheart

Active member
Veteran
Gentlemen, I bring to you evidence of a vast and far reaching conspiracy, to eliminate ketchup and mustard packets from everyday life.

They started in the 90's with having the customer ask for the packet.

Like frogs in hot water they didn't realize they were being boiled alive.

In the 00's, it was customary to charge for packets and condiments.

Now in 2010 and beyond, they no longer carry mustard.

Today, I started cooking a corn dog when I realized the mustard was bad. No problem, I'll just use a packet. Guess what? There aren't any.

Just like Inception, they've been Inceptioned packaged mustard out of existence and I'm living in some 80's dream world, where I can have mustard on my corn dog without going to a store to buy it.

Let the commie chinese pry the ketchup from your cold dead fingers. This aggression will not stand.
 
L

longearedfriend

wait so you cooked a corn dog at home.... your mustard was bad

where do you usually take your mustard or ketchup packets from ?

basically you go to a place and put them in your pocket and bring them home ?
 

Slim Pickens

Well-known member
Veteran
Who are you?The Mustard Packet Police? :D j/k... pocketing the packets is an American Tradition and a right spelled out in the Bill of Rights.(well,maybe not the Bill of Rights....but it's still a right...and there are dark and sinister forces who want to take them from us)

Stand Up for your rights! POCKET THE PACKETS!!
 

HidingInTheHaze

Active member
Veteran
The real ketchup conspiracy is tomato's aren't the main ingredient in tomato ketchup, high fructose corn syrup is. They should call it cornchup lol.
 

Infinitesimal

my strength is a number, and my soul lies in every
ICMag Donor
Veteran
its not that they don't make the mustard packs anymore... I just use them ALL...

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for LUBE!
 

Infinitesimal

my strength is a number, and my soul lies in every
ICMag Donor
Veteran
but seriously I do hate when I forget to ask for ketchup and napkins it does suck that I have to ask for that shit...

but that is just what happens when you have a fiat based monetary policy, the result is runaway inflation which we feel as an increase in cost of goods.... AND... in order to maintain your sacred dollar menus... they have to cut costs somewhere and that means not handing out sauces and napkins liberally like yesteryear
 

trichrider

Kiss My Ring
Veteran
...ketchup and mustard are the antidotes...

and i'm utilizing homeopathy to stretch my supply.
 
Last edited:

Dawn Patrol

Well this is some bullshit right here.....
Veteran
Gentlemen, I bring to you evidence of a vast and far reaching conspiracy, to eliminate ketchup and mustard packets from everyday life.

They started in the 90's with having the customer ask for the packet.

Like frogs in hot water they didn't realize they were being boiled alive.

In the 00's, it was customary to charge for packets and condiments.

Now in 2010 and beyond, they no longer carry mustard.

Today, I started cooking a corn dog when I realized the mustard was bad. No problem, I'll just use a packet. Guess what? There aren't any.

Just like Inception, they've been Inceptioned packaged mustard out of existence and I'm living in some 80's dream world, where I can have mustard on my corn dog without going to a store to buy it.

Let the commie chinese pry the ketchup from your cold dead fingers. This aggression will not stand.

I'm still trying to understand your basic point - you had mustard that went bad??????
 

m314

Active member
ICMag Donor
Veteran
The real ketchup conspiracy is tomato's aren't the main ingredient in tomato ketchup, high fructose corn syrup is. They should call it cornchup lol.

They make low carb ketchup now that's free of high fructose corn syrup. It's awesome unless you think sucralose is bad for you too.
 

Stoner4Life

Medicinal Advocate
ICMag Donor
Veteran
it's the mid 60's & I'm at a Yankees game with my best friend and his father, we have our hotdogs and other stuff but my pal Greg still has his mustard packets unused. He tosses them down & is gonna step on them but his dad stops him, finally when the game ends and everyone is getting up Greg stomps down and pops a packet of mustard. Kablooie! it explodes all over the back of the guy seated in front of us, this was the 60's and most gentlemen showed up @ ball games in suits.

Mr B's eyes lit up and he made the shush sign across his lips & we got outta the stands in a hurry, that guy had no idea.......
 

HidingInTheHaze

Active member
Veteran
They make low carb ketchup now that's free of high fructose corn syrup. It's awesome unless you think sucralose is bad for you too.

Organic ketchup is the way to go, it's all tomatoes and no HFCS. The taste is like night and day, once you eat real tomato ketchup it is hard to go back to cornchup.
 

m314

Active member
ICMag Donor
Veteran
Organic ketchup is the way to go, it's all tomatoes and no HFCS. The taste is like night and day, once you eat real tomato ketchup it is hard to go back to cornchup.

I'll have to check that out. I haven't seen it at my regular grocery store, but I bet they'd have it at Whole Foods.

I had my first tomato harvest recently. They taste amazing, much better than the ones I get at the grocery store. I didn't get enough to make ketchup, unfortunately.
 

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