Close Encounters of the almost got busted kind.....

[Fermented]

I harvested some Thai plants I grew up in the mountains, there was more than I thought there was and it filled up my back pack to the brim! I caught a bus back to the city and two cops got on one stop later. Cops in this city never catch a bus but I read later that there was a serial molester on public transport in the area at that time. To say the bus smelled a little greenish was an understatement...It was the middle of day and there was just me and the cops, they got off next stop.

Another time I was riding my motorcycle with plastic bag with 1.5 kilos of dried Thai hanging from the handlebars that I had just picked up from a mule who had flown in from the land of smiles...I turned the corner on a red (yeah, I know that's stupid, but it's Asia and everyone sort of obeys most of the laws some of the time!) and there was a cop standing beside the road about hundred meters from the corner, I saw him, he saw me and so I rode up on the sidewalk (you are allowed to park bikes on the sidewalk), and rode back the way I came .....very fast!

Let's hear about your almost got busted story.....and also, please don't post stories about getting busted, I want just positives not handcuffs in this thread.

 

[Branchsnapper]

Back in 93 I had 10 plants flowering behind a false wall in the corner of my yard. One morning, was making coffee and noticed 2 workers up a telephone pole right above the plants. There is no way they didn't see them. Shit my pants pretty hard on that, and pulled en as soon as they got down( 3 weeks early). Peeking out window for a week, but nobody ever came . Another time when I was a teen, I just bought a pound brick, and was on my way home in my bike. Ran into some buddies in front of a liquor store , and stopped to talk for a minute. A cop stopped across the street, and was just staring, so said goodbye and cut down an alley. The second I was out of view, I yanked it out and dropped it in middle of alley(no time to toss, I knew he was right behind). He pulled into alley, and flashed lights, stopping right above brick. Searched me, ran my name, let me go, and I was able to circle back and see he was fuckin with my buddies. Grabbed brick, and got the hell out of dodge!

 

[St. Phatty]

ASHAMED - got busted with Mexican Mersh.

Maybe the cop was doing me a favor when he took it away ?

Memorial day 1989, SF park near the ocean.

Judge threw it out.

 

[Bud Green]

Saved by the narcs

Saved by the narcs

Summer of '74..

Had to deliver a pound to some friends house on a Sunday about noon. I had a ponytail that went most of the way down my back.
I put the weed in a small backpack and tied it on the sissybar of my motorcycle.
Picked up another buddy on the bike and we headed for our friend's house about 3 miles away.

On the way there I passed a middle aged man, with his wife and kids, who was driving too slow.
One mile later we pull up into our friend's front yard. As we get off the motorcycle,
the family car I had passed hauls ass up behind us in the yard and the man jumps out in his Church clothes and starts waving a badge..

He's all pissed off and yelling that I passed him illegally a mile back so he chased me down.
He's yelling and walking around the motorcycle, checking the licence plate and inspection sticker and things like the headlights.
He hasn't gotten to ask about the backpack yet when a city narc car pulls up...
(Back in those days we could spot a narc car from a mile away..They were all, new 4-door Ford Fairlanes, painted in pastel colors.
And the narcs all wore nylon windbreakers..)

My buddy and I are about to shit, when the narc intercepts the cop who is yelling at us, and gets in an argument with him..
Five minutes later the cop gets in the car with his wife and kids and takes off.

The narc comes up to me and my buddy, and starts apologizing profusely. (there's a pound of pot in the backpack less then 6 feet away from him)
He says the "cop" that was hassling us was an off-duty, auxillary cop from the adjacent city ..

The narc apologizes to me again saying this other "cop" had no business pulling us over and messing with us.
He gets back in his narc car and takes off!

My buddy and I get the backpack of weed off the motorcycle and walk up to our friend's front door..
Four guys in the house have been peeking out the windows the whole time and are totally freaking out!

...

 

[Branchsnapper]

Lol at Peeking out the window freaking out. Wish I had a dollar for every time I was in those situations. Glad I can laugh about it now

 

[Branchsnapper]

Another time, when I was about 18 my buddies dad went on a business trip, and about 6 or 7 of us got together to buy some acid, weed, beers for a night at his house. We had a q.p. dumped on coffee table to smoke, and split up, and all just dropped a good amount of pinpoint. Someone knocks on door, so buddy gets up to answer- nobody even thinking twice about it. Well about 30 seconds later here he is walking into room, face white as a ghost with the most scared look on his face I have ever seen, and right after him is a Marshall. You wouldn't believe how quiet it got in an instant. Totally hotboxed room, out of the corners of my eyes I just see everyone's arms slowly pulling bongs, pipes, etc off table into couch, under chairs, etc like he didn't already see everything. He laughed and asked a similar looking buddy his name--bobby, then looked at me , and asked my name. Too fucked up, and stupid I say uh, bobby.. jig was up. He was looking for me, and I knew it already, and I guess I didn't get away, as this thread asks, but he let me empty my pockets and give the acid, weed, paraphernalia to them so I wouldn't get in more trouble when they searched at jail. Nobody would take it, so just left on ground . Good times!

 

[Dr. Purpur]

Summer of 77

My buddy and I went to live on Maui. We hitched rides everywhere. We were on our way to the Seven Sacred Pools, on the windward side of the island to camp and pick shrooms. We didnt get the last ride we needed along the Hana highway, and stopped to crash out on a beach. We were woken by police who arrested us for sleeping there, then proceeded to search my backpack, where they found a couple grams of Maui weed and a small bong.

They threw us hand cuffed into the back of a paddy wagon, and drove us back over the single lane bumpy roads we had just previously traveled.

The Wailuku jail was open to the elements, and my buddy who was talking through the bars to the guy in the next cell, beckoned me over. My buddy said to the guy "Tell him what you did".


So the guy tells me how he broke into the Catholic church down the road. Hawaii's oldest church. He stold the money from behind the podium, then masterbated on the Virgin Mary statue. After that he lit the curtains on fire, which accidently got out of control, and burnt the church to the ground. This was the church everyones parents and grand parents were married in.....

I looked at the guy and said " Man, you really are crazy. You are safer in here behind bars, then going out there with the locals


I was out the next day with a $30 fine

 

[Plybot]

 

[St. Phatty]

in hindsight, i wish i had asked the cop if i could keep the seeds.

Mexican Sativa !!!

dang you guys are playing around with the smilies.

 

[OldSidwasright]

Summer 1989. My girlfriend (now wife) and I (with shoulder blade long brown wavy hair...hard to imagine now!) drive our 1971 orange with purple paisley curtains VW westfalia bus from Santa Barbara, CA to Key West, FL and back over the course of the entire summer. On the way to Key West, after spending the night in Big Bend National Park in Texas...not recommended...100 degrees and 100% day and night...miserable...we decided to take some obscure dirt roads across the caliche desert in order to search for peyote cactus on our way to South Padre Island where we planned to spend the next night.

Now understand, we packed "supplies" to last us for an entire summer, plus we had onboard extra "supplies" to gift to my uncle on Sanibel Island FL who we were going to visit on the way to Key West. Here's a breakdown of the "supplies" onboard, in sealed mason jars or double bagged gallon ziplock bags with orange peels to provide a little bit of moisture in the containers in the westfalia icebox behind the passenger seat: about 4 ounces of premium Stropharia Cubensis, 150 Grateful Dead Album Covers LSD tabs and about a pound of my home grown "Gangus Amangus" cannabis...think it was Tangie that was going around SB at that time.

Oh yea, and we had the, in hindsight, incredibly stupid, pretty much daily, practice of around 11:00 a.m. or so, flipping the hinged cutting board over the sink, exposing the sink, filling the sink with ice and Foster's Lager cans (yes, the big ones). By noon, my co-pilot and I were cleaning out the sink. Even more not recommended!!! By the way, thise old buses had the perfect configuration not having to pull over to relieve one's bladder: to wit: hoseclamp an automatic transmission funnel to the steering column, with the end protruding through the opening in the floor where the steering column goes through. Just need to tilt the top of the funnel toward crotch, take aim and leave a snail trail behind...

But I digress...so we've got the Fosters' on ice and are toolin' down the road cranking Peter Tosh probably, getting ready to pop the first can and what do we see in the middle of the road? A stop sign in a cement filled tire for a base. As I slow down approaching the sign, I see the airstream trailer off to the side of the road with the big ass Texas Sate Police Star...ruh roh. Little weaselly guy comes out of the door of the trailer, walks up to me at the driver door and tells me to exit the vehicle and stand next to the other officer on the side of the road. "What other officer?" I say. Then I see Hans Aryan Race Gargantua, about 6'8" x 300 lbs. of scary uniform. He walks out of the trailer with a german sheppard, hands the leash for the dog to weaselly guy and comes over to the side of the road and stands next to me with his hand on his gun. I'm starting to wonder how many pieces they are going to cut my body into. Wife starts to exist vehicle; weaselly guy tells her to stay put; she stays put. Weaselly guys starts tearing the bus apart; opening cupboards, taking sleeping bags out of stuff sacks, looking in pillow cases, all the while with the german sheppard sniffing in the interior of the bus.

He never opened the icebox. Can't fucking believe it to this day. Never flipped over the cutting board either...that might not have got us arrested, although maybe, but for sure it wouldn't have been good. But not opening the icebox is I think probabilistically speaking, about a 1% probability.

I've never been in Texas since and won't ever again be. I know Karma to be real, and I got away...literally!...when 99 out of 100 times I wouldn't. I'm not going to put myself in the crosshairs of Karmic justice.

Have a VW Vanagon Westfailia now...really miss that steering column hole in the floor...

 

[OldSidwasright]

Postscrip: upon driving away from the stop sign in the middle of the dirt road, we agreed to abandon the peyote mission and beeline for South Padre Island where we consumed a bunch of the mushrooms and cannabis and Fosters and frolicked in the poptop at our beach campsite. Remember hearing the matriarch of the mexican family camped next to us exclaim "Gringos Loco!" Yep.

 

[Dr. Purpur]

January 2010


I had a 5x5 tent going upstairs that vented through a carbon filter, then through a wall into the downstairs attic. I was growing Old Grand Daddy Purple, and it was ripe and reeking like you wouldnt believe. The carbon filter was breaking down.

About 2-3am I awoke to a boom boom boom on my front door. I got up and went to peek out the upstairs window before answering the door. There were at least 3 patrol cars out front, 3 cops standing in a circle on my driveway, and another cop at my door pounding non stop. My heart raced. I knew I was going to jail.....

I didnt answer the door.
The cops attempted to go through my gate into my back yard, but it was locked. So they went into my neighbors back yard instead. I rushed to my back window to see the cops lifting a police dog over the fence into my yard. ( I had some plants in the green house too)

Im watching this dog run through out the yard, but not near my plants. All this time, its just reeking like crazy out there. I think I shut off the fan too.

The dog returns to the cops and they left.

Next day I asked the neighbor what was up, and he said, " you know how sometimes I can smell your grow ? Well last night was the worst ever, and the cops were here. He got a knock first, and opened. The cops walked right in, through his home and into his yard. He said it stunk so bad, it was unreal.

Evidently they were in pursuit of a burglar on foot, running through yards to evade them. I know they smelled the weed. Im glad they didnt pursue that

 

['Boogieman']

When I was 19 I got busted growing 12 plants outdoors in a irrigation ditch next to a cornfield. Somebody escaped from prison and the cops were walking the woods and cornfields looking for him when they found my plants and set up cameras. They immediately knew who I was when I visited to water and arrested me the next day. It was a class D felony manufacturing 1oz-10 pounds at the time. I was given a year in jail (6 months with good time) and 6 months probation.

 

[Fermented]

There's been some excellent almost got busted stories......keep em coming, I love that feeling of "dodging a bullet" and reading your lucky, happy stories of almost getting busted then somehow not makes me feels good!

There's been a few stories in the this thread where the author got busted and it's partly my fault with the subject heading wording, I just edited the first post in this thread that emphasizes almost got busted stories only.... I like a happy ending and handcuffs are not that.

 

[Fermented]

The 80's in Thailand was probably the best time for a single guy who liked to smoke, drink, ride, beach, party and live a crazy wild tropical 3rd world life, so I went there as often as I could!

Every time I flew back in Sydney after being in Thailand for a month, airport customs would pull aside for a baggage search, I was never ever just waved through without a search of my bags. They would be squeezing out toothpaste, smelling shampoo containers, looking into the suitcase liner, unrolling socks, emptying my pockets, etc etc. I was strip searched once too. By the way I had never ever been arrested for anything, so I'm not sure why the airport customs always gave me the 3rd degree search, I assumed I just fitted a certain race/age/sex profile and being a frequent traveler to Asia which might of been the reason but actually years later I found out a big time drug dealer from another state had the same name as me (but a different middle name) !

I tried to be as polite and nice as possible answering questions but after the 20th time of useless delays and the same dumb questions when trying to enter my own country I got a bit impatient.
They would always ask questions like
"who bought your plane ticket?".
" I did".
"What were you doing in Thailand?"
"Living like it's New Year's Eve every single night of the week" (which was not an exaggeration)
How can you afford to do this several times per year?

but by this time I was fed up with the same accusations and said " How can I afford to? Easy, I bet I paid more in tax this year than you earned, I'm single, I don't have a mortgage and I have a company car....do you really think I would be so stupid to try and smuggle some heroin or whatever into Australia?" I then pointed to a little old Italian grandmother and said " look at her, getting waved through the gates again without a second glance. They're the ones that are doing the smuggling, not me mate!" as I muttered "sheeesh!".

As I was saying this, the officer was into my toiletries bag, opening, squeezing, smelling, everything then he picks up can of my underarm deodorant (you could fly with any type of pressurized can back in those days) carefully studying it, he holds it up to gauge the weight of it, shakes it several times, reads the writing on it, studies the bottom of the can, taps the bottom and tries to unscrew it (?) then he stops what he was doing, looks at me and says "Well, maybe next time you will think we won't search you and you will try and smuggle drugs into Australia and we'll catch you".

I just laughed at his stupidity, then shook my head slowly side to side as I looked dead pan into his eyes. I looked up at the ceiling muttering "you time wasting, petty, phucken dickhead" over and over again. I bet he wanted to be a cop but failed the physical.

It was at that moment I remembered where those 3 joints were. Stuck inside the lid of that deodorant can! I had stashed them there when I was leaving Koh Samuii for the one night in Bangkok before flying home but I ran into some mates at the Pong early on and I got blurred on their bud and just forgot about those 3 skinny joints, woke up late, rushed to the airport

Then his attention was back on the deodorant can, he snaps the cap off, holds the can in one hand and looks at the nozzle while holding the cap/lid in his other hand so I could see those 3 joints jammed into the inside double rim of the cap! There's nothing quite like that instant slap on face realization that you're about to be phucked...but I held it in, as you have to.

Much to my amazement, the officer did not look inside the lid, snapped the lid back on and he completed his search, I repacked my bags, zipped up and he said "You may go now" I said "Thank you officer" with a pleasant smile on my face .........a big, slow exhale of relief as I walked through the automatic doors .........and caught a cab home.

Those three joints were very greatly appreciated!

 

[St. Phatty]

once i was in my underwear with a closet or bedroom full of plants.

i put the garbage out on the front step - and there was a crew of about 10 DEA, including some women agents, right outside my door. one of those early morning visits.

they were there for my neighbor, Joey, who was connected with a large grow (3000+ plants) in a forest outside of LA.

fortunately Joey stayed out of jail. they were smart enough (no fingerprints) to have no provable connection to the larger grow.

"haven't had my coffee yet bro."

 

[Fermented]

Also in Thailand in the 80's.....I was flying out of Koh Samuii to Bangkok with a few friends. Back then airport security was super lax or non-existent, so I slipped about a handful of bud that I had already cleaned up*, compressed and double bagged and slid into the front of my under pants which were those bikini briefs made from stretchy material that had a double layer on the front with side slits so you could hide buds in there on either side.

But on that day some Muslim bombers blew up a cop station and security was code red so every passenger and their carry on was thoroughly searched, There were uniforms everywhere carrying rifles...it really quite tense after living the beach life for a month. I thought, no problem, they never do body pad down searches here..then I saw each passenger getting a really professional pad down

They called my flight, then it was my turn to stand with my arms out so a security guy could pat me down. He used both his open flat palms to really pad me all over, really thoroughly, my arms, front torso, back, Pad, pad pad all over and then pad pad up my thighs, front pockets, empty them, show the contents and some how, I think by accident, he touched the side of my groin and felt the packaged lump of half ounce semi-compressed bud that was hidden in there, he instantly looked up at me with a quizzical look on his face and I looked at him with a totally pleasant look on my face and then he said "OK" waved me off the spot and called the next passenger.

Then I was feeling a combination of being dreamy, floaty, invincible, happy, grateful, relieved state boarding the plane...thinking, damn, Fermented, you are a cat with nine lives.

* remove every seed, stick, stem and every little bit that isn't a seed bract or solid bud, this would reduce the amount by half and would take a long time, but it was worth it as it smoked way smoother and had a better high than with all those bits of stem..the best place to do this is on a large glass surface with good lighting.

 

[Fermented]

Another time, also in Thailand in the 80's ...I was just about out of ganja, so I asked one of the bar girls I knew that also smoked where could I score some. She didn't smoke any more but knew where she could score some for me in Phucket town which is about 20 minutes away from the beach and she wanted a lift into Phuket town and back so I said "shit yeah! Let's go".

She does her banking, then she directs me to an outer secondary road with ramshackle roadside shacks selling or repairing stuff and big trucks roaring past kicking up lots of dust..there were no tourists around here lol.

We both go into a little wooden shack that was halfway falling down that sold smokes, drinks and snacks. An old lady ran the shop and as soon as she saw me she starts yelling and cursing in a super fast southern Thai accent "Get that whitey out of here now! What are trying to do, get me busted?, I'm not selling you or him anything, get out now"
I spoke enough Thai to understand what she saying, so I spoke up quickly and apologized to her, said I respected how careful she was but I'm a good guy. This seemed to chill the old girl down and she handed over two cylindrical packages (4'' x 1.5") wrapped in newspaper, I paid .. then looked me dead in the eyes and said "Hey Whitey, you speak good Thai, but don't come back here ever again, ok". I said "ok, I won't".

I forget how much it was exactly but it was the cheapest ganja I have ever bought in my life. I didn't have a look at it until I got back to my apartment in Patong Beach..it was better then average ganja. I never did go back there. She probably paid enough to the cops for them to turn a blind eye to selling a bit ganja to locals but if they saw me there then they would probably ask her for more money or bust her.

Well, about half way back to the beach, a cop on a bike passed me, looked back a few times then waved me down to stop. I immediately turned around as I was slowing down and hissed at her accusingly "what the fuck!?" I thought right then and there that I had been setup. She said in Thai "Hey, it's cool, chill, it's okay...really"

All I had were very really shitty choices running through my brain at that moment run, fight, bribe...I was a little panicked but tried to put on the face of a dumb, innocent tourist

He says in Thai to her as she is getting off my bike "Who is this guy you're with?" she says "Just a friend who gave me a lift to the bank". The cop smiled an I'd love to kiss you smile at her and said "How about I give you a lift back to Patong?" Right then I had a flood of relief hit me. I wasn't going to have a gun pointed at me! He just wanted to bang her!

She says to me "Thank you for the lift, I'm going to go with him, is that ok? bye"..then whispered "I told you it was chillsville, he's an old boyfriend of mine"...and off she went sitting side saddle on the cop's bike.

and I just sat there on my bike on the side of the road and felt that wonderful, scary, exhilarating,"almost died and survived" floating feeling ....then rode nice and slow and easy back to the beach.

I've been back to Thailand in the 90's and 2000's but it's not the same to me. I've changed, Thailand has changed, what was appealing is not so anymore etc etc.

 

[billy_big_bud!]

damn fermented you seem like you have had some epic adventures...

 

[flylowgethigh]

I have had a package with a load get intercepted by the inspectors, which I didn't know when I went to the PO with a tracking number, looking for this package I was supposed to be getting, that was strange in the tracking info.

Introduced myself to my new lawyer after that, and gave him a nice bribe to remember me. Also went and introduced myself to the bail guy. Just in case...

Stoopit, stoopit, stoopit. Fergit the ones that get sidetracked. Don't check tracking. Make damn sure the address is correct. If anyone asks about the package, deny knowing anything about it.

Nothing happened. yet. Been 3 years.