Another Joke-I promise will make you laugh.

[Ronley]

Three little ducks go into a Bar . . .

"Say, what's your name?" the bartender asked the first duck. "Huey," was the
reply.

"How's your day been, Huey?"

"Great. Lovely day. Had a ball. Been in and out of puddles all day. What
else could a duck want?" said Huey.

"Oh. That's nice," said the bartender. He turned to the second duck, "Hi,
and what's your name?"

"Dewey," came the answer from duck number two.

"So how's your day been, Dewey?" He asked.

"Great. Lovely day. I've had a ball too. Been in and out of puddles all day
myself. What else could a duck want?"

The bartender turned to the third duck and said, "So, you must be Louie?"
"No," she said, batting her eyelashes.

"My name is Puddles."

 

[Grat3fulh3ad]

made me laugh

 

[PhenoMenal]

I chuckled

 

[FallenBuddha]

LOL

peace -fb

 

[rusto]

hahah I've heard that before, good joke.

 

[Guest]

haha, can't lie, i laughed

 

[TheGoodStuff]

Nice one

 

[Yummybud]

I sharted in my pants.

 

[CC Rider]

most deffinitly a good chuckle!

 

[gizerakos]

lollll..nice one

 

[genkisan]

The wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making love to a very attractive young woman and was somewhat upset. "You are a disrespectful pig!" she cried. "How dare you do this to me -- a faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving you. I want a divorce straight away!"

And the husband replied "Hang on just a minute love, so at least I can tell you what happened. "Fine, go ahead," she sobbed, but they'll be the last words you'll say to me!!



And the husband began --



"Well, I was getting into the car to drive home and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defenseless that I took pity on her and let her into the car. I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days! So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night, the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight. The poor thing devoured them in moments.

Since she needed a good clean up I suggested a shower, and while she was doing that I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes so I threw them away. Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans tha t you have had for a few years, but don't use because you say they are too tight. I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present, which you don't use because I don't have good taste. I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don't use just to annoy her, and I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive boutique and don't use because someone at work has a pair the same."

The husband took a quick breath and continued - "She was so grateful for my understanding and help and as I walked her to the door she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said, Please do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?"

 

[Ronley]

lol. again,
nice one Genkisan

 

[Herbalista]

Spring time joke:"What does a Bee do with it's stinger at night?"......He sticks it in his honey..."What do you call a dirty Raggedy Ann doll with rocks in it's mouth?"...A dirty cotten rock sucker...like flash backs they come....ummm.."Walt Disney's not dead,he's in suspended animation"..."Once you've seen one nuclear war,you've seen them all"..."What do ya' call lesbian twins?....lick a likes"...ACK...I just rubbed my eye with a resiny finger!The PAIN!....Don't laugh at my pain....

 

[gmb]

This is turning into quite the joke thread. Well.....

My girlfriend says I'm a pedophile. That's a big word for a 12 year old.

Edit: Oh..and thumbs up on the other jokes. Good stuff.