Another drug testing thread.

[Mr_Grimbo]

My kid is an extreme athlete, very little body fat, in the gym 3-4 hours a day. Good diet, 105 pounds, 5'1" again, very little body fat. My question is simple I hope. After reading all about dilution, substitution etc I am wondering if using diuretics, lots of gatorade, a couple aspirin a day along with regular workouts and abstaining for one week from smoking ( daily smoker) might get a clean urine test without dilution or substitution or if that's just impossible... If you say it's possible we may try it and just have a home test kit ready the day of the test and a pack of substitute if we test dirty that morning. So, should I even bother trying to clean with flushing and exercise, fluids and diuretics, or just get the substitute (which is really not the way we want to go) and not bother with our own home test kit.

My kid is over 20 yo and started smoking at 19 in lieu of the anti anxiety and sleep drugs they wanted to start using, for what we will just call ptsd. It has worked wonders, my kid is back training and competing, sleeps all night, can eat the day of events, trains, can talk to people, it has really changed life but unfortunately the perfect job just got offered out of the blue wants a drug test asap, and I think I can delay it for 7 days... the job is in our "sport" so a failed test would get around and could actually cost sponsorship's and even career.. Thanks for any help.

Thanks, Mr. Grimbo

 

[JKD]

You can buy your own testing kits where I am - if you are able to do the same it will give a fair idea of where he is at with testing. Good Luck!

 

[4.2.0.Cardinal]

If you had another week or two I'd say go for it. With that low of body fat I could see it in 2 to 3 weeks. Only having a week though I'd personally go with substitution. When done correctly is a guaranteed pass. The other methods might not make you piss dirty, but a diluted result can just as easily cause a failure. At the very least a retest. Which could buy more time if the employer takes that route.

The biggest determining factor for me would be how monitored is the test? Supervised like Department of Corrections tests? Or completely private like a standard pre employment test? If totally private I would just sub. It works guaranteed so long as you have a clean sample.

This is just my opinion based on my own personal research in the past. Either way you go good luck.

 

[Mr_Grimbo]

We may have to... It really caught us by surprise because we didn't intend for him to work for a couple years to work on his sport, but got an offer in the industry, one that it would look funny if we turned down too, can't really elaborate on that but anything we do here but pass, even if we were to "decide" we don't want the job, is gonna' be sketchy...

These folks want my kid bad because he is a big draw in our industry, well known, well branded, and likable...We are thinking of going down and talking to the Mgr and see how they feel about hiring someone who didn't pass... or going the sub route.

 

[Jhhnn]

I suspect it depends on consumption level, as well. Heavy tokers will, in general, need more time to reduce metabolites to a passing level. They start out w/ higher levels.

I've known occasional tokers who got high Friday night to pass a DOT mandated random test on Monday morning.

Substitution of clean human urine works every time, if it's at an acceptable temperature.

 

[igrowone]

i will pass on 1 item, and it's half remembered at that
another popular mj site, and this guy is talking about gatorade + gelatin
or something like that, can't recall say for sure
i was quite sceptical, but saw him post pics of mj tests which started out dirty and were clean in 2 days or so, maybe just 1
it's the internet so buyer beware, but did get my attention

 

[JVonChron]

have a close friend that matches description. they are closer to 6 ft. and +55 pounds. every day smoker. said they took a dip(urine) test you can buy from store and after 20 days no consumption and passed. so it coulda been sooner in all actuality(depends on how they test it as well). so really time wise shouldn't risk it. just get substitute, the issue with that is keepin it warm(attach to leg or use the hand warmers they sell) you can also look into synthetic urine, another buddy swears by it... good luck

 

[SourDank]

I always just used someone else's urine to play it safe because the human body can be a funny thing sometimes but it can't hurt to try the method you found online, but I would definitely have someone else's urine that's clean ready as well

 

[4.2.0.Cardinal]

have a close friend that matches description. they are closer to 6 ft. and +55 pounds. every day smoker. said they took a dip(urine) test you can buy from store and after 20 days no consumption and passed. so it coulda been sooner in all actuality(depends on how they test it as well). so really time wise shouldn't risk it. just get substitute, the issue with that is keepin it warm(attach to leg or use the hand warmers they sell) you can also look into synthetic urine, another buddy swears by it... good luck

My girlfriend and I have used synthetic on multiple occasions work great success. As with human sub sample temp is the most important part, but the good thing is you can warm it up ready to use in 10 seconds in the microwave and if you heat it and don't use it it's still good months later.

 

[NotaProfessor]

An alternative is to have your son take an impromptu 2-3 week vacation into the wilderness. That would give him time to dry out and a reason for delay. "Sorry, he's incommunicado - no cell phone access in [remote locale]. He'll pee when he gets back." Why did he leave? He wanted to get this trip in before being locked down with a job.


OT - I think pee tests are a way for employers to test compliance in prospective employees. What they are essentially saying is "I'm ready to give you the job, but there's one more thing. I have to put my dick in your mouth for a little bit. You are not obligated to suck on it, you just have to hold it there for the required amount of time, and I'm not going to come while it's in there. I just have to have this one test though. [unzips] Do you want the job?" I was asked to pee for a job only once about 20 years ago, I refused and they still gave me the job. YMMV.

 

[Behind_The_Mask]

your a cool ass dad

im self employed but my buddy never got a job without a test and he always used one of those drinks and was always fine...your dice to roll

id just cut out the ganja and drink hella water and still use the drink

 

[stoned-trout]

5/1 and 105 is your kid riding the horsies??????? good luck

 

[Mr_Grimbo]

As a followup we were advised by a coach in the industry to try a drink and process so we went to one of our sponsors and they had it, so we did the routine. It would have been 48 hours but the coach (who has coached on a national level and had players tested/passed) said it would work for our athlete.
Unfortunately, we will never know because when we walked in, they took a hair sample instead so we went to the perspective boss and told them there might be a possibility that we would fail and explained the situation. The boss is just gonna' ask if my athelete can be hired anyway, if there is any leeway in the restrictions.
Sorry that's all I have for now, I think they may hire us anyway if it isn't written in stone policy.

Thanks, Mr. Grimbo

 

[JVonChron]

oh no the dreaded hair follicle test. those are hard to beat. buddy of mine abstained for 90 days and bleached/cut/bleach his hair along the way in order to pass his. hope things work out for you all.

 

[nukklehead]

well hell while we are on the issue..

i could be subject to random oral swab testing.

I pack commercially available mouthwash but dont hold too much
faith in it... ( wash specifically designed for drug testing)

Any new info on how to beat this test??? and or the latest and greatest products??

 

[Mr_Grimbo]

oh no the dreaded hair follicle test. those are hard to beat. buddy of mine abstained for 90 days and bleached/cut/bleach his hair along the way in order to pass his. hope things work out for you all.

No, they did not do a follicle test, they just cut a piece of hair close to the scalp line. Now we are wondering if we should have done the shampoo... Still no return on the test.

 

[Grobbleskin]

Is employers forcing you to take a drug test a regular thing in the US? How is that accepted? You insist on the rights of kids to own guns so they can go around murdering strangers, yet you let employers dictate to you what you can and can't do during the time that you're not at work?

 

[armedoldhippy]

well hell while we are on the issue..

i could be subject to random oral swab testing.

I pack commercially available mouthwash but dont hold too much
faith in it... ( wash specifically designed for drug testing)

Any new info on how to beat this test??? and or the latest and greatest products??

from my reading, the mouth swab only works for about 4 hours after smoking, which is why some highway patrol depts carry it. am unsure if this has changed. anyone?

 

[Eighths-n-Aces]

from my reading, the mouth swab only works for about 4 hours after smoking, which is why some highway patrol depts carry it. am unsure if this has changed. anyone?

a patient of mine just got burned on a mouth swab test and got fired. IMHO the company used the test so they could fire a cancer patient without looking like the complete assholes that they are. they got another employee to say she was smoking at work (which gives them the "right" to test) but the patient does not even smoke

this person has been taking simpson oil and is at around a gram a day so her levels are probably way higher than most smokers. hard to say if her massive doses got her caught or the test is sensitive enough to pick up anything. FWIW she said she had taken a dose about 3 hours before they swabbed her and i figure that would sure a hell leave enough residue in your mouth to get a positive for THC

the company is nationwide so they don't give a shit about the fact that she lives in colorado, has been diagnosed with cancer or has a med card and they can get away with it. lawyers have been called, but they say her chances of winning a lawsuit are pretty slim

 

[Gry]

Real sad stuff here. Sure hope the young one make out OK.